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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to be uncomfortable with toddler's key worker smoking

87 replies

Stokey · 11/10/2012 15:05

Dd1she(3 next month) has just started a new nursery. When I went to drop her off today about 10 this morning, her key worker was having a fag outside. She dropped it as soon as she saw us but I feel a bit uncomfortable with a smoker looking after my child. AIBU?

OP posts:
TheDetective · 11/10/2012 15:07

The only time I would feel uncomfortable with this is if I ever caught a whiff of stale smoke smell on my child, or she wasn't following the recommendations for waiting 20 minutes after a cigarette, changing clothing, washing hands etc.

If she does then I'd let it go.

squoosh · 11/10/2012 15:08

YABU.

It's not as if she'll be smoking in the presence of your child and any residual smoke on her clothes, breath really isn't going to do any harm to a three year old. Worry about the fumes from the traffic, much more likely to cause health issues.

Kennyp · 11/10/2012 15:09

i hate the smell of smoke. it loiters for ages and is horrid for non smokers and children (especially if the children are non smokers, ho ho)

i am also very uncomfortable with it ... people who work with/near children smoking.

GoldShip · 11/10/2012 15:09

YABU

What exactly do you think is going to happen?

All sorts of people are smokers. Teachers, doctors, nurses, dentists, shop keepers, farmers...

As long as she isn't smoking near your child I don't see a problem.

I'm an ex smoker by the way!

Portofino · 11/10/2012 15:09

What do you think will happen for Christ's sake? Will your PFB go up in a puff of smoke?

MrsTerryPratchett · 11/10/2012 15:10

Poor cow. Yet another example of people who have 'responsible' jobs not being able to have lives and having to be perfect even outside their work.

HKat · 11/10/2012 15:11

Like others have said, unless dd came home stinking of smoke it wouldn't bother me.

usualsuspect3 · 11/10/2012 15:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Sirzy · 11/10/2012 15:15

Ds has asthma which makes him very sensitive to cigarette smoke but even I wouldn't object to a member of nursery staff smoking, as long as they don't smoke when children are around does it matter?

One of the nurses who treated Ds when he was in HDU smoked didn't stop her doing a fantastic job though!

missymoomoomee · 11/10/2012 15:18

You obviously haven't noticed the smell of smoke on her before, you only know because you saw her. Is she supposed to list every habit and hobby she has to make sure parents approve of what she does in her spare time?

I hate smoking but I can't see how it makes a difference to how she cares for your child.

FreePeaceSweet · 11/10/2012 15:20

Its absolutely none of your business.

YerMaw1989 · 11/10/2012 15:22

What? are you for real?

I very much doubt she will be puffing away inside the nursery or whatever.

oh dear :/. YABU

TheDetective · 11/10/2012 15:25

For the record, I don't think YABU though, because I'd be uncomfortable with the idea too. But as I posted above, I'd not do anything unless I could smell it on my child, or she wasn't following recommendations for caring for children/second hand smoke.

Curlybrunette · 11/10/2012 15:29

I was told once (can't remember where tho) that a smoker should change all their clothes and wait 20 minutes before going near non smokers to avoid the harmful effects of passive smoking. If the key worker was stood outside the nursery then the chances are she would be going striaght back in to work.
Potentially harmful chemicals still be around.

Just googled it and found this study:
www.liv.ac.uk/haccru/reports/ps_final_report.pdf

Says here the smoker breathes out the chemicals for 20 minutes, and stays on clothes for 2 hours.

I don't think YABU

Sirzy · 11/10/2012 15:32

She could easily have been at the start of a 20 minute break. Wear a coat and wash your hands after - where is the issue?

TheDetective · 11/10/2012 15:33

Curly That is why I said about following the recommendations to reduce the risk of second hand smoke. I think if she is on a break she should have enough time to do those? But I'm guessing she probably just puts a coat on over her clothes, which to me wouldn't be enough to reduce the risks.

JustSpiro · 11/10/2012 15:37

I'd be bit Hmm at her smoking right outside the nursery,

JustSpiro · 11/10/2012 15:39

...trigger happy on the keyboard - sorry...

...purely because it doesn't set a great example and I'd be surprised they don't have something in their policy about it.

Otherwise YABU as what she does away from the children is her business.

shrimponastick · 11/10/2012 15:39

I have posted about this matter previously.

I live next door to a nursery - the majority of the staff smoke, and tend to either hang out near the back entrance (on the street, off premises) or walk up and down the street past my window.

I am sure they don't go in and change their outfits before going near the children. They don't wear coats (probably will do soon as the weather gets colder).

It's just not very nice.

MadgeHarvey · 11/10/2012 15:39

God yeah - the Nursery might think it's big and clever and then - Gosh -the whole building might decide to go for a crafty fag. It's probably bigger than the bike shed though so where it would go is a problem.

YABU, just by the way, for all and more of the reasons stated above.

shrimponastick · 11/10/2012 15:39

YANBU. I forgot that bit.!

Snusmumriken · 11/10/2012 15:40

YANBU

thirdhand smoke

HappyJoyful · 11/10/2012 15:40

Quick take the child out of the nursery.. how dare she smoke (in her break time one would assume) goodness, she might even enjoy a glass of wine too in the evenings, next she'll be injecting heroin in the nursery toilets.
Seriously, seriously YABU

ClippedPhoenix · 11/10/2012 15:41

Oh for god sake OP, get a grip. She won't be puffing away whilst in the nursery looking after your daughter.

DystopianReality · 11/10/2012 15:42

There is a big difference in 2nd hand smoke (passive smoking, ie smoke breathed in from someone else's cigarette in a confined space) and 'breathing out chemicals' for 20 minutes afterwards. Just because you do that doesn't mean there is any risk to other people you are dealing with.

Smoking outside during her break doesn't stop her from doing her job well does it?

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