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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think DS will die?

88 replies

Flojo1979 · 01/10/2012 16:32

Ok so he's perfectly healthy normal 7 yo.
And I've always been pessimistic about stuff, like every time I get on a plane I wonder will this be the one to fall out of the sky, I won't go on fair rides etc cos I'm convinced MY cart will derail etc.
Balanced with that tho, I dont worry when I get behind the wheel of my car.
Anyway, DS is having an operation tomorrow just a simple routine thing, but I can't help thinking what if, what if, what if and what if he doesn't wake up etc.
I know I'm being unreasonable but I need a bit of hand holding! I'm a single mum so I don't have a DH to hold my hand so pls will someone be the voice of reason!

OP posts:
ListenToYourHeart · 01/10/2012 19:39

Hand holding Smile

I'm sure it will all be ok, get some chocolate in so when you are both home you can curl up and watch a film together on the sofa x

jollymary · 01/10/2012 19:48

Can really sympathise, my DS (9) had an op in July, was so hard but all went well, really would recommend taking a chatty friend with you to distract you whilst you are waiting during the op. All the very best xxx

thebody · 01/10/2012 19:50

Op, your dh will be in very safe hands, it is a planned routine operation and you most definatly will be able to stay with him until he is anaesthetised.

As an ex theatre nurse we always wanted mum or dad there as child obviously more relaxed.

You are not being silly, we nearly lost our dd in feb in a crash, she and all of her friends were badly injured. It was completely out of the blue and on a school trip. BUT as a parent you have to belive these things are incredibly rare, planes don't often crash, anaesthetics are incredibly safe and accidents rarely happen.

Hugs to you chik and know ds will be fine, probably far calmer than you.xxx

WelshMaenad · 01/10/2012 19:53

Dd had a procedure under GA a few months ago, it petrified me! She was fine.

Both of us were allowed with her till she went to anaesthetic room, where only one parent accompanied. I stayed with her while they put her under, it was a far quicker process than I expected. Ow - boom - asleep.

Floggingmolly · 01/10/2012 19:53

Best of luck for tomorrow, everything will be fine Smile

G1nger · 01/10/2012 20:02

I know how you feel. My son had an operation two months ago. He is fine. Your son will be fine, too. You won't stop worrying until he is conscious again, I know, but he'll be fine x

nirvana1111 · 01/10/2012 20:19

Its natural to feel worry about these things! I worry about it all the time, its just what happens when you become a mother I guess!
He is in the best hands and will be safe, please try to take someone with you as it is horrible to be so worried on your own and have no one to talk to or even just hols your hand.

DD had an operation at 3 weeks old, for a hernia. One of the surgeons came out during the operation and I absolutely shat myself, my blood ran cold and I thought my heart was going to come out of my mouth. Turns out they had found another hernia in the other side and wanted me to sign a consent form to have it corrected aswell. Im so glad I had my mum there with be to hols me hand, but really anyone would have done the job in those circumstances!

He will be fine, wishing you the best!

edwinbear · 01/10/2012 20:31

ds had surgery at 9 months and I think the worry is absolutely normal. dh and I both stayed with him until he was asleep, and I have to say, for me, it was actually OK watching him fall asleep. We had been really well briefed on what to expect and it went exactly as they had described, which really helped. That 45 mins waiting was the longest 45 mins of my life though. Good luck tomorrow, I'm sure it will all go well.

Badvoc · 01/10/2012 20:37

Had to take ds1 in to surgery when he was 2.5.
It was the hardest thing I have ever had to do.
On the plus side I might be scarred for life and he doesn't remember a thing! :)
Will be thinking of you both tomorrow x

SageYourOracle · 01/10/2012 22:19

Another one holding your hand Flojo.

My DD had her first GA at just 3 months old and when she still only weighed about 4 lbs. Having to carry her into the anaesthetic room and watch as they put the mask over her face was awful but her op was necessary and she was all smiles later on that day. She had her second GA at 6 months and it was no easier but she was totally fine.

Anaesthetists are highly skilled and, I've found, very caring people who are good at putting people at ease.

I'll be thinking of you but you'll be fine, as will your wee one. Will you come back at some point and let us know how it went?

Original poster
Flojo1979 · 01/10/2012 23:25

Thank-you so much everyone, its so nice seeing everyone's comforting messages, I wish I had friends like this in RL!
My parents r looking after DD so I'm alone. Need to be at the hospital for 7am and nursery doesn't open that early!

OP posts:
Startailoforangeandgold · 01/10/2012 23:34

Hand holding, DD2 has had 2 GA to set bones. Fortunately neither time did I have long to worry about it.
He'll be fine and if he's only out for a short time he'll hardly even be groggy.

Starving Hungary and gasping for a drink, but fine.

Original poster
Flojo1979 · 01/10/2012 23:54

Yeah that is the worry too! He's going to be so thirsty and hungry! But hopefully he's old enough not to moan to much!

OP posts:
triplets · 02/10/2012 00:03

Sending you love for tomorrow, he is in safe hands, maybe not yours but just as safe.............god bless xx.

PuffPants · 02/10/2012 00:12

Poor you. My friend's baby is having an operation tomorrow too and she feels exactly as you do, floods of tears, anxious, very frightened. It's a horrible experience but your DS will be so well looked-after and I absolutely second the poster who commented on anaesthetists generally being really caring people with lovely bedside manners.

Stay strong, it will soon be over.

Mechavivzilla · 02/10/2012 06:57

Thinking about you and hoping all goes well!

For what it is worth, I am nearly 30 and my mum was beside herself when I had a minor op last month. Totally normal! I was totally fine and so was she :)

AnOldieButNotSoGoody · 02/10/2012 07:04

Thinking of you both this morning.

He will be fine xx

perceptionreality · 02/10/2012 07:14

It's natural to feel anxious about your child having a GA, but they are very safe - he is going to be ok! They always do a risk assessment before any operation. I've had two GAs for non-emergency reasons and was fine xx

Original poster
Flojo1979 · 02/10/2012 17:21

He's in theatre now, they said he'll be about an hr. He was last on the list. I went with him til he was put to sleep.

OP posts:
Original poster
Flojo1979 · 02/10/2012 17:25

It hurt him when they put the canular in. I wish they'd done that on the ward earlier then he might not have been so upset. He was crying and scared. The anesthetist wasn't very helpful, they tried but made it worse, like told him when the canular was going in etc.
He went to sleep all of a sudden.
Nurse said they'd come and get me once he was awake. I just don't like the idea of him waking up surrounded by strangers :(

OP posts:
Hopeforever · 02/10/2012 17:27

Glad all is well but I'd be having a chat about making him last in the list when you have to be there at 7am. Different if they have had emergencies

If you are a single parent they should take into account other children you might have when asking you to leave the house so early and find others to care for siblings.

PenguinBear · 02/10/2012 17:27

He'll be fine op, sending lots of positive vibes your way :)

Original poster
Flojo1979 · 02/10/2012 17:41

They said it was in age order and 7 yo was the oldest Hmm
I did ask several parents how old their kids were and everyone I spoke to did have young DC's.
Lots of toddlers getting tonsils out.

OP posts:
Hopeforever · 02/10/2012 17:55

If it was I. Age order, did they not know their before today Confused

McHappyPants2012 · 02/10/2012 17:55

glad all went well :)