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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To tell a little porkie pie about DDs age

152 replies

KellyElly · 19/10/2012 21:39

DD was three today. I'm taking her to a place tomorrow where u pay ridiculous money when they are three. I am planning to say she's two as its just by a couple of days. I am very skint and this will mean I can get her some lunch out, a rise and an ice cream. Otherwise it will be the attraction and home. AIBU?

OP posts:
MustTidyPlayroom · 21/10/2012 14:59

I'm shocked that so many of you think this is ok. Calling it a "little porkie pie" doesn't make it sound any better either.

All it does is bump up the prices for everyone else and teach your children that lying is ok - When would you all say it's not ok? 2 and a half? 3?

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 21/10/2012 16:14

I bet that the OP, Zippeeee et al, who think that this sort of think is OK, would be a whole lot less happymif they were the ones being lied to or defrauded. What if an absent father lies about his income, in order to pay less maintenance - that's patently wrong, isn't it - but it is OK to defraud a company?

I'm sorry - shall I take my inconvenient truth off this thread, and leave the way open for those who think a little light lying and stealing is OK to reassure the OP - which is, after all, what she wants. She certainly doesn't want to hear the truth.

qo · 21/10/2012 16:15

to be honest playroom, my son can't even remember going to Marwell Zoo on his 3rd birthday, never mind the lying about his age bit(which he wasnt even aware of anyway) - he's 20 now believe it or not, doesn't think lying or stealing is ok

EdsRedeemingQualities · 21/10/2012 17:37

Yes qo but you do - as do so many others on here.

Have you asked your son's opinion on this thread?

It's so odd that loads of posters are saying, my child has grown up to think lying is wrong despite this.

And yet you're saying lying is FINE. [baffled]

D0G · 21/10/2012 17:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsSalvoMontalbano · 21/10/2012 17:46

Ds2 got used to being 'older' than his real age so he could do stuff his bro did - eg ice skating lessons etc, and was very good at remembering his 'pretend' age when asked. But we never pretended he was younger, as somehow seems more dishonest to do it just to save money.

EdsRedeemingQualities · 21/10/2012 17:52

If you're pretending a child is older to do a slightly risky activity, you could invalidate the place's insurance and get them into massive trouble.

McHappyPants2012 · 21/10/2012 17:53

Those type of places charge a fortune and you end up going into the gift shop and paying over the odds for tat.

I have no guilt at all about lying about the age

nametakenagain · 21/10/2012 17:53

Fare-evading. George Osbourne would be so proud Grin

EdsRedeemingQualities · 21/10/2012 17:57

If the prices are too high for you, and you think it's not worth it, why do you bother to go?

SamuelWestsMistress · 21/10/2012 18:04

I didn't do this with DD last summer when we went to Disneyland Paris. No way not us!

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 21/10/2012 18:21

Well - tesco charge too much for their food - is it OK if I come and steal some from you, McHappyPants?

Really - why is theft OK if you want something but can't afford it? I want some diamonds, but I can't afford them - does that make it Ok for me to steal them from a jeweller that has plenty of them and is charging the high prices that make the diamonds too expensive for me? I don't think it does, but maybe I am in some deluded minority.

Bunbaker · 21/10/2012 18:32

I suspect prices are higher than they should be to counter the number of people lying about their children's ages. A bit like shops inflating prices because of shop lifters.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 21/10/2012 19:44

I suspect you are right, Bunbaker.

qo · 21/10/2012 19:45

EdsRedeemingQualitie Yes I do remember it, but I was responding to the point that I'd "taught my son that lying is ok""

I didn't really teach him that from that one incident as he can't even remember being there!!

Original poster
KellyElly · 21/10/2012 19:48

I'm sorry - shall I take my inconvenient truth off this thread, and leave the way open for those who think a little light lying and stealing is OK to reassure the OP - which is, after all, what she wants. Oh so you now assume you know what I want. Funny I thought I was posting in AIBU to gauge peoples opinions on this. Being that I'm an adult I would have made my own choice on the matter anyway validation or not. Plese do feel free to keep telling me what I think though.

OP posts:
DeepPurple · 21/10/2012 19:59

I wouldn't lie. I just couldn't do it. It's dishonest.

Tonight we went out for a meal and they forgot to charge for my glass of wine. We told them and paid for it.

However, we stayed in a posh hotel once and had an evening meal, lots of drinks etc. when it came to check out they had missed off most off the drinks, starters and desserts. This would have totalled around £150. We pointed the mistake out to them for then to curtly advise us they don't make mistakes Shock oh we'll, their loss Grin

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 21/10/2012 20:04

Oh, I am sorry, KellyElly - I must have missed the point where you accepted that lying about your child's age might be wrong.

ilovesooty · 21/10/2012 20:08

The fact that it's only one day seems to be muddying the waters a bit. I don't much care for the phrase "a little porkie pie" either. If it's a lie, it's a lie, and in principle I think it's wrong.

Original poster
KellyElly · 21/10/2012 21:02

SDT and sorry I must have missed the point in posting in AIBU that I have to accept your point of view? AIBU - the majority of posters say no but you and the minority say yes so that's the point of view I should accept. Not really how it works Hmm

OP posts:
OhlimpPricks · 21/10/2012 21:03

I tree with musttidyplayroom , it is dishonesty. And calling it 'a little porkie pie' sounds like a naughty child trying to be sly and avoid punishment.
Do you go into A supermarket and 'borrow' things by slipping them in your bag?
I'm no saint, and am in no position to judge, but I try to treat others as I would would want to be treated.
I wouldn't like people to lie to, and steal from me, which is essentially what someone is doing when they knowingly evade payment.

OhlimpPricks · 21/10/2012 21:04
  • I agree
nametakenagain · 21/10/2012 21:15

qo - eds was making the point that you think it's ok to lie about a child's age but you also say your grown-up son "doesn't think lying or stealing is okay". Which seems inconsistent.

Original poster
KellyElly · 21/10/2012 21:17

Ok to the people still posting. I asked the day before I took DD. We have been I decided not to pay for her. Its done. Thank you for your input on both side but its all heindsight now. As I have posted O don't feel guilty, I was skint because of things out of my control, its not something I make a habit of (otherwise why would I be posting here asking about it). This is a discussion about something that has already happened. The end.

OP posts:
GoldenGreen · 21/10/2012 21:17

It's stealing, so whether you believe you are unreasonable or not just depends on whether you think stealing is ok in certain circumstances. I have to say I don't think these circumstances warrant it.

Clearly a lot of people think it's ok though - I have twice been let off ds' bus fare by bus drivers who clearly thought I was mad for telling them his real age (he passes for much younger).