to ask what the worst present you ever had was

[Justforlaughs]

When I first started seeing my now DH, he asked what I wanted for my birthday. I answered "nothing" and I got it! I've also been given a size 10 bikini (when I was a size 16), by a Great Aunt and a hose reel by my MIL. What strange things have you been given?

[bondigidum]

A radio pen... A foot spa, a nail dryer.. The pen takes the biscuit though.

[Swiddle]

Debobblifier for bobbly cardigans. From dh. Romantic... stares dreamily out of window

[TyrannosaurusBex]

A mouldy log mushroom-growing kit from DH. The year after that he gave me a tea towel, and after that an organic duvet the exact colour of dirt. At which point I threw a massive tantrum, and now I get nice presents which I pick myself

[MissCellania]

HQ gave me a map to Chat one year. Would you like one?

[cardamomginger]

DH and I were given herring for our wedding to be used at a party DH's parents were giving to celebrate our marriage.

We got married abroad, where most of DH's family lives. Friends clubbed together to buy a plane ticket for another friend who said she could not otherwise afford to attend. Lovely thought! Fantastic job everyone!! Except that said friend then used it as an opportunity to go on an extended holiday, staying in various hotels, booking internal flights and going on lots of excursions. For a variety of reasons, said freeloading friend is no longer my friend.

[helpyourself]

Green tights from MIL. I had to open them in front of DH, dbil and dsil. What do you say?

[EdgarAllanPond]

easy: aged 14, i had asked for jeans for xmas, but instead i got a pink velour jumpsuit - the kind an 80 year old would wear.

it had a massive heart on the top they thought i'd like.

they had at least kept the receipt, though were very huffy about it going back.

i was, apparently, impossible to please.

[CalamityJones]

A porcelain clown figurine. I'm not scared of clowns but ugly ornaments put the fear of god into me. It was from my mum. All a bit puzzling.

[helpyourself]

And then 2 years later, newly wed and pregnant, DH gave me a cheese grater for my birthday. Again I had to open in front of assorted friends.

[SomethingProfound]

A unisex garage for Christmas when I was 3 three, by my "you will not conform to typical gender roles" mother. I wanted a Barbie dream house, I was not impressed.

[moopoint]

I'm going to out myself here

iPod speaker

From Dp on my birthday, wrapped in a tesco bag. I already had an iPod station and I don't like angry birds.

[Eliza22]

A packet of three tea lights. From our best man a couple of years after the wedding. I had no idea what to say..... These 3 puny tea lights were wrapped really nicely too.

My son once got a tin of macaroons from his aunts (on ex husbands' side). They were dark chocolate in a little tin, with German writing on the side and a picture of an old house . He was 4 years old. Again, I was speechless.

[TheCeejOfWinterfell]

When I was thirteen - a tan corduroy trouser suit.

I can still feel the strain in my face from faking the smile.

[Eliza22]

Should say, he is their only nephew. And last year, aged 11 he got a bookmark. Wrapped up. I KNOW it's the thought that counts but, FFS!

[OnTheBottomWithAWomansWeekly]

My sister got a dictionary from our uncle for her wedding (not that long ago, she had a smartphone and laptop with spellcheck...)

[DublinMammy]

A charity goat. And I couldn't even curry it myself as, of course, someone else got it.... If you want to give to charity, give to charity, but don't call it my sodding Christmas present.....

[reasonstobecheerful]

A bashed up, dirty, crumpled, three years out of date sachet (yes just the sachet) of mulled wine mix from my former MIL. For Christmas.

[LaundryFairy]

When I was heavily pregnant, I came down on Christmas morning to find great big, unexpected box under tree! Oh my excitement! What was it?....

A bloody fecking juicer!!!!!

I have never, ever, ever expressed an interest in owning a juicer!!

DH, on the other hand, thought that it was a lovely idea .

Of course it sits in a cupboard covered in dust, and is now a by-word for unwanted presents chez LaundryFairy

[BuddyTheChristmasElf]

a massive painting! not to my taste at all, really awkward thing to receive as it wasn't going up on my wall, so you can't not offend the giver. And also was just the canvas so would have cost ££ to get stretched back onto wood to hang

and... bear with me on this one... wine! BUT BUT from someone who has known me for years and has never ever known me to drink a glass of the stuff, it's getting offensive at this point as they know I don't drink it! I say so at every opportunity now but still with the wrapped up bottles!

[Jins]

YY to wine!

FIL every birthday and Christmas turns up with a poorly wrapped bottle and says "It is white you prefer isn't it?" and I say "Oh Thanks, I don't drink wine, don't like it at all, but DH will enjoy it" and he says "Oh sorry, I forgot"

It's a game we play

[LisaMWill]

A pair of socks from my mil that had been split from a multi pack so she could give sil the other pair

[Lookingforthebrightside]

My DH once gave me at Xmas:
a CD and a bottle of radox tastefully presented in a Morrisons bag!!!

I spent all of Xmas day thinking that at some point my he will bring out my real present. He didn't.

Amazingly we are still married!

[zlist]

exDH bought me a book on cat behaviour (yes, I had a cat which I loved but I wasn't a 'cat' person)
DH bought me a cheap vinaigrette dispenser/oil drizzeler giftset thing from the card shop (I begged him to just stop buying me gifts after this one - it was the straw that broke the camel's back!)
exMIL - cat teatowels (the kind that don't really dry) and matching cat coaster set
MIL - picture in dark wood frame (doesn't match decor in our house at all) that we have been forced to hang ever since
SIL - top in a size 8 (her size) when I was a size 16

[SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius]

Dh once got a book on the toilets of Cornwall, from his dad. Ds3, aged 14, got a book on Cornish cheeses, and another one called The History of the Cornish Pasty for his birthday, again from dFIL.