to feel stressed out driving on motorway at night in heavy rain

[agnesf]

Have just completed 150 miles drive in rain with DH & DCs in car. DH cannot drive for health reasons so its always me in this situation. I find it really stressful to extent that right arm has gone numb from being so tense.

I used to be a bit more chilled about this but now feel like just one slip and I could kill everyone.

On radio was a programme about racing drivers being killed in Grand Prix and had to get DH to turn it off. AIBU

The rear fog light should probably be renamed owing to how many people you hear say 'the clue's in the name' in debates about it's use. It's for fog or any condition where visibility is very poor like super heavy rain. That's what the HC says anyway. But it also stresses they must be turned off when visibility improves.

YANBU, especially when so many other drivers fail to behave in a sensible, courteous way that keeps everyone safe. Really, is it so hard to indicate that you are changing lanes? And if you don't know about braking distances, or that they increase in wet conditions, you really shouldn't be driving at all! But yes, for most of us a bit of anxiety helps us stay focused and respond sensibly to the dangers so I try to see my increased tension as a positive thing!

Having some music that makes me feel grounded really helps. Dh can't understand why I keep the same 2 cds in the changer all the time, but I know I can rely on them to help me if the driving is stressful, or (far more often) other drivers behave like selfish idiots.

FWIW, AFAIR, F1 racing drivers have died mostly in dry conditions. :)

You are right to be worried in those circumstances, though.

F1 drivers switch to rain tyres, do reduce their speed and know what to do in case their cars swerve. Unlike cars and drivers on the road.

My brother wrecked his car in similar circumstances and was very lucky that there was no traffic at the time.

Remember to at least double your distance to the next car.

I have also once witnessed a car jumping the central separation and facing incoming traffic on the fast late in a rainy day. Luckily it was day time.

I'm a reasonable fast and confident driver, but always change to cautious mode in rain and fog.

I quote like driving in the rain if I have a long way to go - it's quite cosy and feels like an adventure. I don't espcially enjoy having to share any road with people who are driving too fast for the conditions though, so can totally understand it being stressful too if there was lots of traffic.

I have only once encountered rain that was so fierce I had to stop the car, Fortunately that wasn't on the motorway, and only lasted about 5 minutes, but it was like being under a waterfall.

YANBU to be a bit stressed about driving in poor conditions but if you are too tense then maybe you should think about some other form of transport. It does not do you any good if you are too tense as you can end up making stupid mistakes and are just as likely to end up crashing as the idiots doing 80mph in the outside lane. You do need a bit of confidence and your wits about you which you won't have if you get too scared.

Definitely agree to no fog lights in the rain, I don't care if there is spray, it still doesn't justify dazzling everybody around you.

Front foglights are only useful at night. Use dipped headlights to be visible in poor conditins, NOT front fogs.

Rear foglights are only useful during daylight fog. At night (and in rain) they are a positive nuisance. If the spray is too heavy you cannot see rear lights ahead then SLOW DOWN UNTIL YOU CAN.

" On radio was a programme about racing drivers being killed in Grand Prix and had to get DH to turn it off "

That must have been a very old programme - Ayrton Senna died in 1994 and there have not been any driver fatalities since.

Not unreasonable at all.
Horrible conditions to drive in, especially when some people drive like total idiots.

I got The Rage earlier, it's pouring with rain, cars pelting past the school so the 'Slow down' sign kept flashing.
It's dark and rainy and you're going past a school, you stupid bastards. You shouldn't need reminding.

If the spray is too heavy you cannot see rear lights ahead then SLOW DOWN UNTIL YOU CAN.

What if there is no car ahead?
How do you know there is a car if you don't see the rear lights, and how does slowing down help with the spray?

It makes sense to slow down ourselves so that we make less spray on our tails, and so that cars coming from behind can see us. But we can't possibly know if they see us or not...

In fact, I hate driving in rain or fog without cars in front (unlike in good conditions) because I never know whether I can't see them because they are not there or because the conditions are too bad.
Road side references are usually not good enough

Being dazzled by rear fog lamps is not a substitute for visibility.

They should not be used in spray.

YANBU - I drove home 2.5 hours yesterday daylight and rain and I felt stressed, No children or DH in the car, I drive lots and i do sometimes wonder how the people whizzing past can see more than me?

YANBU - definitely not.
I was close to tears, as the passenger, a few weeks ago while travelling to Eastern Europe. There was a torrential downpour, honestly couldn't see past the front of the car and we were on the German Autobahn!, which I detest even under normal driving conditions. It was dark and we couldn't see the lane markings as there's no "cats eyes" WHY? just why? My DP slowed as much as he could, there was nowhere we could pull over and idiots were still flying past us, It was terrifying. My DP got us in the slow lane and we stayed close behind an artic (we could at least see his lights) It happened again later that night but at least we were on a quieter road and could stop. I've never been so relieved to get out of the car.

Yesterday I could see cars ahead and see their lights - not bright or obvious due to spray but not invisible either. Fog prevents visibility full stop

Since we are discussing highway code :
236

You MUST NOT use front or rear fog lights unless visibility is seriously reduced (see Rule 226) as they dazzle other road users and can obscure your brake lights

Rear fog lights mean you cannot distinguish brake lights. In wet conditions you need as much warning as possible to know if cars are braking. You need to see those brake lights!

"I think 50 on a motorway is waaaaay to slow"

Not in driving rain it isn't.

Round here (South Yorkshire) the motorway is one of the few roads that doesn't have massively deep puddles, so it is one of the safer roads to drive on.

Make a point to stop at the new M25 Service Station.

Ooo Dan I am looking forward to that. Clacket Lane is soooooo yesterday!