to have been infuriated by this driver?

[Gentleness]

Part of the route we were taking tonight was closed for roadworks and there was a long diversion. In the end it added 30 miles to the journey on winding single carriageway roads, almost all clearly marked as national speed limit. We soon ended up 3 cars behind a little car being driven at a steady 40 despite all the signs. 1 car managed to overtake quite early on on a rare straight stretch but it was rainy, dark, hilly and winding so much that there just weren't other opportunities. 20 miles we were stuck behind this fool who either didn't notice the long stretch of diverted cars stuck behind her, didn't notice the many places she could have pulled in, didn't know what the national speed limit sign meant or was too anxious to take it all in and respond appropriately to the situation. Or just didn't care. Who knows?

Eventually I managed to overtake ( which is how I know she was female) but I was so cross at her incompetence that I honked the horn at her as I did. Ok, I know that bit was unreasonable, but dh thinks it was unreasonable to be cross with her at all. I don't - pointless maybe, but justified given that however nervous, she could have pulled over rather than hold everyone up for so long. So, your opinions please - worthwhile anger or not, do you think her driving was enough to anger?

"What makes anyone so arrogant that they think their desire to arrive somewhere ten minutes earlier trumps my right to stay alive and uninjured?"

Agree also, YABVVVU

I also live in a rural area, very windy and if it is dark, as Kungfupanda said, you are following someones tail lights, which is a lot easier than if you are at the front and trying to drive.

Also for everyone saying she should pull over, if its dark and you don't know the route, you cannot see where to pull over until you are on it / past it. So to pull in you need to slam the breaks on, which is dangerous, especially if some arsehole is tailgating you. Unless you go at 20 mph, so annoying everyone else even more.

X-post with Terracotta and Lonely.

Does anyone think the OP is coming back?

The OP was at 1:22am. Maybe the OP is still in bed, or having breakfast?

Y'know i've just thought - although i'm a pretty speedy driver (rural area) i DO slow down more than is strictly necessary if i've got some twat behind me with their brights on or a 4x4 with lights set badly dazzling me to buggery!

Perhaps that was happening to the woman in front of the OP?

YANBU to expect someone to pull over and let a stack of cars past if they were doing a speed not appropriate to the road conditions. 40 mph seems quite low an I live in a very rural area. Obviously if there was a queue of cars behind her she probably was going unreasonably slowly.

I'm with hecate earlier up the thread.
Dark
Rainy
Windy
Unfamiliar road.
Idiots tailgating her...

40 sounds sensible.

YABU
and impatient
and rude
and aggressive.

Things which can add up to 'dangerous'.

It can be frustrating when someone is going slower than you would like to but the road belongs equally to them as to you. Calm down.

Also going to add to the chorus of YABUs, in those circumstances of darkness and bad weather on rural roads I would have driven below the limit too, and anyone beeping or flashing me would have probably resulted in me driving slower because it would stress me out more.

YANBU the conditions are irrelevant. If anybody wants to drive slower than the speed limit they can do. However if they see a great big queue of traffic behind them they should pull over. It is in the highway code - show some consideration!
Also 10 minutes can make a big difference to someone going home from work if the have children. They might not see them before they are asleep for the night.

If you're in a queue of traffic at night you have much better visibility of the road ahead due to the headlights/taillights of those in front of you. The person in front has a much more restricted view as they've only got their own lights and oncoming traffic to provide clues about corners etc.

Having said that, if the person was driving at a flat 40 for twenty miles regardless of cornering, puddles and the like I would be a bit suspicious of their ability to judge the road. It would not be unreasonable to expect them to speed up a bit for straight stretches, and not doing so is unsettling and irritating.

It is weird how easy it is to collect a queue even when you ARE doing the speed limit, mind you. If I get wankers tailgating I just flip the rear view mirror so I'm not blinded and carry on. I'm a pretty quick driver too, so have no sympathy with dickheads behind me desperate to overtake when I'm already going at the speed limit.

Actually, the time difference is likely to be less than 2 minutes over that distance.

Dp and a mate delivered a car - dp in nice modern company car, mate in 20yo van. Distance of 70-80 miles. Dp zips off up the motorway, mate arrives less than 10 minutes later despite dp doing 70+ and mate 55...

And that was clear, daylit roads.

Yabu. Speed limits are a maximum not a target! You mention dark, hilly, winding roads in the rain. What part of those makes you think that 60moh would be a better speed than 40mph?
Sounds like the driver annoying you was driving at a sensible and safe speed for the conditions and the road, and the idiots in the tailback behind were the ones in error.
I've lost count of the fuckmuppets I've almost run into who insist on driving at 60mph down the narrow twisty windy road near our house in the dark and rain, despite the fact that it's only wide enough for 2 cars if one is up on the verge. I even had one bloke doing 40mph in the snow last year, with packed snow and ice on the road and near zero visibility. Thankfully I ran into the hedge to avoid him rather than the tree 6ft from my bonnet.

YANBU. Theres too much emphasis on speed in this country as the cause of accidents, and the quality of driving is ignored. If someone is only capable of driving at 40mph because its dark and wet, doesn't know the roads, and is unaware of long tailbacks behind, IMHO that is an usafe driver. She could have managed 50mph, or pulled over to let cars past.

I have some sympathy with the OP.

We often get stuck behind people driving, even in broad daylight, in good conditions, at 30mph on a national speed limits road we rely on to get into school/commute, etc. That is, they're driving at half the speed limit on the road.

They do not check mirrors at all so have no idea that they are keeping a queue of traffic waiting. It is selfish--on a road and in conditions where they could pull over. And yes, after years of patiently sitting behind them, I do now flash them when we come to places I know they could pull in.

Some people do not understand the different speed limits.

Just because the speed limit is 60, doesn't mean you have to drive at that speed. People who think you should make me want to beep at them for being dangerous twats. As half the thread has said 40mph in rainy, windy, hilly conditions on a country road after dark, is completely fine. Lets not forget that a lot of cars drive different and have better road handling than others. I noted the fact it was a 'little car' - which makes more likely that its road handling isn't the best. I've noted in the past that the fuckwits who beep at others like this, have a tendency to drive particular types of powerful cars - they are therefore just ignorant pricks who have an attitude that they own the road and how dare little cars share it with them.

If you want to drive like a maniac fine and end up upside down in a drystone wall, but don't be abusive to others for driving with a brain cell.

P.S. What time of night were you beeping her at? It was after 11pm wasn't it?

P.P.S. Why the emphasis twice on the fact she was female?

P.P.P.S. I'd love to know what car you drive.

P.P.P.P.S. Whats more dangerous - driving slowly in bad conditions or overtaking in anger in bad conditions?

Hmm, phone post from earlier this morning didn't seem to make it! I was amused at those who thought it was a reverse aibu! My name is aspirational rather than reflective sadly.

I completely agree with all those saying respond to the road conditions but this driver wasn't. As I said, she was at a steady 40 ALL the time - wide bends, tight bends, rain stopped, rain pelting it down, uphill or down. Those of us stuck behind her were varying our speed and braking distances but even where it was perfectly safe to do so ( though not necessarily safe enough to pull out, gain speed and overtake) she went no faster. And even when 30 would have been safer age stuck to 40! That to me speaks of someone without a lot of road- sense or the sense to recognise it's time to stop. There were well signed parking lay-bys! Panic is not a good excuse.

Scares me that there are drivers out there who just carry on regardless. I agree I was unreasonable to be angry with her - pretty pointless - and definitely to have beeped. But I still think she was a prime example of drivers who can't be trusted to be safe. To those who think you should just drive at the speed you feel is safe for you, at what point do you say it is time to stop altogether?

In my defense for the anger, we were 20 miles off on a diversion and I knew we were nowhere near the main route yet, and at least 200 miles to travel once we rejoined it. For all I knew, I'd be stuck behind her for another 20!

YANBU
Dropping to 50 in some places for safety on an unfamiliar road, in the rain, I can understand.

40, on a decent two lane road is just down right rude and dangerous.

People will get fed up and over take in stupid places, they shouldn't, but they do.

We have a lot of, unnecessary, 50 limits.
Good 60 capable roads crippled by our stupid council.

People do 40 on them too!

Drives me absolutely nuts!

YABVU.

60 is a limit, not an instruction. If she was unfamiliar with that windy road on a dark, wet night, it seems fairly reasonable to me.

Agree with all the above regarding assessing the conditions and driving accrdingly. Sounds like you (OP) were BU.

However if the driver in front was one of these idiots...

" My dad only drives over 40 on the motorway. And so would I. "

then perhaps your irritation had some foundation!

Oh yes, Startail, fecking fifty-fairies ruining good roads. Oxfordshire has been particularly afflicted by pointless 50 limits, it does my head in when we visit the ILs. And to think my driving instructor used to tell me to speed up from 50 on THOSE SAME ROADS before the limits came in... And then the "slow" paint that people brake for, even though that was there before the limit changed and is largely unnecessary now people are already going 10mph slower...

In that case, well sign posted lay-bys and 40 mph regardless, YANBU.

The driver would almost certainly have failed a driving test for persistently driving at an inappropriate speed, so YANBU.

If you're not capable of driving above 40, you shoudn't be on the road at all.

Erm, I have a bit of sympathy for slow drivers (and I'm a speedy one). I KNOW it's dangerous to hold up and exasperate people, but having aquaplaned and written off my car some months ago I understand why some people get nervous on wet roads and go slower than might be necessary.

Being very, VERY rural, we have a lot of elderly people still driving as well. Personally I think it's better they still have some mobility and independence, even if that means I have to crawl along behind them for 5 miles or so. My 'right' to drive at the limit versus their 'right' not to live in sheltered accommodation is a somewhat larger moral question than the Highway Code can answer.

She was probably driving at that speed cos you were stuck up her bum.