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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to expect not to have to tell the Nanny to change DS when he has a pooey nappy?

54 replies

Graciescotland · 24/09/2012 15:10

We hired a nanny on the basis of a recommendation when we moved abroad. I work partly from home so I'm sometimes there at the same time. I popped downstairs when they came home from the park/ shops a few minutes after I heard them come back to find that buggy had been folded and put away, shopping (just milk and juice) had been put on the countertop, nanny had hung up her coat and taken off her shoes and DS (age 2) had been left in a dirty nappy.

Having a chat apparently she'd known he'd had a poo at the supermarket and rather than change him felt it was more appropriate to wait the twenty minutes until she got back and then faff around for a bit. I didn't get the impression it was the first time either. They had a change bag with nappies and wipes and there are a bunch of cafes/ eateries next to supermarket several with babychanges and there was cash in babybag to be used for drinks/ snacks whilst out and about so she had a choice of to change on a bench or in a bathroom. It just would of required a tiny bit of proactivity.

To me it's bordering on neglect. I just don't understand why anyone would leave an upset little boy to ferment in his own poo when the situation could be easily remedied but apparently "other parents don't want her to change children except at home" which seems like utter bollocks to me.

She's been with us less than a month and there have been other issues so I suspect I'm going to have to bite the bullet and let her go but AIBU.

OP posts:
imperialstateknickers · 25/09/2012 18:04

Same here. Goodbye nanny!

maddening · 25/09/2012 20:29

Yanbu - she is employed to take care of ds in the way you choose - regardless of other parents nappy changing rules - she should follow your wishes

maddening · 25/09/2012 20:35

Ps sounds like she may have spent today looking for a new job

Graciescotland · 25/09/2012 20:51

You're so right, especially fillybuster, the nanny and I have parted ways. I'm only going to be here till January so was hoping to make it work but we're not happy and DS wasn't a fan so it's for the best.

She was our first ever Nanny and I think I've learnt a lot about how I do/ don't expect DS to be treated. It was a bit of a culture clash, I know in her last role the nanny looked after a toddler plus newborn, did all the cleaning/ laundry and cooked dinner. I assumed that by only giving her responsibility for DS the extra time/effort would go into DS but it didn't, oddly I suspect if I'd of given her more to do she'd of been happier.

We're trying out lots of toddler classes this week. DS loved kindermuzic today and we're at the local library for toddler storytime tomorrow so hopefully we can create a better routine whilst we're hunting for someone new to make it an easier transition.

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