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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want my children to take part in trick or treating?

293 replies

ValerieDavis · 09/10/2012 16:18

Coming to that dreaded time of year again ... Halloween.

I've fairly strict with my children's diets and I really do not want to take them trick or treating this year. All those sugary sweets are no good for their teeth.

I've spoken with DH about this and he thinks that they've only young once and it's only for one night but the sweets tend to last a couple of weeks and I'm doing it for their own good.

I'm more than happy to buy them costumes and let them dress up and have fun on the day and will let them have a few sweets, just no trick or treating!

AIBU?

OP posts:
CelineMcBean · 09/10/2012 18:19

We never get anyone. I think because the first year here we gave out satsumas.

We've obviously been black listed. Shame.

BegoniaBampot · 09/10/2012 18:20

YouMay - isn't there room for both? Sure some folk having a crowd of Carol singers coming to your door asking for money might not welcome it. Don't see the difference really, only with Halloween you can knock at doors that are decorated and obviously joining in the fun.

WorraLiberty · 09/10/2012 18:20

Ahh sorry bureni, I got the wrong end of the stick and thought you were saying it was ok Blush

WildThongyoumakemyringsting · 09/10/2012 18:21

celine fruit!
Heaven forfend

BegoniaBampot · 09/10/2012 18:22

Celine - know how you feel. Used to give out apples and monkey nuts and used to get some strange looks! Tis all about the sweets these days!

GhostofMammaTJ · 09/10/2012 18:22

YABU. My DP takes my DC to houses where they have decorated for halloween. We decorate our house. We live on a small estate where every one knows every one, so they do only go to people we know. I stay at home and answer the door to all who knock and really enjoy it.

The sweets they get last longer than two weeks here, because I really do ration them. Grin

bureni · 09/10/2012 18:26

worra no need to apologise, this typing lark aint what its cracked up to be lol.

Viviennemary · 09/10/2012 18:28

YABU. Halloween is great fun for kids. I'm a misery at times but even I don't mind kids trick or treating.

marjproops · 09/10/2012 18:30

OP, YANBU. Havent had time to read all the posters but mine doesnt for religious reasons. also, I agree with the strangers things, after all thats happened this year on the news to let your kids go out alone (this is not for the children who are accompanied by an adult btw) and knock on strangers doors. also what about the elderly etc? giving them a fright...not a good idea. stupid thing came from america and like another poster i wish it would go back, along with high school proms and the 'talk to the hand cos the face aint listening ' thing!!''BTW I genuinly love America, just not these things!!

Way2Go · 09/10/2012 18:31

Let them trick or treat but tell them you will be swapping the sweets for a present plus a few sweets.
My, now teenage, DC's always loved Halloween. It was their favourite holiday. (we used to live in Canada). The 'trick or treat' part ofthe day is the best bit. It would be a shame if your DC's had to miss out.

My DC's ate a few sweets when they got home and I would bin the rest. I really don't see any issue with this.

Way2Go · 09/10/2012 18:37

Our street used to trick or treat when I was a kid which was a loooooooong time ago. old as in dinosaurs, cavemen, etc

Where we live now (UK) a lot of the local DC's go trick or treating. The DC's only go to houses that are participating in Trick or Treating (they display a poster) It's very adorable and friendly.

DisappointedHorse · 09/10/2012 18:45

Personally I think YABU, kids love Halloween and it won't hurt them to have a few sweets. Just ration them. Trick or treating may not be a long lived tradition over here but it's rapidly becoming one. I used to go 30 years ago and these days I wear white contact lenses to work!

I believe in moderation it's fine, as opposed to my friend who was banned from ever having anything sweet because her Dad had a fear of her getting fat. As soon as she had any money in her pocket she spent it all on sweets and went mad, even in her twenties.

I accompany my children trick or treating. We only go to the houses that are decorated and they have a ball. I don't even mind the teenagers as long as they're dressed up. And I love pumpkin carving!

KitchenandJumble · 09/10/2012 18:49

I love Halloween and trick-or-treating! My childhood and adolescence were split between the U.S. and the U.K., and I saw the rise of trick-or-treating in the U.K. When we first arrived in London, it was unheard of, and I remember regaling my school friends with tales of the delights of Halloween. I guess they weren't the only ones who thought it sounded like fun, and over the years it seemed to increase in popularity. Even in my teenage years, it was still quite rare in England though starting to become popular.

I think it's a lovely tradition, and I don't honestly see how it could be truly detrimental to a child's health to collect a few sweets once a year. To ban trick-or-treating on those grounds seems mean to me. I respect the fact that some people have religious objections to Halloween, but the "Oh, horrors, too much sugar" reasoning doesn't make much sense to me.

bureni · 09/10/2012 18:50

When I was young we would meet up with other families along with my grandparents at a bonfire on the lough shore, there was a small raft built with a lit torch in the middle to which everyone put some food on normally vegetables, fruit or maybe a barley sheaf. Once the raft was full it was pushed out into the lough on the outgoing tide, whether or not it was some old pagan/celtic tradition associated with Halloween (Samhain)I am unsure as I have not seen it done for years.

BegoniaBampot · 09/10/2012 18:55

HALLOWEEN was imported to America by Scots (perhaps Irish as well) immigrants. It's been about in one form or other for centuries. It's not a new thing and it's not from America.

bureni · 09/10/2012 18:57

I think people were referring to the trick or treat part not Halloween itself

exoticfruits · 09/10/2012 19:16

I never let mine do it-I hate it. We used to try and be away for the night. It may not have originated in America but the present form comes from there.
We didn't have it as a child. I have nothing against dressing up and parties-I just loath the trick and treating.

exoticfruits · 09/10/2012 19:17

I am also not against DCs having sweets but they do not need the obscene amount they collect.

exoticfruits · 09/10/2012 19:17

I don't see why we couldn't have Halloween without any trick or treating.

MaryZed · 09/10/2012 19:21

Trick or treating has been done in Ireland for generations, bureni, since my grandparents time at least (a long, long time ago). Here it is groups of primary age children going house to house in their own estates, to the parents of other children who are also going house to house.

And 14 year olds in balaclavas demanding money is NOT trick or treating.

I solved the sweet business by letting them eat as much as they could that night and then eating the rest myself disposing of the rest, rather than having sweets around for weeks.

JustSpiro · 09/10/2012 19:24

YANBU - I loathe the idea of trick or treat, albeit I'm not bothered about the sugar aspect, just find the idea of encouraging kids to go out and knock on strangers doors begging for sweets very Hmm.

We'll probably do dress up, face painting, pumpkin carvingand all the rest at home, maybe with a couple of DD's friends round, but trick or treat is off the menu.

I really hope she's never invited to do it with another family as I would feel like a killjoy saying 'no' but I really wouldn't be happy about her going - it's just something I'm really uncomfortable with tbh.

BegoniaBampot · 09/10/2012 19:26

Exotic. - what to you is Halloween without trick or treating? We do as I have always done it, dress up and go round the neighbours houses. Only difference is where we are now, no one earns their goodies or treats by entertaining the occupier with a song, joke, poem etc as that seems to be a Scottish thing.

bureni · 09/10/2012 19:29

Mary, trick or treating only came to the British isles during the 1960s at the earliest, it is an American take on Halloween as is the pumpkins, I never mentioned anything about 14 year olds with balaclavas demanding money. I have never ever seen anyone trick or treating in Ireland in my life and I have lived all over the country.

exoticfruits · 09/10/2012 19:31

I wouldn't mind one or two, but the whole evening is disrupted by knocks on the door. A few 6yr olds at 6pm who are all excited by being out in the dark is fine but not a group of teenagers at 9pm with a bin bag and a mask between them!
12 yrs should be the absolute cut off point.
I make homemade toffee and am waiting for a DC to say 'I am not allowed to take unwrapped sweets from strangers' so that I can say 'well why are you knocking on stranger's doors then!' They always really like it-and it is much better for them.
It was never an English thing.

DisappointedHorse · 09/10/2012 19:32

What about guising? Isn't that the same thing and has been going on for hundreds of years?