For thinking i shouldn't be getting constantly pestered by the local nurse and GP team to get my daughter immunises when i've repeatedly told them my answer is no?

[Lowla]

My daughter is 4. She got all her jabs as a baby, but i stopped at the MMR one. Since we missed the appointment, i've been getting loads of letters to invite us to the clinic for the MMR jab and now her school booster jab for some other virus. (Hib or something like that).

I've phoned the GP and asked them not to send any more letters out as i've chosen not to get her immunised any further for my own personal reasons, and worries over her last reactions to the jabs. And now i've got some nurse calling me asking to do a home visit next week to 'check on me and dd'. I asked 'is this about the jabs?' and she said, rather reluctantly, 'yes'.

AIBU for feeling like they should respect my decision?

Sorry for the bad grammar. Writing this in a rush as i have to run and get dd from school.

But for someone like me who was born in the UK and has complete medical notes which say I was vaccinated against everything why would I be re-tested? And I know I was, at least for rubella.

Because if you ever saw your UK medical notes you'd be utterly horrified at how little has been recorded and kept over the years. I had the entire lot of mine printed off/photocopied when I emigrated. I was gobsmacked at how little information (from various GPs over the years) they contained.

Mine are probably better then because I'm an immigrant !!!!!!

Everyone has the right to decide what vaccines they do or don't give their child. It is disgusting that some people think they have the right to pretty much disregard a parents opinion about what should be injected into their own baby because of 'the greater good'.

I actually don't give a flying fuck about the greater good, when I had a child that child became more important to me that anyone or anything else. You might call that selfish. I call it being a good parent.

OP, YANBU to expect that your decision will be respected by HCPs, but unfortunately that's not going to happen. I still get asked about my children's vaccinations, even though they both had all three single vaccines when it came to MMR, they were both tested to check their immunity, and because of the way the booster things works, one of them was immune to rubella two years earlier than he would have been if we had gone down the MMR route. The surgery had been sent proof of all of this by a consultant paediatrician. They still give me shit.

They had no record of my not being vaccinated on my medical records, non at all.

YABU. As many others have said, you, and others, are putting many vulnerable people at risk!

My daughter suffered hyperthermia and rigors from the amount of antibiotics she had to have to fight off various infections. Would I stop giving her the antibiotics? no Because the side effects were preferable to her dying of pneumonia.

My point is, sometimes we have to make decisions for our children that cause them short term discomfort for long term benefits. So your reasons for not vaccinating,IMO, are not good enough.

My husband's had no record of the fact that he is terminally allergic to penicillin.

Fiona - I'm interested to know what reasons for not vaccinating would you consider "good enough"?

YABU OP.
Deciding not to vaccinate is not a one-off decision that you can never change. Loads of people have changed their minds about vaccination because of new research, or news stories, or because they've seen a friend suffer from one of these diseases or because a family member becomes immunocompromised and needs a firebreak around them. At the time of the last swine flu panic lots of GPs saw increases in MMR uptake and parents coming back to catch up with missed shots.
From the NHS's POV they need to capture these moments of "oh actually maybe I should go back and get the DCs' jabs done now" and translate them into action - and they do this by making it easy, by chasing at regular intervals so that if you change your mind there will be an opportunity to implement that.

Oh and YABU to be so sceptical about the possibility of your DD growing out of febrile convulsions - it is indeed the sort of thing children grow out of, though I sympathise about the fact that you can't ever know definitively whether she has grown out of then - it must be scary.

freddos but if you follow that argument to its logical conclusion our children would be growing up with polio and smallpox and measles. How can that be a good thing?

when I had a child that child became more important to me that anyone or anything else. You might call that selfish. I call it being a good parent.

What if an unvaccinated child travels as a young adult to a developing country? What if an unvaccinated woman catches rubella when she is pregnant? I don't call putting your child at risk in those ways being a good parent.

So, Honeytea, then should my child not be allowed to get pregnant or travel?

So, Honeytea, then should my child not be allowed to get pregnant or travel?

You're missing that unspoken caveat again :o

People vaccinated their children against polio/smallpox etc to protect their own children, not to protect those that exist a few generations later.

My husband's had no record of the fact that he is terminally allergic to penicillin

It's the same in Sweden they tried to give my friend penicillin just after her birth, only her DP asking waht they were giving her stopped her being given it. I think everyone has to be responsible for their own medical records to an extent and that certainly should include the lack of vaccinations.

maybe so, but caveat or not my child is unvaccinated

mydogsleepsonthebed

Of course not! Although she would have to be cautious about travel and pregnancy. She should mostly be ok in the uk/developed world due to their comprehensive vaccination programmes.

Young adults can make their own choices about vaccination and take their own risks. Travel vaccination advice is given out at surgeries, people are free to take it. And immunise themselves if they haven't already been.

If an unvaccinated woman catches rubella, then that is down to her or whoever made the choice not to vaccinate her.

The majority of these vaccine have worn off by adulthood anyway, so it's really a non point.

So, Honeytea, then should my child not be allowed to get pregnant or travel?

It is a risk they need to weigh up. they can choose to do what they wish but I think it is silly to put extra risks in life when you don't need to. I'm not talking about those children who can't be vaccinated I am talking about those (like myself) who can be vaccinated and whose parents choose for them not to be vaccinated.

Ok so I made a "choice" not to vaccinate my child did I? Have you any idea how patronizing and offensive that sounds?

*Young adults can make their own choices about vaccination and take their own risks. Travel vaccination advice is given out at surgeries, people are free to take it. And immunise themselves if they haven't already been.

If an unvaccinated woman catches rubella, then that is down to her or whoever made the choice not to vaccinate her.*

It just is not true, I was in exactly that situation, they would not give me a full set of vaccinations as an adult and they would not test my immunity. I asked for the rubella vaccine specifically as my DP's aunt has no eyes because of her mother catching it whilst she was pregnant, the nurse said we don't do single vaccine and your too old for the mmr so we cant do anything for you. I had the rubella vaccine done privatly.

mydog

Make sure you make her FULLY aware of that fact before going on any overseas trips, gap years, university, shopping trips to the west end, or anywhere else she may meet other unvaccinated people.
You wont get a warning that she has been exposed.
Just a VERY, VERY sick daughter.
Make sure she is aware of that so she can adjust her life options.

Freddos
The majority of these vaccine have worn off by adulthood anyway, so it's really a non point.
BOLLOCKS

I'm not talking about those children who can't be vaccinated mydogsleepsonthebed

I am talking about parents who made a choice who's children can be vaccinated but the parents choose not to. That is very different to those children who can't be vaccinated.

She is already very aware thank you Talkin of the many and varied ways in which her life options have to be adjusted due to her condition.

One good thing out of this thread - I'll have to ring up my surgery and renew my tetanus shot.