AIBU to think that if you give your child a name that more commonly belongs to the opposite sex, or name your child after a vegetable...

[Jacksmania]

... then you shouldn't be all that surprised to get comments from people?

Disclaimer: I absolutely believe that anyone should be allowed to name their child whatever they like, as long as it's not obviously offensive. I mean, "Fuckface" or whatever is obviously out :o

I'm asking this because I've found myself in two separate situations this week where I ended up thinking, "well, come on..." but then wondered what the MN Jury would think.

Will try to be as brief as possible:

1 - acquaintance was registering her DD for ballet lessons. Her DD is named something most commonly male.
Acquaintance to ballet school: "I'd like to register my DD "male name" for ballet class Tuesday nights at x time."
Ballet school: "I'm sorry but boys' ballet classes are Wednesdays at x time".
Acquaintance: "as I said, I'd like to register my daughter "male name" for ballet at x time"
Ballet school: "your daughter "male name"?..."
Acquaintance: (seething) "yes my daughter "male name""
Ballet school: "..."

Acquaintance hangs up and starts ranting about idiocy of school who can't grasp that "male name" might be a girl. I listen but then stupidly say "well, you have to admit, it's not usually ever that I've heard of a girl's name".
Acquaintance: at me.

2 - friend makes reference to her teenage son whose name is in fact that of a leafy green vegetable. Person who can be a bit of a knobber in surrounding group overhears and in a sneering tone says to friend "did you say "x" was your teenager's name??"
Friend says yes. Knobber person says "you are aware that "teenager's name" is in fact a green leafy vegetable??" Friend (obviously irritated) says "yes". Knobber walks off smirking.

Friend is upset with Knobber, as was I because really he didn't need to be quite that knobbish about it... and I've obviously learned my lesson because I didn't say anything this time, but thought to myself, "well, he does have a point".

So - AIBU to think that you should probably expect comments all your child's life if you name them after a leafy green, or give a girl a boy's name or vice versa? I do understand it gets tiresome, but, well...
And want to add that I in no way condone rudeness!!! I think it should be possible to ask or comment without being horrible.

To get back to the original question - if you still care OP - I think YABU.

In the first instance, the woman clearly stated her daughter. Twice. And it's not that unusual as a girls' name anymore.

The second time, YABU for not telling the knobber that he's really rude. Whether or not he has a point, she wasn't even talking to him. What a weirdo.

i wonder could this turn into a scientific study lol
all boys named kale will turn into handsome young men :)

I think Kale is OK as I would assume it was Cale, short for Caleb, if I came across it as a name.

Reid is fine as a boy's name - in Scotland it is still fairly common to give boys their mother's maiden name as a surname. It used to be pretty standard, so you get men called Milne, Campbell, Forrester, Cameron, Reid, Kerr etc. Graham is another common Scottish surname often used as a first name.

Cameron is definately a boy's name, Cameron Diaz notwithstanding, whoever said upthread it used to be a girl's name is wrong, it is a Scottish boy's name and common surname.

Elliott, hmmmm, I would assume boy, but there you go.

Elliot is on the list for me as a girls name, I may have to reconsider. I have always liked the name since i was little, But wouldnt call a boy it for some reason.

I like Kale and wouldnt think it was odd, I know 2 Coles's and a Klae. I know a Stevie, just Stevie which i think is a bit odd.

My dd has a name that is often a boys name - the spelling is different but no difference in pronunciation.

Your friend should have learnt by now that the conversation should go:

I'd like to register my 5 year old DD for ballet
The class for 5 year old girs is on tuesday at 6pm
Thats great, her name is BOYS NAME
Thats a boys name (only occasional response)
Yes, but spelt differently no h on the end. Spells name.

Daimler family I think Thumb.

Lots of people have unusual names. It is only an issue if their parents are pretentious about it.

Never name your dc thinking it says something about you.

Is Kale of Turkish origin? I think it means fortress, better than a green leafy vegetable anyway. I do know a Turkish boy called Tuna, which seems even more unfortunate than being a vegetable.

Let's be honest, a few years ago most people would have been hard pushed to identify what kind of vegetable Kale was, if they knew it was a vegetable. Even now I think its something generally eaten by people who grow their own/have veg boxes. I therefore think there is no problem with Kale.

I think Elliot is a lovely name for a girl, but think your friend shouldn't have been surprised by the conversation.

Anyway, if she get's fed up with it she can always call herself Ellie.

They shouldn't have been, merrymouse - although it wasn't a popular supermarket item, I'll admit, it was one of the easiest home-grown greens and was encouraged to be grown in WWII - I guess people might have stopped knowing so much about it when it became easier to buy your greens rather than growing your own although I did because my guineapigs loved it!

Good job kale hasn't got curly hair...then he'd be curly kale!

Lettice, is indeed an Eliazbathan name. It's a corruption of Lætitia. I quite like it (It's better than the other shortening "Titty" ) . Imagine having girl/boy twins, you could call them Lettice and Kale

I suspect there might have been kale fatigue after WWII.

Crikey, I can't even spell Elizabethan before my first coffee of the day.

Asparagus would have been naice, more a whispy leaved green veg though?

YANBU if it is not a common name where you live but I think that does come into it. Also, I think some people enjoy the attention they get from people when saying their child's name if it is particularly unusual. I'm don't think all people do but their are definitely some that revel in it. There is a Beck in my DS's class which I know is not particularly unusual but the mum obviously thinks it is as when she told me her DS's name, she thought I said
, 'Ben' on repeating his name, I knew she said Beck but she was quick to correct me and quite abrupt about it. Her you gets daughter is unusual and you can tell she loves the attention from it. A lot of children have unusual names where we live so I no one is going to bat an eyelid at the names of her DC locally! My DP is Jewish and before my DS was born we went to visit a Jewish Cemetry where his Grandad's head stone is. Anyway, my DP was truly inspired by all the amazing Jewish names on the headstones and wanted to give DS a distinctly Jewish name but I'm not Jewish and I thought I'd be forever explaining the choice in DP's absence! In the end, we decided on names that are quite classic for both our DC but DP was adamant he didn't want the quintessentially English names for them.

And girl/boy name would have to be Geoff. Thought op was being very brave posting names until she said she was west of canadaland. (White rockish?, all nuts there )

Pah! Blackholes got in with the Curly Kale before me.

Well sot of I was going to say he's not called Curly Kale so that's something. Personally I don't think there's anything wrong with it, well I certainly don't think 'vegtable' on hearing it as a name, it's not like Sprout or Turnip.

I actually think I prefer Elliot as a girl's name, it seems to suit better, never really liked it (dislike caused by association)

Here's anojther "in Ireland" fact. It is not unusal for a man over a certain age to have the name Mary (mostly as a second name luckily for them), no matter how often I hear about it I think "why? WHY? Just why?"

Prefer beck to budweiser

Apologies for the horrendous grammar and typos above.

Elliot is a much nicer sounding name on a girl to me. There were 11 registered in 2011 so not that rare - unlike my DD's name which doesn't make the 3 baby threshold :(

No Kales or Lettuces in 2011 but lots of Leticia's (in various spellings)

But yes you should expect comments if you don't name your child Fred or George, being from different countries always get "is that a common name in DP's country"?

No, but you can do that funky ae thing :o

Anyone else wondering what littletrees DD's name is?

My guess is Carter (Get Carter).

YANBU, OP.

Ireland is full of male Patsys too.

My Dad has Mary in his name - he's Irish and its his Confirmation name - back then you were all given the same name of he saint for that year (or something).
By the time I got confirmed you could choose, so I chose Helena, never use it though. You can choose to use it or not.

Doesn't explain Patsy though