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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think that a man who abandoned his pregnant wife and children and went to live in another country, leaving them with no means of support, has no right to get on his high horse about "Govt Handouts"

48 replies

Inertia · 12/09/2012 21:11

On FB (I know, I know).

Relative of mine has become Mr Republican Party, banging on about how he supports himself and other people shouldn't expect government handouts.

It's easy to support yourself when you've fucked off to another country leaving your pregnant wife, your children, your debts, the mortgage on the new house you insisted on moving to; it's easy to pay your own way when you regularly fail to send any maintenance payments. Working not an option for her though, with childcare costs far exceeding what she could earn.

Luckily we still have (just about) a support system in place to make sure that the children he dumped don't starve, and both sides of the family are able to offer some practical and financial support. But how fucking dare he begrudge support to families in exactly the same position as his own children!

OP posts:
DoMeDon · 12/09/2012 21:12

YABu because you should pick him up on it - release the hands.

Fakebook · 12/09/2012 21:12

Fuck the family row, I'd be giving him a piece of my mind. Are you the pregnant wife?

CoolaSchmoola · 12/09/2012 21:14

I'd be unleashing the hounds of hell across his FB page.

He doesn't deserve your concern about causing an issue - nail the bastard to the floor!

larks35 · 12/09/2012 21:14

YABU stop sitting on your hands and cause the biggest bloody hoo-ha you can!

He sounds like the shittest of shits. Make sure you tell him the score.

AnyFucker · 12/09/2012 21:14

Yanbu

I wouldn't keep my gob shut though

nor have him on my fb

DontmindifIdo · 12/09/2012 21:16

Sod the family row - put your last two paragraphs word for word as a comment on his post.

Hopefully a few of his US friends who don't know what he's done will see it.

MammaTJisWearingGold · 12/09/2012 21:17

Do not sit on your hands, but time it carefully, so he won't be on FB for a while and it gets maximum exposure. Grin

SoftKittyWarmKitty · 12/09/2012 21:24

Post it as a response, he sounds like he deserves it. Do as the poster above says and post it when it's 2am where he is, so it gets at least 6 hours on there before he no doubt pulls it.

DoMeDon · 12/09/2012 21:27

I would comment along the lines of 'oh I'm glad there are hand outs - there's this single mum I know who wouldn't cope without them - her DH ran off to USA and doesn't pay her a penny. He's a right wanker - oops Blush No offence'

helenthemadex · 12/09/2012 21:29

bloody hell when I saw this I thought you were someone I knew and talking about my ex quite a few similarities!!

post something as reply so others can see and smirk at his hypocrisy

even if a post is deleted people who have posted a reply will get email notifications with the message in Grin

NellyJob · 12/09/2012 21:30

what an arsepiece, definitely post a comment.

Inertia · 12/09/2012 21:35

No, I'm not the wife (the baby she was expecting when he left her has now outgrown babyhood) but she has done an incredible job. The 'man' in question is a a close blood relative of mine (should probably have name change to avoid outage with this one!)

TBH he has been told over and over how unacceptable his behaviour is by other family members- his parents, his siblings- but he just refuses to accept he's ever done anything wrong, says he has the right to live the life that makes him happy. But yes, it's a good point that other people won't know all this when he starts preaching about handouts. And you're right that timing is key!

OP posts:
redwhiteandblueeyedsusan · 12/09/2012 21:36

thereneeds to be some sort of comment about ho he supports himself... and not his children.

CaliforniaLeaving · 12/09/2012 21:37

Do it, maybe it's time his new friends knew what a tosser he is.

Bossybritches22 · 12/09/2012 21:38

Or post the well know British saying "pots calling the kettle black" Grin

What a hypocritical arse.

Inertia · 12/09/2012 21:46

DoMeDon - spot on.

Helenthemadex isn't it depressing that there's so many of these shits about?

OP posts:
WildWorld2004 · 12/09/2012 21:46

I would definately tell him how you feel. Even if he doesnt listen every one of his fb friends will read it. I absolutely hate people who abandon their kids. I fucking hate people who abandon their kids & then act like they are perfect.

Inertia · 12/09/2012 21:49

I do need to say something don't I?

I think the last time I responded to one of his posts (rather than a PM) was in response to something that could be seen as racist, and he pulled that thread. (Is it a thread on FB? Am v incompetent on it).

OP posts:
Guiltypleasures001 · 12/09/2012 21:54

Hang on a minute you dont have to say anything hun.

throw a few pms out and I am sure others would take up the mantle
job done....

cbeebiesinducedcoma · 12/09/2012 21:54

Wow what a piece of work I hope you confront and tell us the response Grin

TheCrackFox · 12/09/2012 21:55

I would say something because he lives far away and some of his shiney, new Anmerican friends might like to know what an arsehole he is.

NellyJob · 12/09/2012 21:57

yes do it!!

RandomMess · 12/09/2012 21:57

You could just say something along the lines of "I'm glad there are benefits here otherwise x y z would have ended up in the workhouse as that what we would have instead for children where 1 parent absconded and no longer supported them"

SlightlySuperiorPeasant · 12/09/2012 22:00

YABU. Last 2 paragraphs of your OP should be attached to that status.

Jux · 12/09/2012 22:01

Get those hands out from under you and cause a family row. Go on. You know you want to, and you'd be morally right to expose his hypocrisy.

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