Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to have been infuriated by this driver?

234 replies

Gentleness · 01/10/2012 01:22

Part of the route we were taking tonight was closed for roadworks and there was a long diversion. In the end it added 30 miles to the journey on winding single carriageway roads, almost all clearly marked as national speed limit. We soon ended up 3 cars behind a little car being driven at a steady 40 despite all the signs. 1 car managed to overtake quite early on on a rare straight stretch but it was rainy, dark, hilly and winding so much that there just weren't other opportunities. 20 miles we were stuck behind this fool who either didn't notice the long stretch of diverted cars stuck behind her, didn't notice the many places she could have pulled in, didn't know what the national speed limit sign meant or was too anxious to take it all in and respond appropriately to the situation. Or just didn't care. Who knows?

Eventually I managed to overtake ( which is how I know she was female) but I was so cross at her incompetence that I honked the horn at her as I did. Ok, I know that bit was unreasonable, but dh thinks it was unreasonable to be cross with her at all. I don't - pointless maybe, but justified given that however nervous, she could have pulled over rather than hold everyone up for so long. So, your opinions please - worthwhile anger or not, do you think her driving was enough to anger?

OP posts:
Mrscog · 01/10/2012 07:22

Exactly what Hectate said. It is NOT appropriate to drive at 60 on a windy, hilly, single carriageway road in the dark. Instead of being angry, consider that this person may have saved you from a nasty accident.

You know when you hear of carloads of people being killed on country roads? They are the ones who either haven't adjusted their driving or are victims of someone else's unadjusted driving.

Reconsider you driving style in the countryside before you have an accident.

I would agree though that it is considerate to pull over in these circumstances and let maniacs pass.

noblegiraffe · 01/10/2012 07:22

National speed limit, not target. There are national speed limits near me where you'd have to be an idiot to drive down them at 60.

And a rainy, windy road on a dark night sounds like one of them YABU.

GColdtimer · 01/10/2012 07:27

So it was rainy, dark, windy and hilly and you think 60 would have been safe? It probably wouldn't have been. As my speed awareness leader said @the speed limit is a limit. Not a target".

YABU

mynameis · 01/10/2012 07:28

Sorry but YABU that would have been the speed I would have been driving in those conditions too.

I won't risk mine or my families lives to please other drivers

60 was the limit, not the speed everyone has to travel at!

JarethTheGoblinKing · 01/10/2012 07:36

I get annoyed at people regularly doing 40 in a 60 limit on a particular road, but that's because its a long, straight, wide road with good visibility. You can very safely do 60mph there.

I'm a fast driver, and confident driving on winding country roads, but I would do 40mph in the situation you describe. 60 would be too fast.

AnitaBlake · 01/10/2012 07:43

I drive fast and confidently - on roads I know well in perfect conditions. I have driven at 20 and less on the same roads depending on the conditions. I was taught to ignore traffic behind me, give extra space and time (by reducing speed) if I felt drivers behind were too close and use my own judgement to determine my speed within the speed limit of the road. YABVVU. I would only pull over to allow people to pass if there was a mechanical fault on my car which meant I was causing an obstruction, not if I felt I was driving appropriately for the conditions.

AnneTwacky · 01/10/2012 07:45

If is was a hilly, winding single carriageway road and raining then maybe the driver felt 40 was the safest speed especially if she was unfamiliar with the road.

The speed limit is a maximum not a target and taking into account the conditions you describe I can understand why someone would not be doing 60. To be honest I don't think I would have been either.

Chandon · 01/10/2012 07:49

yabu,

those roads account for 70% of all accidents, and if you have not driven on them before, so don't kniow where the curves are, and it is dark and and rainy?

I would not go faster than 40 then.

What was such a life-and-death matter for you to be in such a hurry by the way?

yabu for honking.

The road belongs to everyone, not just people who drive the speed limit. there is no obligation to drive the speed limit in adverse weather conditions.

bigsnugglebunny · 01/10/2012 07:51

YABU - everyone else pretty much said it, but you're supposed to slow down in the rain anyway, because of the impact on your stopping distance.

OTheHugeManatee · 01/10/2012 07:54

YANBU to get annoyed but U to beep at her.

Chandon · 01/10/2012 07:54

....guess it must have been a reverse aibu, with hindsight and considering the OP's name!

PurplePidjin · 01/10/2012 07:57

A wiggly rural road in adverse weather conditions? I live near plenty of those, and been driving them regularly for 10, and 40 is a nice safe speed. I would not expect to go faster, and I know the route (in some cases from years of daily commuting)

Yabu and driving pretty recklessly.

Bunbaker · 01/10/2012 08:04

"My dad only drives over 40 on the motorway. And so would I."

Even on a straight road during daylight and in good weather conditions? If you are too scared to drive at 45/50/55 under those circumstances I hope you are considerate enough to pull over and let other vehicles past.

OP - if this road you were on was a diversion I expect the driver was unsure of herself. That said, does she never use her rear view mirror? Was she unaware that there was a huge tailback behind her?

Incidentally the police are just as likely to pull someone over if they were driving significantly under the speed limit (in good driving conditions) because they would suspect that the driver might be unwell or under the influence of drugs or alcohol. In good driving conditions it is inconsiderate and can be dangerous to drive too slowly because other drivers take risks to overtake. You can fail your driving test if you "fail to make sufficient progress" as well.

HeadfirstForHalos · 01/10/2012 08:11

YABU. Dark, rainy, windy, and a hilly road with lots of bends that she possibly didn't know well as it were a diversion route- she was the one driving at the correct speed.

HiHowAreYou · 01/10/2012 08:16

I think YABU too. 40 sounds reasonable in those conditions!

Northernlurker · 01/10/2012 08:23

If it took you so long to overtake then it was clearly a very windy road. In wet conditions she was doing a safe speed and you were driving like a git. If I were your dh I would refuse to get in the car with you again till you've addressed your anger issues.

RuleBritannia · 01/10/2012 08:25

Well, Gentleness. You have been told advised.

noblegiraffe · 01/10/2012 08:28

I was driving on a nice straight road in clear conditions at 60 yesterday. The guy behind me was right up my arse, weaving from side to side clearly wanting to get past. At the first break in oncoming traffic he overtook, only to have to pull in directly in front of me as there was a long line of traffic all doing 60. His stupid, aggressive driving achieved the square root of fuck all as he had to stay there the rest of the way.

Sometimes it's not the person in front who drives like an arsehole.

MrsAceRimmer · 01/10/2012 08:32

YABU - dark wet windy roads? Going at 60 could have killed you! Poor woman. I live in the middle of Aberdeenshire, and see countless cars in fields because drivers do not adjust their speed to the road - one sharp bend and your car flips into the fields. It makes me Angry and Sad to see this.

Tuttutitlookslikerain · 01/10/2012 08:33

YABU, for all the reasons every one else has said. I always think it is better to arrive 10 minutes later, than not arrive at all!

Sirzy · 01/10/2012 08:33

I agree with the majority.

Some roads which are marked a national speed limit even in good conditions you would have to have a death wish to drive at 60. Given the conditions 40 doesn't seem at all unreasonable, actually it sounds pretty sensible

SammyTheSwedishSquirrel · 01/10/2012 08:36

There's only one thing more annoying than needlessly slow drivers (and in this case it sounds like that wasn't the case anyway) and that's angry and aggressive drivers.

YABU

QueenOfFarkingEverything · 01/10/2012 08:42

YABVVVU.

40 sounds like a perfectly appropriate speed for the conditions. I live on a national speed limit road that is hilly and windy, and tbh I rarely go much above 40 on it even in the daylight, never mind at night in the rain. Its not safe to go at 60 - there are sharp bends with no real warning that have a massive drop on one side into a river, and a sheer rockface on the other side.

And I bet if you'd been taking a driving test under the conditions you describe, you'd have been well and truly failed for overtaking and beeping so you could go at an inappropriate speed.

abitcoldupnorth · 01/10/2012 08:42

YABU.

Every time I get tailgated by an Audi and then overtaken on the windy country road we live on, I know that 2 miles down the road I will come straight up behind the same driver now stuck behind a tractor/rubbish truck/3 small cars.

It's such a risk to drive at that speed for no advantage whatsoever.

Pagwatch · 01/10/2012 08:44

Yabu.