to think my sister is a liar and I should call her out on it?

[starlightlover]

I bought my sister for her birthday a groupon family portrait to be done (she's a new mum so thought it would be nice to have professional photos done etc).

I recently asked her if she'd ever had the photographs done, she replied that when I'd given her the groupon gift the date had already expired but she didn't want to say.

I felt quite upset with myself that I'd given her such a useless present. Reading a recent thread on here reminded me so I decided to look back at my groupon orders, and her birthday is right at the end of March and the expiration date on the groupon was the end of April.

I feel sad that she felt the need to lie to me, but in turn she also made me feel bad for giving her present that was useless when in fact it wasn't.

Should I say something?

I think those things work out quite expensively if because you still have to buy the photos they take. Sorry. I wouldn't use one for that reason. Unless prints were included.

REALLY? BECAUSE I HAVE REPEATEDLY SAID I DON'T MIND THAT SHE DIDN'T USE THE GIFT.

THAT IS NOT THE ISSUE HERE.

ah right, all the same you are being quite harsh

maybe she thought the lie was a white lie, rather than one designed to hurt

sounds like you are really wanting to have this out with her anyway

I think people are missing your point OP. it's fine that she didn't want to use the gift but I think it was unfair of her to tell the op that she had given her an out of date gift. I can see why you feel it makes you look bad. But at least you found out from this thread that you are indeed an evil gift giver just not for the reason you thought!

Agree with lulu, sounds like a white lie. She didn't fancy using the gift for whatever reason, and just wanted to explain why. She obviously couldn't tell you she didn't want it, could she? Just leave it.

When did you buy the Groupon? Because they don't normally have such short expiry dates.

Op I can't speak for everyone else but there were a couple of important pieces of info that you failed to make clear in your original post. Therefore by the time responses have been written details have changed so yabu to become so frustrated with everyone!
Anyway, now all the facts are clear I still feel your sister inbu. It sounds like a mistake rather than a lie and as I said before, a month in the future may as well be out of date. Move on it's not a big deal. Really.

Haha exactly Catsdontcare. But I am actually an evil tacky gift giver.

• I'd also like to point out that this wasn't the only gift I got her, I get an email from groupon everyday and saw it so I thought it would be nice and I'd give her the chance to use it if she wanted a professional photo of her and her family. It did include one free photo and some put on a CD.

I just wish she felt she could have told me the truth, that whilst it was a nice gesture it wasn't really her thing. Or she could have said sorry by the time I came to book it the date had already expired.

Not gone and said I'd given her a gift that was already expired so she couldn't use it but just didn't want to say anything to me.

As I said before, a month in the future may as well be out of date.

Really, you would need more than a month to just purely decide on a date? She had nine month to have the photography session done if she had wanted to get it done.

But again NOT THE ISSUE.

If I hadn't used a gift for what ever reason I would NEVER lie and make the person who had given me the gift feel bad.

If I hadn't used a gift for what ever reason I would NEVER lie and make the person who had given me the gift feel bad - (By making out it was their fault)

Goodness, you're getting really worked up. Maybe you shouldn't ask if you're being unreasonable if you're going to get do angry when people say, yes, you are.

I agree with others, I think your sister is mixed up/disorganised, rather than lying. And she hasn't made you look bad.

Sigh< Ok, your DS is being a complete bitch and clearly did it on purpose to be cruel and sadistic. I suggest you kick off big time and cease all further contact with her immediately

Erm .. I'm getting annoyed because people aren't seeing what I'm saying. They would rather slag off the gift I bought, call me tacky and thoughtless etc.

When in fact the gift is not the issue.

If it was me and I hadn't used it or by the time I came to use it, it was too late. I would not lie and say it had already expired when I was given it.

It sounds like you think she deliberately lied to make you feel bad. I would be upset about this.

However, from the information that you've given, it sounded like she lied to save upsetting you.

I appreciate that you're hurt and upset about this, but it honestly doesn't sound like something that your sister 'did' to you.

Maybe she knows what you're like and didn't want you to get all shouty, as you are doing on here?

Some people are slagging off the gift, but others aren't and have understood exactly what you're saying. You don't like their opinions either.
i would not have lied and said it had already expired
I don't think she lied. At least not on purpose.

But it does sound like you have issues with her, this really wouldn't be a big deal between me and my sister.

YABU because you are worked up over nothing.

Sorry, yellowsubmarine put it much more reasonably.

Are you this sensitive over everything?

Op you're getting awfully wound up over this, are you like this in RL too? If so that may be why she didn't want to say anything to you before, or told the white lie because she was afraid of your reaction if she told you she wasn't going to use it.

Just a thought....

"I'm getting annoyed because people aren't seeing what I'm saying. They would rather slag off the gift I bought, call me tacky and thoughtless etc."

Not everyone is. Several posters have said your sister is probably confused rather than "lying". But you don't seem to be considering that as a possibility?

Um it's a small white lie, I don't understand why you are so upset about it?! She probably thought it was better to say that than say she didn't like it/want to use it. She may even have tried to use it and been told it had expired without realising when the actual use by date actually was.

The fact you are getting so angry about such a small issue suggests you have issues with your sister that you may want to address.

Perhaps she was worried about the hard sell those type of companies do and therefore didn't want to have the photo done and rather than say that just used the expiry date as an excuse?

I agree with you op. The lie was nasty. I'd be hurt by it.

I'd probably tell her that the groupon hadn't expired when you gave her the gift. After all by not saying anything she's indirectly implied your present was useless when in fact you had put thought into it.

Well I would let it go. Either she lied (maybe thinking it was a white lie) which is a possibility and which I agree isnt very nice - even if she didnt like the gift, by saying to the OP that she had given her an out of date voucher she was adding insult to injury.

But the more likely alternative is that the sister genuinely did think it was out of date - she may have misread it or she was thinking back and just recalled a problem with dates - so she wasnt lying about it just was confused. So unless OP wants to cause further upset about this voucher, it is probably best to just let it go.
For what its worth, DH was given a photography voucher years ago and we did appreciate and use it so we dont all hate them!

I agree with you op. The lie was nasty. I'd be hurt by it.

I'd probably tell her that the groupon hadn't expired when you gave her the gift. After all by not saying anything she's indirectly implied your present was useless when in fact you had put thought into it.