to buy a caravan against DH's wishes

[Babieseverywhere]

Short Version
My DH thinks I am being very unreasonable but AIBU to want to sell MY things to fund a cheap old caravan which I will use ON MY OWN with our children, so they can have a holiday ?

Long Version
My DH works very hard to support our family, whilst I'm currently a SAHM to our 4 DC's. DH is happy with this arrangement and I will be returning to work in a couple of years time, when our youngest is at school.

Our budget does not cover luxuries like proper holidays and so we usually have a few day trips each year. However last year my MIL invited us to stay in a static caravan for a week with the DC's and we had a ball. Really enjoyed the beach, the children's playgrounds on site and the onsite swimming pool.

I have been trying to convince my DH to buy a tourer caravan to enable us to have cheap self catering holidays but he claims to hate tourer caravans though he has never had a holiday in one. He had previously claimed to hate static caravans too, but really enjoyed last years holiday in one...all I wanted him to do was have a go before making a decision on how he feels about it, but he is stubborn (like me) and he remain unconvinced.

I decided that I will sell anything I have of value which I paid for pre-children...my laptop, my mobile phone, my collection of baby slings (bought with maternity money for first child), mobile cashbacks etc and buy a cheap caravan.

Looking to spend (if I manage to raise this much money) £400 or less on a 4/5/6 berth one with a minimum of two double beds, to pile my small children on. If anyone has one they are getting rid of in the North West PM me.

I don't expect my DH to come away in this caravan, I will go on my own with the children. No, it won't be a relaxing holiday for me but the idea is to give the children a nice time and I'm on my own with all the children every school holiday anyway. I do hope DH might try it one day but I am buying it with no expectations of him ever setting foot in it, as he hates caravans.

DH is still against the idea of me even self funding a caravan and when I mention my caravan fund (barely started), he is very negative and is trying to put me off the idea...telling me I can't put the caravan on our drive...I could put the caravan on our double drive but this would mean I would have to park my car on the road which I am willing to do but he says no.

I aim to buy a couple of food tins every food shop through out the year, to put in the caravan, that is what we did as children. Had a tourer holiday where we ate tinned food for a week with fruit ! Then the money I would of spent on a food shop the week of the holiday, can cover site fees on a basic caravan park...we'll have so much fun.

Caravan insurance will be around a £5 a week/month (can't remember which) and this I will take out of the child benefit for our youngest which we have just started receiving and isn't currently in our budget IYSWIM, as it is a benefit for our children.

My father has already agreed IF i get a caravan he will be willing to tow it nearby for me (within a couple of hours drive). So I don't need to get a tow bar, nor worry about towing the caravan. I'm sure my father will help me set it up for me on site :)

DH's parents live permanently in a caravan travelling around Europe and England and I'm sure I could pitch up next to them for a few nights. They don't see enough of the grandchildren and I'm sure would love for me to do this. Likewise my own parents are retired and have a tourer and would love to spend a few days at the seaside with their grandchildren.

AIBU to buy a caravan ?

I see I was too late!

Further Update

Just travelling back from our first real camping holiday in our 30 yo folding camper to North Wales.

Verdict It was wonderful...rained most nights but the canvas kept us dry. Nice weather during the day...been to beach, swimming, castle, mine, gardens and playgrounds. Not forgetting the noisy disco on site, which the kids adored.

We got a last minute deal on the pitch, just £105 for five nights on an electric pitch, on a well known camp site. Including swimming, kids entertainment day and night and a short walk for the beach.

DH is converted and planning to bring a BBQ on our next family camping trip !

We have our eye on a cheap vintage matching awning which will match our camper and give us more living space, than our current modern porch awning that came with the camper.

So if you are lucky, you can spend less than £400 on a folding camper and enjoy a family holiday in it.

Brilliant! I was going to say initially (not aware of the time frame) that the best holiday I ever had was taking off with my mum camping in Cornwall for a week. Glorious weather and huge fun and not stress of dad fussing over everything and older brother being a twat!

It's a great idea just to take off when the weather is nice so you could still have a few extra holidays in the summer break as well as a distant one with DH. Tents and caravans are great, glad to see DH is a convert :-)

I was going to say £400 will be a really ropey van - folding tourer sounds better. I want a trailer tent...

A couple of breaks in a youth hostel would be better for the money. DH might go too so it would be a family holiday. There are some excellent hostels where you can book an ensuite room for 6 so no sharing with strangers. You can self cater or use their excellent cheap restaurants and iirc kids eat free. Hot water and showers are on tap.

We've been to several that are more like country houses and they had lots for the kids to do.

That's what I'd do with the money anyway.

Oops.

That'll teach me to read the whole fucking thread!

Well done OP and thanks for the update!

I admire your spirit and determination, I haven't been able to take my children on holiday for years,but alas camping is not my thing at all.

You have given me hope. I like your style and wish you all many happy holidays.

Brilliant update op. I actually remember the thread from 2 years ago. So nice to hear how the story continues. As children we had exactly the same tent 35 years ago. Much more comfy than a blow up mattress. I'm quite tempted myself.

Ah lovely update.

I remember when we bought our campervan initially dh was a bit sceptical (being more a traditional canvas man he wanted a tent) but he was soon converted and probably now loves the van more than I do! :) Sometimes you have to just take the plunge and try it.

Course good weather always helps when camping!

You don't even need a padlock to keep toddlers in, you just make sure when you zip the compartment that you leave the zipper at the top where they can't reach.

Firstly. Make sure that if you are buying an old caravan that it is road worthy. Also make sure that it is a suitable match weight for your car as otherwise it's dangerous. The other thing to consider is the actual manoeuvring of the van, can you do that by yourself?
I had an old van and I struggled it get the old legs up and down by myself and also to hitch up is not as easy as you might think by yourself.

Flipping heck I was on the wrong page! Just seen your update. Glad you have had a lovely time :)

Sounds a great site. What was the site called?

Fab update.

I was on this thread under a different name saying, no, get a nice tent, etc.

Since this thread I've actually bought a caravan and love it. Cost me 3.5k so not cheap but its great.

As for a licence to tow......if you passed your test prior to a certain year (maybe 1997) then you don't need a licence. If you passed after the year then you have to do a towing category test.

Oh and I can't physically push the caravan on my own (dh refuses to come caravanning) but I went on a towing course and I can reverse it anywhere!

We are old enough, not to need new caravan licenses, as we have this class on our licenses already but as we are now towing a trailer it is not relevant for us atm.

TBH having looked at various tent and caravan setups, I think we have the best one for our family. All the windows zip off to reveal netting, meaning it was cool on the sunny bits.

Heavy waxed canvas kept the bad rain out, no leaks even if you lean against the walls !

Having two double beds out all the time, meant space for the children to play or nap. Plus off the floor at night so not as cold and damp as camping in a tent.

The only minor issue was the modern porch awning which was the only storage area and just fitted travel cot for youngest's naps and our clothes. On the plus side it was adequate size and free.

Plus my mechanically minded husband sourced and fitted the relevant tow bar himself, to our main family car.

So if we wanted we could go again (money permitting) at the drop of a hat.

Have I made a good enough case for investing in a folding camper over a caravan and a tent ?

I read your thread when you first posted it. We, too, have a folding camper. We got it because we can't afford to holiday in hotels and DH wouldn't tent. Our car can't tow a caravan so a folding camper is the best option. We love it. We've been to Europe in it and are going again this year. It costs less to tow than a caravan - lower fuel costs and lower tolls. Do try and get a big awning. You can open the "living room" window and make it one big space.

We can store our camper at home where we couldn't store a van.

I'm glad you had a good time and that DH enjoyed it, too.

I am not convinced. We live in N.Wales and PIL have a little tourer permanently on a site an hour away. We have stayed in it many times and I really hate it.
When DC4 was two months old we stayed in PIL's friends luxury static for a week and that was awful too.

I feel it's just not a break as I am constantly having to put stuff away and clean things. I hate eating tinned foods or one pot meals everyday.
I don't like permanently having grass or sand or both everywhere.
I hate the smell of musty old bedding or having insects everywhere.
DH is over 6 foot and just seems to fill the space and then having the four kids running round or sprawled about the place makes me claustrophobic.
I am feeling clammy and stressed at the thought of it now!

Posted that too soon, PIL and SIL and BIL LOVE it. Maybe I am doing it wrong.

Hadn't read this thread before now but I'm really glad you had a great time and found a way of making it work for you.

We used to go to my gps static caravan every summer and I loved it. Got into tent camping with my DH and then 2 years ago we upgraded to a campervan which I love. I do like going to more upmarket holiday cottages or B&Bs but I struggle to justify the cost when I could camp for so much less.

Sorry if repeating but why don't you use the money to rent a static for a week or two? Then you don't have any of the hassles or ongoing costs of ownership. You said this van is only to last 2 years til you go to work, so seems like dead money anyway.

Sorry didn't RTFT