to panic that my ex is expecting twins in another country and may try and pay less in child support?

[Fairylea]

Anyone with any experience of similar???

My ex, who is worse than useless on a number of levels (long story) has just announced he is expecting twins in the usa and plans to carry on living between there and here (he has his own business, gets paid a lot of cash in hand). Currently we have a private arrangement whereby he gives me a cheque for a certain amount every month for dd aged 9.

What happens if he decides to try either not to pay or pay less? Would csa chase him out there? Would the twins mean I get less??? I realise the cash in hand probably screws me over anyway as the csa wouldn't realise how much he gets paid but surely the frequent triips back and forward wouldn't add up???

Feeling really anxious at the moment. He refuses to pay by standing order or direct debit before anyone suggests this and I always have to nag him for the money.

With regards to the CSA, he would be paying 15% of his net income for one child. Taking into account the twins, he would have 20% of his net income disregarded and then pay 15% of his remaining net income for DD. So yes, child support does technically reduce for new siblings. You are not unreasonable to have concerns but as it's a private agreement there's no rules as such. Has he actually said he'll reduce the payments?

The CSA may be able to still chase him for maintenance if he resides in a different country but works for a UK based company.

If not, you would have to apply for court for REMO.

Foxy Roxy, it's quite naive to think every subsequent child is planned, by Dad or Mum.

I'm guessing what will matter is where he is officially resident and paying tax. If that's the UK (and if his business is here, then it will be), you should be alright. If its the US (and having kids there won't necessarily give him any residence rights unless he applies for them via his partner), you could be in trouble.

I have been made to believe if you live out of the country a certain amount of months a year, you don't have to pay child maintenance. There is a reduction if he has more children to support too. If you keep it informal, you probably have a better chance of maintaining what you currently get. I'd expect a reduction though.

It's not at all surprising that you might get less for your DD but I totally understand your worry that he might move overseas and stop paying altogether and you'd have no comeback.

I think my main worry would be if the 'private arrangement' between the two of you, the cheque he gives you every month, is more than you'd be entitled to if the CSA had been involved from the beginning - I get the feeling it probably is, otherwise you'd have approached CSA?

If he gets a lot of cash in hand that may be difficult to prove and his basic salary is pretty average, then it all depends on the type of man he is as to how this will turn out for you. His partner in the States may also put pressure, wrongly, on him to cut down on his payments to you. I would like to think he is a decent man who puts the child he already has as just as high on the priority list.

Find a decent solicitor for advice. You need to know where you stand.

So you've had another child with someone else and have less money but expect him to provide the same amount despite having a new family?Double standards much

Oh for gods sake, have you read the same thread as everyone else or do you just want to be nasty? OP has not said this at all.

"I have been made to believe if you live out of the country a certain amount of months a year, you don't have to pay child maintenance."

That isn't true. A member of the forces may live in another country for months on end, maybe years, but they are still employed by a UK company so still have to pay child maintenance.

If you reside in a different country and employed by a non UK based company, there is something called REMO that a resident parent can apply for. It doesn't apply to all countries, but definitely America. It has to be applied for through the court though. The CSA have no jurisdiction.

Does your ex see DD? Surely he is not just going to move to the USA full time without a thought for her.

Op, my sympathies. Not knowing is horrible isn't it, especially when you're having to consider going back to work sooner than you had planned.

I would like to make the general point though that if a parent pays x amount for child maintenance and then has more children it is only fair that that amount is reduced. IF the original payment was the most he (or she) could reasonably afford. Not really aimed at the op - more some of the posters who seem to imply that "original" children should come first. ALL children should be treated equally. The more someone has, the less money there is to be spent on them, whether the parents are together or not.

I don't know much about the usa, but I am sure you can apply through the system abroad and that they work to uk ruling

I think it might be worth you posting on a emigration site, specifically US and asking.

My stepdaughter moved to Australia and her Mum applied through the Australian system but they work through the CSA rules or something and I am sure this must be the case with all westernised countries