to ask why some parents have to speak to the class teacher every morning?

[MarysBeard]

Especially when the general rule is to communicate via the reading book, the office if a routine matter, or if you must, to speak to the teacher at the end of the school day, and if it's something that takes more than five minutes, make an appointment.

I would expect it in reception, but by Year 3 surely parents should know not to be standing around monopolising the teachers' attention in the morning, delaying the children getting into school. Also (apart from in reception) the kids are meant to line up and the parents stand behind some cones after the bell has gone. Yet some parents still hang around the lines of kids after the bell has gone, sometimes getting in the way of the lines of kids getting into school. It's always the same people you see doing both, in spite of repeated reminders in the newsletters. I often feel sorry for the teaching staff in the mornings & wish that some parents would just let them get on with it (as most do!)

urk, i really hope no-one at dds school thinks I am one of these pathetic, needy, attention seeking bitches!

they need a job

You see THIS is why I like communication books...

This year they are preferring to do handover chats verbally though I do try to keep out of the way in the morning as my son is indicating that he wants to line up on his own.

Have done a variety of communication methods and this is the best actually though I don't particularly like the snide looks I am getting because the teacher makes a point of talking to me every day.

Love the comment about 'I can spot a SEN parent'... Do we have elbows that bend the wrong way or something?

There were some issues with dd1's home life when she was at primary school so I sometimes mentioned something to the teacher before school. On the days when there was anything lengthy I needed to tell her, I either waited until after school or wrote it down so she could read it when she had time.

My dd's needs didn't need to hold up the other 25 children.

Dayshift - I think she meant that the SEN parents generally only bring up important, valid things, whereas others just ramble on about everything their darling offspring has done right down to how many times it farted.

This is one of the rare times, at our school, when teaching staff are available to chat there and then for a minute or two.

Some parents need to chat to the teacher or TA due to an ongoing issue where regular updates are required. This might be to do will all manner of things from medical, home issues, behaviour, learning, SEN, .... various.

Obviously there is the odd parent who just wants to monopolise the teacher's time but ime it is very few.

Gah, drives me nuts, its the same parents gathering around the teacher every morning like wannabe teens round Simon Cowell. Fine if you have something important to say, not if you are just wittering on.

I've never noticed any parents regularly monopolising teachers' time unnecessarily in the morning but maybe that's because I always assume that there is a good reason for the conversation.

I have had to tell teachers things which other posters might disapprove of like "her consent form is in her bag" "she fell out with xxx at playtime yesterday" or "she has lost her water bottle". This is because, despite being verbally very articulate and academically able, her organisational skills are well behind her age and she needs a lot of support in her social interaction.

I now realise that other parents overhearing my comments may well have had conversations about me similar to this thread and it doesn't feel very good. They won't have been able to see my DD's disability for themselves

I now understand why I have heard about comments being made about how pushy I was and that my DD got more support than she needed last year.

BTW I asked for a communication book for three years before the school decided that the teachers would have time to read/write in one.

Queen

How would she know unless she was eaves dropping?

Tbh goldmandra none of those issues sound like good reasons to be having daily morning discussions ith your dd's teacher. Surely in this case where there is clear SEN, the teacher is aware of the issues? Strategies should be in place to avoid this need for daily chats e.g. Teacher or TA checks your dd's bag for forms, or you hand directly to the office, or there is a pre arranged day of the week where your dd is gien the opportunity to remember o hand stuff in. Disputes at playtime- just write a note? Lost water bottle, go in with her at the end of school to find it ?

LittleGold your judgemental response is exactly what I am talking about.

They may well not be good reasons for conversations with teachers if you child doesn't have the same needs as my DD but when you add severe anxiety disorder to the mix it is important to get things right in school.

The strategies you are talking about are all very well if the teachers are doing their jobs properly. Sadly, in common with many parents of children with SEN, I have had to fight long and hard to get my DD's difficulties recognised and appropriate support put in place e.g. for the TA to start checking DD's bag for forms or remind her to look for them. You can't make all this happen without the cooperation of the school and I didn't get that until my DD got a statement in her final year there.

What happens and what should happen are not often the same thing when you're the parent of child with SEN.

I have to agree with Gold on this one. My conversations probably seemed trivial to other people but they were necessary and very useful.

Littlegold what a ridiculous comment

Most of these comments could just as easily & efficiently be made to the receptionist with a written note, if privacy desired. I understand better if school doesn't even have a receptionist, and with a handful of truly highly sensitive children.

There is no privacy if you try to speak at the door or in the morning with other parents close by or their children squeezing past or ready to start world war III. There are so many details for staff to keep track of in the morning, I wouldn't expect staff to remember most of these little messages unless written down, anyway, or of very obvious urgency.

If I have anything important to discuss I ask for a phone call or wait my turn at end of the day.

Littlegold - personally at my school we'd rather the parent did come and tell us. Besides, it is far quicker and impacts less on class time to have a 30 second update direct from mum than someone having to do all those individual checks to ascertain everything.

Why is it rediculous? Goldmandra is agreeing with me- strategies should be in place and she has reported having to fight long and hard to get the correct level of support. I stand by what I say, in such a case where there is SEN, the parent shoud not be having to have conversations with the teacher first thing inthe morning.

lljkk - where I work the idea of the receptionist dealing with it all just wouldn't work at all for many reasons.

Can receptionist pass on notes in sealed envelopes to the right people, Hula?
I know sometimes only a morning chat will do, but otherwise I just find as much as possible, leave any issues until end of the day. There's usually much more time to deal with them then.

I think a few of our parents look forward to social time with their DC teacher each day.

lljkk - would just be a nightmare. Our receptionists are already so busy and especially first thing int he morning. There is always a big queue there anyway as it is where dinner money is paid for, school uniform orders inc bags and water bottles.. It is also where everyone has to sign in if visiting school and for supply and helpers...the list goes on tbh. definitely not where we want other parents adding to the queue already there.

But then we have less time at the end of the day. The morning time is longer as there is a 10 minute window where parents come into the classroom between the doors opening and the morning bell going. Guess it is just our "end of day" time that some other schools have.

Well, I was thinking about this today, when I dropped DS1 off early for a club. Tried to drop and run, but was caught by his class teacher who wanted a chat.

Then, at a sportsclub, DS2's teacher cane over at the end, for a chat.

Maybe some teachers just like a chat too.

With dd1 it has to be a talk with the teacher, rather than the receptionist, because it is the going into class that is the problem! So to some of the the other parents (according to the views on here - which doesn't seem to be reflected by the parents at our school thankfully!) it might seem as though I am talking about trivialities, but it is the way that the teacher and I have worked out how to get dd1 into class.

llijk

The teacher was the person who needed the information, not the receptionist. Why would it be better to put an extra person in the chain, creating extra work and the possibility of a Chinese Whisper effect and risking the message not getting through at all? Would it really have been worth all that just because some judgemental parents might not like to see me speaking to the teacher each morning?

To be honest I had better things to worry about on the mornings I was trying to get two school avoidant, autistic, anxious daughters to go into schools which were choosing not to meet their needs effectively. Cats bum faces on the other mums would have been the least of my worries!

Don't judge me until you have walked one of those mornings in my shoes.

In reality littlegold it doesn't always work like that. Yes you are right to say strategies should be in place, it really isn't that simple sometimes, it depends on how good the school is, and believe me it makes me so that some schools are so slack

I apologise as I am very angry about a couple of incidents that happened at ds's school today

I'm a bit late - but I was agreeing with Goldmantra not littlegold.