Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to ask why people don't follow the 'usual' complaint system?

27 replies

juniper904 · 11/09/2012 22:05

If I order a pizza, and it's late, I call the branch. I talk to an employee, and they pass me onto a manager who deals with my issue and offers a discount next time etc. I would not contact head office.

If I am in Tesco and an offer doesn't go through the till, I go to customer service. I would not contact head office.

In most walks of life, people complain to the next one up in the chain of command.

So why is this not true with parents and schools? Why do most parents on MN seem to go straight to the head teacher rather than talking to the teacher directly? Doesn't the teacher deserve the right to defend/ explain his/her actions?

In my experience, if a parent goes to the head, then the head tells the staff off. The head rarely listens to the staff member explaining their side. This works well for parents, I suppose, but maybe the member of staff has a reason...?

So, when parents have an issue with a teacher, why can't they just tell them?

OP posts:
NotaDisneyMum · 11/09/2012 22:08

Most schools have a complaints policy that state just this - the first port of call should be the teacher concerned.

If the Headteacher engages with a complaining parent who hasn't followed the correct school procedure, then I don't think that the parents should be criticised for taking advantage of the head teachers poor leadership Wink

Original poster
juniper904 · 11/09/2012 22:13

... and yes, I order pizza hut and shop at Tesco. My child will probably be called Kilee-Mar'e according to MN!

OP posts:
Jinsei · 11/09/2012 22:17

I have never had cause to complain to the school at all, but if I did, I would talk to the teacher first unless the teacher had done something completely outrageous and inappropriate, as that would destroy my faith in his/her ability to deal with the complaint properly. And some things just need to be escalated in any case.

FWIW, this is the same approach that I would take anywhere else - minor issues would be fed back to the waiter/shop assistant etc, but if it was something more serious, I'd go to the manager. Isn't this the norm?

JeezyOrangePips · 11/09/2012 22:21

But surely your examples are not good examples?

The head teacher is the manager (pizza place)

The head office is the education department, not the head teacher.

It would depend entirely on the complaint.

Should I complain to a teacher if a different employee was out of order? No, that teacher has no authority over staffing issues.

Jinsei · 11/09/2012 22:22

Sorry, that didn't come out very well, but hopefully you get what I mean. It's all about trust in my view. Normally, if there was a problem that affected my dd in school, I would talk to the teacher about it as i would trust that she'd want to resolve the problem. However, if the fundamental problem was such that my trust in the teacher had been broken, I would go to the HT instead.

Original poster
juniper904 · 11/09/2012 22:22

Jinsei unfortunately not. If you read the threads in AIBU and Primary Education, then lots of people complain straight to the Head, and others encourage this. In my own experience, my Head always backs up the parents and bad mouths the staff. She went so far once that she confirmed a parent's worry that the planning wasn't stretching their DC... she hadn't even seen the planning. The parent then told the teacher who had written the planning and who taught the child, who was livid that the Head would make such comments. Professionalism is not her strength.

I had a parent complain about our homework system, but she went straight to the Head rather than ask me about it. Ergo I get an earful from the Head, even though we set homework according to the school's policy which the Head wasn't aware of Sigh.

OP posts:
JumpingThroughMoreHoops · 11/09/2012 22:22

In my experience, if a parent goes to the head, then the head tells the staff off. The head rarely listens to the staff member explaining their side

Thats what the Head tell the parent. Grin

Do you really think schools pay any attention to parents and their petty, infantile complaints?

maybenow · 11/09/2012 22:23

because if you have a problem with somebody you almost always go to an arbitrator rather than the person in question (customer services, manager, ofcom, etc.)

cardibach · 11/09/2012 22:25

Do you work in a school, Jumping?
I can assure you that in many, many schools a parental complaint will be tqaken as gospel however, petty and infantile it may be.

WorraLiberty · 11/09/2012 22:26

I agree with NotaDisneyMum

In my DS's school, if a parent goes straight to the Head without taking it up with the teacher first, the Head will cheerfully take that parent to the teacher and the 3 of them will discuss the issue.

Original poster
juniper904 · 11/09/2012 22:26

My Head falls over backwards to accommodate parents because she's scared of them. Incidentally, her staff leave in droves.

OP posts:
numptymark1 · 11/09/2012 22:27

if I have a problem with homework, reading books, friendshi groups etc, then I will go to the teacher

if I have a problem with the teacher, then I would go to the head

using your example, if I had a problem with a sales assistant, I would tell their manager

there's no difference

cornzy · 11/09/2012 22:29

It's often difficult to meet with the teacher. Teachers are often busy before and after school. Sometimes it's easier to go to the Head.

Original poster
juniper904 · 11/09/2012 22:29

JeezyOrangePips in Pizza Hut, the manager is just in charge of one branch. If you complain to head office (ie the national address) then you will get a whole load of freebies and the branch will be told off.

My line manager is not the Head. There is the KS2 manager, the assistant head, the deputy head and then the Head herself.

OP posts:
Jinsei · 11/09/2012 22:31

Then your HT sounds extremely unprofessional, OP. Presumably there is some sort of grievance process that you could follow if you chose.

I don't think our school is as you describe. For the most part, the parents seem a pretty sensible lot, and discuss any concerns with the class teacher. I have heard of parents going to the head if they haven't been happy with the teacher's response, and the general feeling is that she is (publically, at least) very supportive of her teachers. And I assume that she is also supportive behind closed doors, too, as the teachers generally seem a happy, motivated bunch and the staff turnover is extremely low.

The HT doesn't win too many brownie points from the parents this way, but she's not there to win a popularity contest in my view - it's her job to run an effective and successful school, and I'd say she does it very well.

JumpingThroughMoreHoops · 11/09/2012 22:33

Sometimes it's easier to go to the Head.

really? at secondary? they are usually blocked in by a raft of deputy and assistant heads, counter ringed by extended SLT, with yet another ring of HOYs, then form tutors. No-one get to see the Head.

I realise in little schools with >1000 pupils you might glimpse the Head, but in reality, s/he is so removed from the business of teaching and has become a corporate business manager even the rank and file staff don't see the head

Original poster
juniper904 · 11/09/2012 22:34

The HT doesn't win too many brownie points from the parents this way, but she's not there to win a popularity contest in my view - it's her job to run an effective and successful school, and I'd say she does it very well.

Well, yes- that. But my Head is too concerned with being liked. She is a lovely, caring and compassionate woman, but she is not a manager. She wants 'everyone to be happy' but by everyone she normally means the parents. Then she gets herself down because all they do is shout at her.

packing my bags already

OP posts:
cornzy · 11/09/2012 22:34

do parents know who the 'line manager' is juniper?

Original poster
juniper904 · 11/09/2012 22:35

They know who the senior leaders are. And JumpingThroughMoreHoops, I work in primary so the hierarchy is a bit easier to decipher.

OP posts:
cornzy · 11/09/2012 22:36

I'm thinking of primary school when I think of it being easier to go to the Head. In Secondary I would not try to get hold of the Head. Totally different set up.

Jinsei · 11/09/2012 22:37

Common problem with managers in all sectors OP - people wanting to be liked and therefore failing to do what is required of them as a manager.

I'd be looking for another school if I were you. :)

OutragedAtThePriceOfFreddos · 11/09/2012 22:38

I think there is a tendancy to think that things are more likely to change if we talk to the head. I work in a primary school so know the system better and would talk to a teacher, but with certain problems I would go to the head because the head will be the one to do something about it.

Also, as a nation, we are not good at confrontation. If a parents problem is with the teacher then it's easier and more comfortable to discuss that with someone else, rather than the person who is perceived to be at fault. It's more about having someone else to go to, rather than going to the boss iyswim.

And you need to remember that this is our children and their care and their education we are talking about here. It's slightly more important than a pizza!

JeezyOrangePips · 11/09/2012 22:38

Juniper, fair enough. In the school my kids went to the line manager was the head. There was nobody else but the teacher or the head to speak to.

Where I live, the head is in charge of one school, just as the pizza hut manager is in charge of one branch.

I guess if your op was a bit clearer on the hierarchy of your school it would be easier for me to make a fair call.

Original poster
juniper904 · 11/09/2012 22:39

I have 190 days left. Not that I'm counting...

I think my Head is a lovely person, but she is not Head material.

OP posts:
Original poster
juniper904 · 11/09/2012 22:40

OutragedAtThePriceOfFreddos getting a pizza on time is pretty important!

OP posts: