to think that making fun of someone's weight is not on?

[showtunesgirl]

An old work acquaintance has just posted a pic of herself on facebook sitting next to a large black lady on the tube. Her friend must have taken the pic and she's called the picture Fatty fatty boom boom.

I've commented: What is the point of this? Just as it's not acceptable to make fun of someone for being black, it's also not acceptable to make fun of someone for being big.

AIBU to think that she's wrong?

@amybelle1990 why are you fatist exactly???

I'm not sure hating it when people try to normalise or defend being overweight is fattist, is it? Unless of course they're telling you they have a medical complaint and you still 'hate' it?

I would have thought it was just annoying, like when people try to defend smoking because they know some other people who smoke and they happen to be healthy at the moment?

YANBU at all!

I would delete her without a second thought.

I think it's an upbringing thing I did get quite fat at one point and my family had zero tolerance and relentlessly commented on my lifestyle until I addressed it. I was very grateful afterwards even though it was really difficult and I do think that other people would benefit from the blunt honesty of being told that they're overweight and should really change. It might not be what they want to hear and (as said in the previous post) I'd never deliberately try to offend an overweight person, but I just see it as something as repulsive as smoking too much. I've also spent a lot of time working with morbidly obese people that are really disillusioned about their lifestyle and put a lot of blame on other people for how they live their lives, so I don't have a very balanced view on overweight people.

I'm definitely not passing this off as one of my more redeeming qualities, but unless you have a medical condition I can't see any reason why a person should let themselves be unhealthily obese and be happy with it.

I do agree with the poster that it is unacceptable to pick on someone for being fat.

I only use the phrase fattist because my DH says that I am

amybelle but that's the thing, why do you think that a person can definitely "help" it?

I used to work with a girl who was on the larger side and the reason why she couldn't exercise is because she'd been in a car crash where all the passengers except for hers had died. Now she finds even normal walking difficult.

Amybelle, is your DH an authority on the subject then?have I missed something ? Is his word as god as law?

YANBU

It amazes me, how some people never really left the school playground. There is NO justification for anyone to be spiteful to anyone else on account of how much someone weighs. Because that's what it is, spiteful bullying behaviour.maybe those making nasty comments really feel that bad about themselves that they have to draw attention to themselves, at the expense of someone else?

amybelle 'repulsive' is a pretty strong word to use in the context of someone's weight :(

Her twunt of a so-called boyfriend has posted:

yes it is, they shouldn't eat all the pies :)

I am so, so tempted to write back: Ah yes, I remember you XXX. I met you just the once and it was quite enough. XXX, you're welcome to each other and bye bye!

Caitlin Moran covered this in How to be a Woman.
She said that if Keith Richards addiction had been food instead of drugs people wouldnt have thought of him as "cool"
Coming on stage with a Subway sandwich in his hand instead of a fag or a spliff he would have been thought of totally differently. Thats what Caitlin said in that book and i agree with her.

Has Caitlin never heard of Meatloaf?

I mean the singer, not the dish....

Nasty people, report the photo as abusive and defriend.

amybelle

"and I do think that other people would benefit from the blunt honesty of being told that they're overweight and should really change"

Save yourself the bother, they already know they are overweight. They don't need someone who labours under the delusion that they are an expert ,having been overweight .
I know a few alcoholics, that does not make them experts in treating individual case of alcoholism.

And having been overweight yourself gives you no right to judge anyone or behave accordingly, the same as colour does not excuse you from being rascist, or your gender preclude you from acting in a sexist manner.

What it boils down to is acknowledging that no one, including yourself is perfect. And the real treasure is being grown up enough to behave in a respectful, civil manner to others. You either have it or you don't. Remarks such as you have made say more about you than anyone else.

I think she was just using it as an example.
Keith Richards never ate a sandwich on stage. And neither did Meatloaf.

thats the whole thing tho, a lot of fat people have et a load of pies, but some (like me) have become extremely asthmatic and am on a shitload of steroids, they especially make your face look fat, I used to be a size 12 before I "got" asthma, I was at the gym one day and after a session couldn't breathe and went purple, I got nebulised and ever since then cant do more exercise than walking (on the flat) or gentle swimming. I eat less than my 17yo DD but she does exercise. In the 10 years that I have been on and off the steroids I have put on about 6 stone, to the point Im now a size 22. Yet I see my mate eat custard donuts like they are going out of fashion and she has room in a size 10. I eat fruit and fibre for breakfast, usually soup or a sandwich for lunch and the family meal at dinner plus some fruit during the day. But I need to eat 1250 calories a day when everyone else can have 2000 or else i put on weight because exercise is out the question. But I know that some folk do eat all the pies. But do YOU know which one is which? NO..I didnt think so...

amybelle

"and I do think that other people would benefit from the blunt honesty of being told that they're overweight and should really change

Amybelle would you go and say this to an overweight man as well as an overweight woman or would you only offer this advice to another female. Just curious.

Right, so I informed her that I always thought she was shallow and said bye and Unfriended.

I'm not impressed with "shallow" as an insult, it's a myth that there are shallow people and deep people. She was just snide and unpleasant.
I would have just defriended. trading insults on facebook is for children.

YANBU, no reason to ever make comments about anyone's size.

X-posted, good on you!

although over eating is an addiction, and i agree with poster who said its very visable, its a difficult conditon, due to the fact that you HAVE to eat.

sometimes the fat person you see was once a very thin ill person, as obesity is the flip side to anorexia.

those that have the bypass op , a good proportion of them will put on weight and remain overweight, despite loosing vast amounts of weight. Again this major life changing op is not the magic wand people think it is.

I think that society is going to look upon the over weight and label them continually in negative views, such as 'lazy' 'uncontrolled' etc. when nothing could be further from the truth for vast majority.

health concerns do have a huge impact on weight, and exercise isnt always possible and for those with food restrictions for medical reasons, eating 'healthy' food can lead to intense pain.

What a horrible thing to do. Fair enough the woman would never know about it but what a horribly disrespectful thing to do. She is a human being, not a thing to be mocked.

The Daily mail has this sometimes, pictures of fat people in the street with their heads cut off, printed so we can laugh at how fat people are. It's a rotten way to behave.