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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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To be annoyed that taxi ranks don't let families in first.

618 replies

LittleTurtle · 10/09/2012 11:39

More like a rant really, sorry if it was covered before.

When we came back from holiday with the Eurostar, we went to the taxi rank. I had DC3 on the sling on my front (4 months), a backpack on my back and the babybag on the side, while holding the hands of DC1 and 2 (aged 2 and 4). DH had 2 large suitcases, a backpack and bag. I told DH we will go to the front immediately because priority is given to families and seriously with all our baggage you could tell we were not taking the piss.

When we got there, there were the paralympic guides helping people get into the taxis, when she turned to us and asked : 'Oh sorry, who came first'. There were these Carrie Bradshaw-like fashionistas to go in front of us. I told the guide that we just came in, but usually families with babies usually go first. She told me she never heard of that, and that unless we were disabled or something..........
Then one of the fashionistas took a look at all our baggage and said it's fine we can go, at which her friend said : 'Oh no, are you sure?'. Eventually we were let in, but I could not help but say to my husband, one of the fashionistas look great on the outside, but just cold on the inside. What kind of inconsiderate society have we become?

In France, there are signs all over main taxi ranks, that you let the pregnant, disabled, families with babies and tots, etc. go in before. We even naturally get called to the front by the usher as we arrive.
I realised that people in london are less keen, one day we did that, and some guy rushed to the taxi to go in front of us, and the taxi driver turned him away and told him : 'don't you see those people need more help?'.

Even before I was pregnant and had kids, I always left the lift, seats etc. to the mums and elders, so all this behaviour surprises me.

OP posts:
garlicnutty · 10/09/2012 14:37

I think I may have bumped into you, your family and your baggage at Waterloo once, OP.

Not too many annoying queue-jumpers have stuck in my mind, but this one did because of her overbearing sense of entitlement. Everyone else in the very long queue (another family included) felt equally put out. I had cystitis and had already been waiting ages.

For the record, it's usual to ask a queue if you may jump, giving your reasons. We're British, we'll probably say Yes. YABVU to assume privilege.

LittleTurtle · 10/09/2012 14:38

But why is this such an issue with UK women? How come it's allowed in other countries, without a twit?

OP posts:
D0oinMeCleanin · 10/09/2012 14:39

I think in the UK most women wouldn't want to be assumed as less capable or able than another person just because they have children with them.

If I was ushered to the front of a queue because I was with my children I'd be worried that people thought I could not effectively parent and control my children sufficiently.

They also believe it is beneficial for children to realise from an early age that sometimes you have to wait for things and that sometimes they are not the most important person in the room.

DolomitesDonkey · 10/09/2012 14:39

Can I have a list of countries where I'd be treated like a goddess on account of my uterus bearing fruit? It's just I live in one of those foreign countries and we don't even have P&C parking.

MadBusLady · 10/09/2012 14:39

Who's been a twit? Let me at 'em!

Jins · 10/09/2012 14:40

I explained ^^ OP

I like certainty and your proposal takes it away and may delay me getting back to my family which are more important to me than your need to get a taxi first

LittleTurtle · 10/09/2012 14:40

Don'ts say I am not a UK woman. Because I am. Just wondering why it's such a big deal?

OP posts:
Sirzy · 10/09/2012 14:40

Queuing isn't an issue for most UK women, we dont believe that our needs are greater simply because we have children well some do but thankfully most of us are sensible

TwinkleReturns · 10/09/2012 14:41

OP see it from the other angle - how would it be fair to everyone else who has commitments, work, funerals, hospital apptmnts, siblings to collect from school and general stuff if they were made to wait for you plus kids. Its not about people challenging you if you havent realised they are disabled and have queue jumped. The VERY REASON why we have a queuing system and dont judge on appearance is because people have a whole plethra of commitments and situations which should not need to be explained and justified in order to get on with day to day life.

The (non-existent) systems you think exists everywhere and which we should use in the UK would be incredibly inconvenient and disruptive to the lives of far more people than would benefit by allowing families priority.

It is not convenient to have each person queuing for any given thing, list their reasons to needing priority and being ranked accordingly therefore we queue. This is utter common sense and your inability to grasp this makes me think you are either living in a bubble or dont want to extend compassion to anyone other than yourself.

frayededges · 10/09/2012 14:41

oh no i have to go do the school run please wait for me so i don't miss anything going to be late do you think they would send a taxi as a priority let me see how many points i've got damn not enough time for the arithmetic........

garlicnutty · 10/09/2012 14:41

How come it's allowed in other countries?

Other countries don't 'do' queueing like we do, OP. You've just been lucky some even more overbearing character didn't push you out the way. Perhaps they thought you didn't understand the rules, being an ill-mannered Brit?

Sirzy · 10/09/2012 14:41

Littleturtle, are you able to read? There have been nearly 400 posts yet you are still struggling to understand why you are in the wrong

Jins · 10/09/2012 14:42

LittleTurtle have you actaully read any of the posts explaining why we don't agree with you?

You wouldn't need to keep asking then

Kayano · 10/09/2012 14:42

You've mentioned
One country

So if a man has 3 kids alone he shouldn't get as much help as a
Woman with 3 kids ? Why are you making this about women when all its about is PUSHING IN THE QUEUE

Hmm

It's an issue because other people
Could be in greater need than you but don't look it so the fairest way for everyone is a queue, an actual queue that lines up in order of arrival and not something you can ignore because you are an entitled Diva mother.

Believe me, probs half the women in that queue will be mothers themselves and their need for a taxi is no less than yours

Kewcumber · 10/09/2012 14:42

I have also lived in other countries and not noticed.

OP is your wordly assertion based on an annual holiday because I'm really not convinced its the norm.

How well behaved are your children? In my experience when families with children are ushered ahead of everyone else (in the absence of any visible disability) - its not generally because the queue believes on mass that children should always get taxis first but because the experience of waiting in the queue is much improved without those specific children in it.

sudaname · 10/09/2012 14:42

Yes he is Bitoutofpractice and at weekends and one day during week he has his two DDs with him, one of whom suffers from CF.

With so much point potential combined you could be King and Queen of the taxi ranks. Downside is l would be your mother in law Grin

Kewcumber · 10/09/2012 14:43

Does this remind anyone of the supersoaker thread? Grin

VikingLady · 10/09/2012 14:43

Oh no! This thread and op have induced post-partum mild incontinence! Do I get to skip to the front of the queue? I promise to sit on a plastic bag!

More seriously, I frequently travel alone with DD (6m) as DH works full time. I have blood sugar issues, arthritic hips, a prolapse, lordosis and kyphosis (back problems) and a whole range of problems with my feet. The only part of this visible to a casual glance is DD. I pre-book taxis, factor in time for breaks and generally plan in advance. People frequently offer to let me skip queues or help me with the buggy/bags without me asking. Most people are kind, ime.

LackingNameChangeInspiration · 10/09/2012 14:43

there is no big deal OP, british people DO for the most part help people with a visible need or give up seats for people who need to sit etc

but nobody understands why you think a family standing at a taxi rank needs special treatment in the same way that say a toddler needs to skip the toilet que and you haven't explained that one at all!

MadBusLady · 10/09/2012 14:43

OP, WHY DO YOU THINK YOU NEED EXTRA HELP?

WHY DON'T YOU THINK MEN ARE IN THE SAME POSITION?

missymoomoomee · 10/09/2012 14:43
DreamsTurnToGoldDust · 10/09/2012 14:44

Ive travelled a lot and never come across this. But I cant see how this would work, so woman and babies goes first, then what? Disabled, old? Hidden disabilities? Who trumps who? And bringing up the rear everyone else, who have stood waiting as more people join the queue.

I think your talking bullshit

ArielThePiraticalMermaid · 10/09/2012 14:45

Don'ts say I am not a UK woman. Because I am. Just wondering why it's such a big deal?

It has been explained at length.

YouBrokeMySmoulder · 10/09/2012 14:45

kewcumber Grin

OP I would be spitting chips if you pushed in in front of me, invariably as I was rushing to get to pick my own dc up. Wait your turn like everyone else.

D0oinMeCleanin · 10/09/2012 14:45