to think it's unnecessary to announce that you're clearing out your Facebook friends?

[autumnlights12]

yesterday evening a friend announced that she was having a friends clear out.
Sure enough, this morning she's defriended me. Which is fine, if a little annoying because of the prior announcement. Why do people announce their intention to do this? It grinds my gears.

Also I'm glad my F-list is 90% male, you don't get any of that annoying "hun" business!

I have under 30 "friends". If any of these (except the teenage relatives who might justifiably no longer want me in their social circle for gossiping) deleted me after announcing they were making a cull I would no longer view them as a friend and presume they no longer liked me.
I'd rather they just quietly deleted me.

Ice lolly, lol, you just made me snort my coffee! x

I put on Facebook that I thought it was fuckwittery, esp. what a few people id which was to reconfirm to them you wanted to be their friend, or risk being "binned"! None of my friends have done it since funny they seem to have all disappeared :) and I got about 25 "likes" for that status.

Simple solution... Make some more friends, preferably ones which aren't fuckwits.

not sure what to say next time I see her. We both belong to a group and see each other from time to time. I assume that if someone removes you in this way, but keeps others from said group, they're trying to tell me something?

Yes I think they are. I'd say nothing but be more distant.

Vickles did I sound like a madwoman?!

Yikes. FB really is the be all and end all now isn't it? Not directed at you so much OP as I know people in real life who take it all so seriously. Deleted from FB? You are hated! Its the real deal. Friends no more. Back in the 90's we had no way of saying "Just in case you haven't noticed I am no longer your friend".

When DH became very ill I did a very apologetic version of this on my wall and then a while later removed everyone who hadn't wished my DD well or supported us at all in her long illness, and also those we are not close to I had picked up since. I didn't want people in the second category to feel offended so explained it was due to a family situation. Those in the first category I didn't give a fuck really. It isn't appropriate to have anyone I and DH don't trust on there when we may be sharing details of his medical condition on there to our family and friends abroad.

but Farlo, why would you have someone you don't trust on there in the first place?

I had people there I knew from support groups, who I was fine sharing general trivia with but not my DH's health concerns.

I have fb culls every now and again as I don't like to have too many friends.

I do announce them but only after I've done them. Its just a tongue in cheek congrats on how much I wuv you that you're still here. :o

I used to see the "I'm having a clear out" status updates regular. I was using that account for a "support" group for the illness I have. I got so fed up of it I closed that account (I had quite a few people to remove it was easier making a new account) and made a new account.

The worst ones I find is "So unhappy", "So Happy", "More shit in my life why do I never have an easy life" etc etc then a few comments "whats up" then the person says "can't say here I will PM"

I'm pleased I don't see anything like that now.

ImPeppa, i had a mate like that - constant moaning about how shit her actually not that bad life is - and had a serious chat with her about strategies to beat depression... She now posts loads of positive stuff to "fake it til she makes it" and is beating the Black Dog!

I am clearly the only person who thinks this is a good thing (though admittedly I do a minority social network, not FB). If you really are having a clearout for decluttering purposes then surely if you don't announce it all the blameless but tedious people who post too much about F1 will either get paranoid about what they personally have done to deserve deletion or think you're a bitch.

No excuse for "Congratulations on surviving the cull" posts though.

This bugs me a lot. Why bother pre-warning people that you may/may not be on their list anymore? How many of the people that write a status like that actually do it? I deleted my account this morning. Did i warn anyone? Nope. Just did it. This way no one can come to be begging me to stay pff...if they want me they know my number.

But surely the whole point of FB is to have a list of long lost friends and distant relatives plus be able to spy on old boyfriends etc. I see and speak regularly to my "real" friends/close family and don't need FB to know what is going on in their lives. FB is a good way of keeping in touch with people whom you might never see again.

Someone did this recently "if you want me to keep you, say now or forever hold your peace", I thought brilliant, she's going to defriend me but I survived the cull somehow. She seems nice enough (never met her in person, I joined her bumps group) but she's always posting kooky posey photos of herself, which is annoying as she's very pretty. I may defriend but we live quite close and might bump into each other!

YANBU