To want to meet up with fellow mums on the weekend?

[mamabellasworld]

As I work out of the house full time and have little time and energy to spare for meeting up with other mums and their kids during the week, I'd love to do so on the weekend.
Go for a coffee or take the kids somewhere fun. And have the opportunity to chat with other mothers, exchange experiences and generally have a good time. I don't expect anyone to devote entire days to me, I'm thinking a few hours on a Saturday or Sunday.
But now I started wondering if this is a terribly unusual or even unreasonable thing to ask.
As it turns out, for most mums I know the weekend seems off limits as far as spending time outside the nuclear family goes. Weekend is exclusively family time, no friends, just family.
How do you handle your weekends?
Are they exclusive family time or do you meet up (at leat occassionally) with other mums?

I can't think of anything worse if I'm 100% honest but different strokes and all that

I've never been one for 'Mummy friends', but I expect you're right in saying that most people will be spending time with their families at weekends.

Are there any clubs you can join in your area for like minded parents?

I very rarely meet up with "other mums"

I work FT too so life feels busy

I do meet up with friends occasionally, but not specifically "other mums".

DS is only little though so a bit young for playdates etc so maybe that will change but the idea of hanging out with people just because they also have a child doesnt appeal to me. It's also hard to fit meeting up with friends around DSs routine. Most of my friends dont have children so dont get it, and those that do seem to be equally busy or have clashing routines.

Maybe every other weekend I will meet friends for lunch and about once a month (maybe less) DM has DS over night so I can go out, although this is a recent development and I want to spend that time exclusively with DH at the moment.

I go out with my friends for a drink/meal once a month and I've banned them all from 'Mum talk'

20 minutes is acceptable and then after that, they're fined £1 to put in the drink kitty for saying anything even remotely 'Mumsy'

Not exclusive family time for us! I think we're maybe unusual though, so I sympathise.

Our weekends are older son's football, which has dad has todo as I can't drive ( cunning ) usually both me and partner doing work for the next week, but I'm on mat leave for 4 more weeks, house jobs and whatever comes up really.

I quite often meet friends who are also not exclusive family timers at the weekend, or partner does, unless we've planned a visit to my or his parents. Older son usually meeting friends or doing homework if not footballing.

You can join my gang if you like and you're near!

I wasn't referring to people I only want to spend time with because we have being a mother in common.
I rather meant friends or relatively good acquaintances who happen to be mothers too.

Not specifically mum friend's as others have said though! And my children have a huge age gap between them, so if you're looking for like minded "mum friends" mine are almost definitely too old or too young!

Rogue apostrophe, thanks, iPad...

I have always had a strict 'no mum talk' when I meet up with friends. Each to their own though.

Wow, that's so interesting! I seem to be very different then... :)
Maybe it's all because I am the only mother within my close circle of friends and I admit that I miss someone to go into the "mumsey stuff" with.
Well, seems I won't have an easy time finding someone.

We tend to do immediate family stuff on a weekend as DH works silly hours at times and we don't see him much during the week sometimes. If we see friends, it is usually all families together.

I would like to meet up with friends (whether or not they are 'mums') at weekends but I do agree with you mama that a lot of people see weekends as sacred 'family time and won't do anything without their partner and/or children.

I have just commented on a similar thread, my DH and I often do separate things at weekends and I would be very happy to go out with friends - and I do sometimes - but I know a lot of people seem to think you can't invite just one parent out as everyone is busy with their own family (sorry, probably haven't expressed that very well). I know from reading threads on Mumsnet that this can be particularly difficult for single parents who would like to get out at weekends.

I have other FT working mum friends and every other week some combination of us goes to one of our homes for the children to play and the parents to hang out a bit, usually c. 3 to 6 pm time slot so it includes a real meal for the children and the parents have tea and biscuits, or maybe a beer and slice of pizza. We've also met up for a walk and a pub lunch before, and been round people's houses on a "meet our new pet" invitation a few times.

Why not try inviting a family you like to a BBQ or fish and chips supper and see how it goes? If you are thinking of getting a pet, "come and meet our new puppy/kitten" is very popular! Anyway, I am sure you will get some takers.

YANBU about the "mums who only want to see family not friends at the weekend" thing.

I don't have children, and I never see my friends who have kids any more because I am at work in the week and I'm not welcome at the weekend: they only want to do family stuff.

No suggestions - but I sympathise.

Every so often we'll meet at the weekend for drinks, but only a few times a year tbh. There's a couple of families we might meet at the weekend if DH and their DH and our kids get on. Sometimes we'll invite couples over for dinner, but again only if DH has anything in common with their DH! Other than that I'll only see "mum" friends at the weekend if DH is away - a couple of them have DH's who work every weekend, so there's always one around.

Weekends are for family time really, as well as a chance to exercise, etc. Or seeing old friends from different towns/ grandparents visiting, etc.

I guess I wasn't that clear - we see lots of friends at the weekend, but "mum" friends where only I know the other mum, will tend to be in the week. Does that make sense. We don't have extended family near by, so friends are v important to us!

DH frequently works saturdays and I'd love to meet up with some of my friends with kids then.

However as you say the weekend is viewed as family time by almost everyone I know so it doesn't happen (and tbf if DH was about on a Saturday I'd want to spend the day as a family too. The kids don't see him much on work days.).

I think it's quite normal to spend time with friends who are also Mums at the weekend. I see quite a lot of my friends at the weekend, sometimes as a family with DPs aswell, sometimes Mums and kids, sometimes just Mums on our own having coffee/wine etc. Definitely isn't sacred family time here, and can't think of anyone I know who would see family only at the weekend. Maybe we are unusually sociable? I don't really think so though.

I wouldn't tend to meet up with 'mum friends' at weekends. Would sometimes go out on a friday night, with kids left at home, but would tend to do 'mum friend with kids' things during the week, or whole family meet ups at the weekends.

My dh works most weekends, and weekdays to for that matter. I would love to meet up with friends, either those with kids or with out but I agree with you that most never come out at weekends to meet up and look at you slightly odd when you suggest it.

Yes,I meet up with friends who have kids at the weekends, is that what you mean?

Yanbu, at all.
I don't specifically have "mum friends", but I tend to meet up with friends during the weekend. Often we meet up with children in tow. The dc play, the adults catch up.

OP, I think there's a gap in the market there, tbh.

I work full time but am self employed, and work from home, so I see a lot of other mums at mum and baby groups/soft play/in the park etc during the day when I go with DS. I'd say they are 'mum friends' in that I only know them because I see them at these places, and we've met because we have kids.

I've met some lovely people and other mums are a very good source of info about activities/schools etc. The other mums are all either working part time or SAHMs, for the time being.

For friends who work full time with small children, they only seem to have the chance to meet other mums at pick up and drop off at nursery, and then everyone's on a tight schedule, and it's not like chatting in the park. Really, their only chance to do a mums outing, with other kids, is going to be the weekend... but I think you are right, weekends for most families do seem to be nuclear or extended family time.

I guess Saturday morning activities might be a way to meet other mums with a similar schedule and see if they are more flexible about weekends... I know what you mean, though, it is hard. I'd meet up! my weekends aren't any different to my week days tbh - I have to work part of every day to manage the work/parent thing but in practice that means we don't have 'nuclear family' weekends.

I think for a lot of families, the idea of 'playdates' on weekends are not on as it's the only time a lot of Dads get to see their DCs, (I know quite a few families where the DH has left for work by the time the DCs get up and gets home either just at bathtime or after the DCs are in bed) and only time to do things all together that need doing, so the time does get ringfenced.

Also non working mothers or mothers who work part time do have time in the week to do that sort of meet up so are more likely to have allocated weekends for 'family'.

I find it hard as DH often has to work on weekends, my non-parent friends don't want to do toddler friendly things and my 'mum' friends are often doing family stuff - or their DH's have the DCs, and they don't want to spend their childfree time with my child! I have now found a few mum friends who have DHs who work some weekends and try to compare diaries to find matching 'on our own' weekends.

We see friends at the weekends, but I wouldn't organise to meet up with a mum from school or preschool at the weekend as I tend to do that during the week.
Weekends are for friends of the family, extended family and just mooching around at home the 4 of us.

DH and I do do things separately, but that tends to be catching up with friends from further afield or hobbies etc.

I'm afraid we're one of those families who ring-fence the weekend for family. DH and I hardly see each other in the week and he only sees DD a bit in the mornings so weekends are precious family time for us. I can see how difficult it would be for you as that does seem to be the norm amongst my circle.