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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to have sobbed my heart out at work today because I shouldn't have to do this

484 replies

caniscantanymore · 17/10/2012 20:53

I'm a vet. Some details changed or omitted for anonymity purposes and because I'll get flamed for this.

Today a man brought his dog in to me.

The dog was a large, boisterous adolescent puppy. He hurtled into the room, bouncing up to me excitedly, wagging his tail all the time and nudging at my hand with his muzzle. His big squishy paws crashed against my chest each time he paused to greet me, as he bounded around the room investigating all the smells. He was an unusual cross, very striking to look at and obviously a bright and energetic dog. He was adorable.

The history went like this:

The dog had been bought as a tiny puppy by a couple who were told it was a "designer" cross between two specific small breeds. Now, if the people who bought this puppy had had the slightest inkling about what they were doing it would have been immediately obvious to them that this was most certainly not a cross between two small breeds. But anyway, they didn't have a clue so they bought the cute little puppy from this dubious source (probably at a cost of several hundred pounds) and took it back to their family home, complete with toddler.

The dog grew a bit and it became clear that it was actually going to be really big. It was bouncy, energetic and destructive. It kept racing around and knocking over their small child. So they rehomed it to a family member.

The family member also had children but they were slightly bigger children. The family member really wanted to do the right thing, so they tried to "discipline" the dog. The dog began to show occasional signs of aggression and was completely hyperactive in the home, destructive and unmanageable. I was not surprised to hear this, since it was obvious to me from this dog's heritage that it was the sort of dog which had significant needs in terms of exercise and stimulation. In an attempt to magically resolve the issues the family member had the dog neutered. Which unsurprisingly made no difference.

Today the dog was brought in to be put to sleep. It had growled very aggressively when a child had put its face near his, and between this and an imminent change in circumstances the family member felt unable to manage the dog any more. He had tried local and national rescue organisations, all of which were full. He had nobody to care for the dog overnight tonight. He was not able to take the dog home, partly because of safety concerns and partly because the decision had been taken together as a family that it was the right thing to do.

So I put this healthy, affectionate, vibrant dog to sleep while it munched on treats and the third owner in its short life cried into his fur. Then when it was just me and the body of this poor puppy I had a good old cry myself.

I know there will be people who think I was right to put down a dog who has shown any signs of aggression under any circumstances. I disagree.

I know there will be people who think I was wrong to put down a dog when I could have taken it and found it a new home. I disagree.

I also know that there will be many many people who have no idea that this is happening all the time in this country because of irresponsible ignorant greedy people, selling dogs to irresponsible ignorant feckless people, who then pass them on to naive and thoughtless "rescuers" who eventually get to the end of their tether and bring them to me for euthanasia. All the time.

These are the dogs who bite children in the home due to a total lack of knowledge, reasonable expectations and effort to socialise them adequately.

These are the dogs whose owners can afford four figure sums to buy the latest random mongrel "breed" with a stupid made-up name, but cannot afford fifty quid to get it vaccinated, far less any money at all to treat even minor illnesses.

These are the dogs who clog up rescue centres all over the country, waiting along with thousands and thousands of others for the home with no children, no other pets and eight-foot fences, with an owner who has experience of managing behavioural problems, works from home, has stainless steel furniture and can write blank cheques to pay for the inherited illnesses the dog suffers from. Homes which don't actually exist.

These are the dogs who I have to put down because I know that it is more responsible of me to painlessly take their life than to condemn them to wait with the rest of the enormous population of "difficult" dogs sitting in rescue kennels all over the country.

Please, please, I implore you. Get advice before you take on a dog - from a vet, a qualified positive behaviourist, the Kennel Club, the Blue Cross, the Dog's Trust, the RSPCA - the information is there for the taking, there is no excuse. Go to a decent breeder, who has a waiting list, or a rescue centre which really grills you thoroughly before matching you with a pet. Find out how to bring your puppies up properly so if you do find your circumstances change then at least they are rehomable. Make sure you can afford to pay for the unexpected. Make sure your expectations are fair.

Please, because I can't keep having to do this :(

OP posts:
LFCisTarkaDahl · 18/10/2012 17:46

Your dog shouldn't have had pups, it's that simple.

You haven't given ONE reason why you think its ok your dog had pups - and that's because no responsible dog owner lets their dog have pups.

It's just completely unnecessary with the tens of thousands of dogs without homes.

It's utterly shocking to me that you are calling the vet irresponsible, you have no evidence for that. And the comment that she killed it 'at the drop of a hat' is just pure nastiness and there's no justification for your sly, hectoring, nasty tone to the OP.

pigletmania · 18/10/2012 17:49

Too right LFC flatbread should look closer to home before passing judgement

D0oinMeCleanin · 18/10/2012 17:52

No the dog wouldn't have been unhomable Piglet, there are homes and foster homes out there, the difficulty is in finding a home that is not already dealing with the last dog who was left untrained and badly handled and given up because of 'aggression'

Homes and rescue can be found for almost any dogs no matter how bad their behaviour issues are. No dog is un savable, the issue is there are just too many dogs like this to have the perfect foster home just lined up ready and waiting for when the vet calls and most owners are not willing to wait for a space to be found or to become to available.

Jins · 18/10/2012 17:53

Flatbread here's a link to the Vet's Code of Conduct

www.rcvs.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/code-of-professional-conduct-for-veterinary-surgeons/

This is an important bit

On occasions, the professional responsibilities in the Code may conflict with each other and veterinary surgeons may be presented with a dilemma.

In such situations, veterinary surgeons should balance the professional responsibilities, having regard first to animal welfare.

The OP set out exactly one of these dilemmas. First regard has to be given to animal welfare. It does not say preserve life.

I couldn't give a fig how many puppies you've bred or how wonderful your dogs are and I have no interest in bullying anyone. However you are arguining a case that does not exist. Attacking the veterinary profession in this case is just stupid

Blackballoon · 18/10/2012 17:53

flatbread so you bred your dog and then rehomed them via a rescue centre? How is that being a responsible owner? No matter what you say, you have added to the problem. So you didn't take payment for them? So what! You still added dogs to the system. Hypocrite.

JaxTellerIsMyFriend · 18/10/2012 17:58

dooin I have had kennels built outside for emergency dogs that cant come in the house... havent had to use them yet - apart from when I am floor washing for my 2, oh and the cat has taken residence in there as it is warm and cosy.

I know that I will have to, am dreading that day, because it means all other available foster families cant/wont take a risky dog.

D0oinMeCleanin · 18/10/2012 18:04

I don't have the space to do that Jax, I am the idiot who lets them into my house Grin

I don't take truly dangerous dogs because I have children and a cat, but I am willing to work with the ones who others class as dangerous like the puppy who will bite you if you grab it's collar (just take the collar off you numpty) I would happily take in a dog like the one OP, but my home has no room atm.

achillea · 18/10/2012 18:07

Jins I'm thinking of a way to prevent the youths hanging about with dangerous dogs and don't know how to handle them - a 21 year age limit would prevent them owning dogs. On the other hand a lot of them get a lot of love from their dogs that they don't get from anyone else. I have heard them saying that it gets them out of the house etc, so I'm backing off the minimum age idea now! But someone has to take responsibility for the dogs 'owned' by under 21s.

Jins · 18/10/2012 18:07

We've kept every animal we've taken in so far Blush

Flatbread · 18/10/2012 18:10

Dooing, I am not blaming one person. But a system which allows a young, healthy dog to be so easily put down. OP said he was adorable and had no real behavioural issues, clearly a dog who could be rehomed to an experienced owner.

I think I just object to a mentality which says dogs are commodities, and vets who kill healthy pets are perpetuating that belief, whether they like it or not.

In the US, for example, if you want an abortion, in our area, atleast, the doctor will have multiple sessions to make sure that is the right decision (I know this because a friend had to make a difficult decision regarding a foetus with heart problems). This is because there is no clear answer and a decision to kill cannot be taken lightly.

Why can't our code of conduct for pets require at least some level of counselling or advice? Say that you need to have a three day reflection period, contact dog support groups, before you can kill a healthy dog?

Why kill within a 20 minute meeting...surely a living being deserves more consideration than that? Sad

SabrinaMulhollandJjones · 18/10/2012 18:15

Flatbread, you have the cheek to criticise the op when you are one of the irresponsible breeders who contribute to the problem. That is hypocritical. In fact I don't think I've ever read anything more hypocritical on MN.

D0oinMeCleanin · 18/10/2012 18:20

Finally something we agree on Shock

The system is bollocks. This country's whole attitude to dog ownership and welfare is bollocks. Things need to change.

I just wish I knew a simple way to change things because I honestly do not think that simply telling vets to longer kill healthy dogs is the right way. I would worry about 'backstreet' vets setting up to fill the gap.

LaQueen · 18/10/2012 18:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LtEveDallas · 18/10/2012 18:22

Yep, I'm probably unpleasant, I accept that. I'm afraid I am infuriated that Flatbread posts, forgetting all her previous behaviours.

Flatbread, you may well have had a point on this thread, but your past posts, your previous actions, your posting of the opposition view on numerous DH threads means that your point gets lost. I see you as nothing more than someone who holds grudges and purposely stirs up trouble and derails threads. That is my personal view.

I don't believe or choose to listen to your posts on this thread because I am not convinced you actually hold those views - I believe your previous postings have been opposing views for the sake of it, so I cannot take you seriously. Ever heard of the boy who cried Wolf?

Your puppies are relevant to this thread because it is people allowing their dogs to breed 'accidentally' that help to endanger other dogs. Can you not see that?

Blackballoon · 18/10/2012 18:22

Lovely idea flatbread but the situation in this country is just out of control. People don't give a shit about animals. They beat them, starve them, dump them on the side of the road.....

It needs to start at the beginning of the chain with the people breeding these dogs and people realising what they are taking on. We can save as many dogs as possible but it isn't going to stop the problem.

A vet saying no to euthanasing a dog is not going to help the situation. It's a sad fact I'm afraid.

ToothbrushThief · 18/10/2012 18:23

Why do dog threads bring out the very worst in some people. Breeding more dogs when we have so many dogs without homes is hard to justify.

NapaCab · 18/10/2012 18:23

If the vets don't put 'problem' dogs to sleep then owners who don't know any better will take matters into their own hands but be less kind about it.

I grew up in a rural area and pets were less common, most dogs were working farm dogs. There was no local RSPCA equivalent or rescue home although there was a pound for strays. If a dog or cat had a litter with no home for the pups/kittens, they would often just be drowned in a river. When paddling with a friend in a local river once, we saw the dead bodies of some Golden Retriever puppies float by. That's the kind of thing people will resort to if vets don't provide the service of humane euthanasia.

The solution really is to stop irresponsible breeding and stop portraying pet ownership as something anyone can do, regardless of the dog or owner's lifestyle.

honeytea · 18/10/2012 18:26

I feel like the purpose of a dog is to be a companion to a human or a working dog, if there is no human that wants/needs tge dog and that leads to the dog being put to sleep I can see it is a waste of life but not any worse than if you buy a chicken and don't cook it in time and throw it away. A dog is only an animal, they are not people, I don't understand why there is a more emotive reaction to a wasted dogs life than a wasted chickens life. I understand that people live their dog but that dog was not your dog it was just a dog.

In a world where children die everyday because of dirty water it amazes me that people worry about the death of an unloved dog.

crazyhatlady · 18/10/2012 18:29

I don't really get why this particular case is so upsetting, op mentioned this dog had shown 'occasional aggressive tendencies'. At least these owners had the decency to have the dog pts in a humane manner, there will be many who will simply deal with it themselves rather than stumping up the cash.

Incidentally there are way more animals pts due to owners not being able to afford vet fees than any other reason.

pigletmania · 18/10/2012 18:42

Now I agree Wth you flatbread but the op is not the only vet doing this, its quite widespread. People should hav a licence to own a dog

Flatbread · 18/10/2012 18:47

i think people who have children, especially multiple children are incredibly selfish and irresponsible. Your children are a problem. , endangering and killing other children by hogging up our shared resources. god knows we have enough overcrowding on our planet.

So don't go around hypocritically about my dogs. i find it offensive that anyone can dismiss our pups as a problem. They are not a fucking object, they are living beings bringing joy to families who were ethical enough to wait for them, instead of going to a breeder

Probably a lot more joy to others than your equally unnecessary children, I might add Smile

nancerama · 18/10/2012 18:49

YANBU. Some stupid irresponsible idiot advertised her 8 week old Springer Spaniel for sale on our NCT Facebook page this week. She didn't realise that it would be too much hard work looking after a puppy and a baby... What the hell was the breeder doing allowing them to take a dog they had no clue how to care for?

pigletmania · 18/10/2012 18:50

We wiypuld love a dog but not til our young children are teens, we have to do a lot of reasarch into the breed of dog. Prbably get one from a rescue.

HoneyDragon · 18/10/2012 18:54

Right the threads got to that ridiculous point where dogs and children are compared.

Men, Women and children are butchered and murdered every day. Because some people think that's ok. Then the people who try and stop these atrocities are called baby murderers, and professional killers.

Dogs, Cats and Horses and other valuable worthwhile animals are butchered everyday because some people think that happens everyday. The people who try and stop these atrocities are called zealots and /or murderers depending on which organisation they work for.

But at least the zealots and the baby murderers are bloody trying to do SOMETHING.

One person has posted on this thread and said they are not going to have puppies, so that's something.

NO LIVING CREATURE IS UNNECESSARY. But that doesn't stop the being treated that way.

you can be for dogs and humans.

HoneyDragon · 18/10/2012 18:58

^apols for ranty spelling/grammar mistakes I'm sure you get the gist