Children smoking in the park

[TheHeirOfSlytherin]

Dh and I took ds to the "naice" park this afternoon simply because the other nearby park has a skatepark attached and the surrounding area can be littered with glass and worse.

While we were there a group of 4 or 5 11-13 year olds turned up, monopolised the toddler swings and started smoking. Dh saw this and shouted over to them to "Clear off if you want to smoke, this is a kiddy's park." and one by one they slunk off.

The park was busy, lots of families with small children around but when the smokers turned up they all just moved away from them to the other end of the park.

It left me thinking, was dh bu? I don't think he was, had I seen the smokers before him then I would have said something too. The actions of the other parents makes me think we're in the minority.

Op.... This will be your own dc one day you know! Having adults shouting at them .... You're ok with that then?

Why don't you all think children smoking is abhorrent? This is completely mental, you're all so concerned with how those poor little children were treated by dh and not by the fact that were doing something wrong?

Would your DH have shouted at someone his own age who was smoking, another parent perhaps? If not, he sounds like a bully. If so, he sounds very aggressive.

If my dc are smoking underage then yes I expect every adult that sees them doing it to shout at them!

children always smoke, that is not a good thing, but I really don't thing this precious-aggressive dad was concerned about their health.

I have already answered that question Agent.

*think

If they were shooting up if would have been ever sadder...like you've already said, they were children.

I once went over to a teenage girl who'd got out a big marker pen and was about to graffiti some nice wooden play equipment. I said "Do you think it's nice for the little kids when people write on the play equipment." She looked guilty put the pen away, and walked off.

Sorry - I see that you said he'd have ignored adults smoking. So, a bullly then.

I'm really anti-smoking these days, and even if my DC smoked I wouldn't shout...lecture, yes, but not shout. And apparently (according to DS1) I'm a shouty mum.

Op why are you getting so worked up?

They are experimenting, it's what kids do! Most likely they realise it's disgusting and totally unaffordable and ditch it pretty quickly! You and your DH sound very odd. Think about it a bit. Also, how did your ds feel about his fathers little anger display?

He is not a bully. As I said before, had an adult been smoking on the children's play equipment he would have done the same. Had the kids been smoking elsewhere in the park he couldn't have cared less.

You lot are unbelievable.

So, your DH generally shouts at people to "clear off" when they do something he doesn't like near him?

we are unbelievable?

I'm getting worked up because I come on here asking if confronting them was wrong only to be told that it's ok for them to smoke anywhere they want because it's always happened. Since when is that ok?

we are unbelievable? Sorry if we didn't all cheer at some kids being shouted off a park

Yes, your DH was BU. It sounds like he took advantage of their age to shout at them. I doubt he would have done it to adults or to younger who were doing something he disapproved of. Teenagers are fair game though, aren't they? It's fine to intimidate them apparently...

Making a polite request would have had the same effect, I'm sure.

Actually I think your Dh was not being U but being responsible. They were in a park that wasn't for them, it was for toddlers... they weren't really the target audience. Smoking or not, it's not a park for them.

Had they been sitting on a random bench, a silent tut to himself would have been enough, but they were monopolising the toddler play area and had no right to be there. Smoking or not.

I'm a smoker. I've been a teen. I've hung out and been told to move on, and when its a fair point, it's a fair point. Your DH was reasonable.

I actually think the lack if a simple 'clear off' from elders is sorely missed. I speak as someone who used to hang out anywhere I could... I'd have more respect for your DH op than the many sniffy types who give disapproving looks and tut tut without having the balls to actually say "this is a toddler park, clear off!".

You felt you had to start a thread..... Why? If you are so sure your DH was right then why the need to gather further opinion?

Sorry OP. I was a bit aggressive. But you didn't seem that open minded about hearing what people thought, though your first post did.

It was just your comment about smoking therefore shouting that pissed me off.

No, you're being told that your DH shouting at them to clear off was wrong. Had he spoken civilly to them, you'd be getting different responses. And I think it is bullying for an adult to shout at 11-13 year olds.

I am a teenager, and I do think I deserve to be intimidated from time to time-when there's a need for it! you lot are older, we need to be put in our place, end of. But shouting for something like this- really?