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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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To be saddened by teenagers of today

343 replies

dinkybinky · 18/11/2012 16:09

Ive just been having a conversation with my niece. Apparently its the norm nowadays to "get with" (kiss)as many boys as possible at teenage parties. Parents even supply alcohol to 14/15 year olds.
Girls like this were called awful names if they behaved in such a way when I was at school, whats changed to make it acceptable?

OP posts:
AKissIsNotAContract · 18/11/2012 16:10

I'm 30 and this was certainly happening when I was a teenager.

AKissIsNotAContract · 18/11/2012 16:10

and why would you want to return to a time when girls were called awful names for exploring their sexuality?

GoldPlatedNineDoors · 18/11/2012 16:11

OP are you 80+?

If not, you just mixed in the wrong circles.

nocake · 18/11/2012 16:11

Please don't kid yourself that teenagers are any different now to when you were a kid. You might not have been in the groups that were snogging at parties but it was happening.

FromEsme · 18/11/2012 16:12

I'm 29 and the same thing happened when I was a teenager.

Personally I prefer not being called a slag because I had sex.

dinkybinky · 18/11/2012 16:12

14 year olds kissing 15 different boys in one night is okay, since when? Its awful

OP posts:
missymoomoomee · 18/11/2012 16:12

I'm 32 and this was happening when I was that age too.

whatatwat · 18/11/2012 16:13

why do you feel saddened by the teens when its the parents buying the booze?

HappyMummyOfOne · 18/11/2012 16:13

There will have always been girls like this but societies values have changed and so young girls see it as the norm. We no longer seem to encourage marriage, children outside strong long term relationships are seen as the norm, swapping
Artners frequently and poor parenting/instilling morals into children seems to have sadly passed many by.

coppertop · 18/11/2012 16:14

Well presumably the boys were doing the kissing too. Shouldn't they be called awful names too then?

Everlong · 18/11/2012 16:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OpheliaPayneAgain · 18/11/2012 16:16

If the object is to kiss as many of the opposite sex, regardless of whether you have an attraction to them, as some form of point scoring and popularity system - then it cheapens both sexes.

InNeedOfBrandy · 18/11/2012 16:17

So it's not ok in your mind that girls kiss boys but it's ok for the boys to kiss the girls? And you don't see anything wrong in that?

BoakFace · 18/11/2012 16:17

I'm 18 and I never did that Smile

You get the odd one but it's not everyone, and that happened in the old days too

BadgersBottom · 18/11/2012 16:17

Have you been living underground for the last century? The only thing different about now and then is that our parents didn't buy old alcohol - but things were different then and buying an industrial shitload of Woodpecker cider and 20 No6 presented no challenge to a 15 year old!

FromEsme · 18/11/2012 16:18

I do find it a bit off for parents to buy kids booze. Loads of parents bought us alcohol as teenagers - some of them got us properly pissed on vodka and stuff and they definitely never checked with my parents, because my mum would have done a cats bum mouth and never let me out again.

When I think some of the states I used to get in at that age, I find it a bit worrying.

GhostShip · 18/11/2012 16:20

We all did it. They were called 'meeting competitions' Blush

HecatePropylaea · 18/11/2012 16:20

What about the boys? I notice you are focusing on the girls kissing so many boys and how terrible that is.

They're not doing it by themselves. The boys are right there with their lips too. What awful names did they get called in your day?

And yes, teens have always done this sort of thing at parties. There was/is even a game - spin the bottle. That's fairly kissy Grin

If you want to be saddened by anyone - be saddened by the parents. Children don't raise themselves. So if you feel this behaviour is unacceptable - blame the parents Grin

Wink
dinkybinky · 18/11/2012 16:21

I just feel very sad for the boys and girls that are disrespecting themselves in this way. My DD is stunning, she had her first kiss when she was 19 AFTER she found someone she REALLY liked.

OP posts:
TheOneWithTheHair · 18/11/2012 16:21

I wouldn't be saddened on behalf of my teen thanks. He's been brought up to know that a bit of kissing doesn't do much harm but other things need to be thought through.

Both boys and girls have the responsibility to decide if they want to kids loads or no one. It's up to them to say yay or nay.

Yokel · 18/11/2012 16:21

47, so I am so far the oldest person on this thread who spent their early teenage years getting pissed out of my head and shagging snogging random boys.

But I'm sure there'll be older women along soon....

MrsDeVere · 18/11/2012 16:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

catgirl1976 · 18/11/2012 16:23

Of course she did OP

Of course she did :)

UnderwaterBasketWeaving · 18/11/2012 16:23

YABU to be "saddened by teenagers of today".

This is the normal teenage version of kiss chase. And although I'm not all that enamoured with teenagers drinking (even the 18 year olds! I'm a hypocrite) this does seem to be standard.

However, remember these same teenagers are wonderful vibrant enthusiastic people. I see around 150 teenagers a week, and they're all, without exception, surprising, aspirational, lovely people. (Give or take the odd "Kevin" moment and bad decision).

It's the grown-ups you've got to worry about...

dinkybinky · 18/11/2012 16:23

Theonewiththehair, One thing leads to another unfortunately, its probably why the UK has one of the highest teenage pregnancy rates in the world.

OP posts: