Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3

Original poster

AIBU to stop taking neighbours parcels in

53 replies

lola88 · 06/09/2012 15:13

Background is my neighbour has things delivered about 3/4 times a week all sorts from big boxes to small things from next, i always end up taking them in because she's at work which i didn't mind much except that she always comes for them at 9-10 at night knocks loudly until we open the door usually waking DS. So pretty annoying but no big deal really

Now comes the BUT last week i refused to take in a package because i was having an early night and DP was out felt a bit guilty but she'd never know anyway, she comes to the door later asking if i had her package said no didn't know anything about it she huffed and puffed then left, this is an 9.20ish (grr). Then today a guy came asking ifi could take something in first i said yes but he said it was 4 large boxes so said sorry no actually. Reason being my house is tiny and i had my mum, gran, sister niece and DS so didn't want us all climbing over boxes plus tbh getting fed up THEN they guy said that there was a note that numbern 15 (me) is her 'safe place'. I'm just WTF telling a company things can be left here without even asking!

So AIBU to just not take stuff in from now on because it's inconvenient and she's annoyed me using me as her collection service?

OP posts:

Original poster

lola88 · 06/09/2012 15:15

btw i don't have a hall to leave things in so the sit in my livingroom all day, kitchens at the back with no hall either so can't easily put it there

OP posts:

ProudNeathGirl · 06/09/2012 15:17

It depends. Its nice and neighbourly - my neighbours take things for me because I work. If the issue is that she comes to collect them too late at night, can't you ask her to collect them in the morning, or can you leave them by her back door or something? Or perhaps she would give you a key, so you just have to sign for them, but they can be left in her house.

NellyJob · 06/09/2012 15:17

YANBU it sounds really annoying, and did she even consult you?

nancerama · 06/09/2012 15:18

YANBU - cheeky cow nominating your house as a safe place without even asking.

My lovely neighbour used to take things in for me from time to time. After a flurry of packages around Christmas time I felt so bad for inconveniencing her, I sent her flowers.

NellyJob · 06/09/2012 15:19

besides why be 'nice and neighbourly' to someone that really isn't.
I take in parcels for one neighbour on that premise, but she is vile on the whole.

SecretCermonials · 06/09/2012 15:20

YANBU at all she is exploiting the fact that you are home, doing it once in a while is ok but all the time would fuck me off. I personally would have called her on the loud knocking / waking DS issue at the time but that would fuck me off in itself. All in all i think she is taking the piss!

ProudNeathGirl · 06/09/2012 15:21

you might want the favour returned sometime? I just like to get on with people (without being a doormat). I do think the neighbour has been unreasonable, but you have to live next door to her, so is it really worth falling out with her? Think about asking her for key to leave them in her house - sounds like the easiest option.

futureunkown · 06/09/2012 15:23

I can't believe she has been so cheeky to put your address forward without asking you.

It also sounds like there are so many parcels that it is a major inconvenience answering the door nearly every day. Once a week wouldn't be so bad but this is not nice.

I would not be happy about this and would stop receiving the parcels, I just wouldn't answer the door. I wouldn't want the responsibility of a key when I am not friends with someone- it opens you up to accusations if things go missing.

crypes · 06/09/2012 15:26

YANBU My neighbour years ago wouldnt even say hello to me when she passed me in the street and when i took in parcels for her she would look down at her feet and say 'Ta'. So i decided not to do it anymore and then Interflora turned up with a massive bouquet (i was put out they wernt for me) for my neighbour. So i stood my ground and told em nope. Interflora couldnt believe it and looked at me in disgust and they had to go away and come back when she was in (well that was their job).

Ephiny · 06/09/2012 15:37

I have taken in parcels for our neighbour occasionally, and they've done the same for us. It's a nice thing to do as a favour on the odd occasion a parcel comes at an unexpected time or you're not able to be home to wait for it.

However, she should not be nominating you as her 'safe place' without asking, or assuming you'll do it all the time! . That sounds pretty rude and presumptuous.

Toughasoldboots · 06/09/2012 15:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Schnarkle · 06/09/2012 15:45

Cheeky caaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh tell her to find another safe place.

I stopped taking in parcels after a neighbour left 1 in my hall for about a week. It was some sort of plumbing supplies, too heavy for me to carry to his place. Walked to his house, texted reminders for the week. Finally he arrived to take it and had the front to ask me what my problem was with it there. I did laugh and then never did him a favour again. Twat.

maybenow · 06/09/2012 15:51

why can't you just say to her 'this is a bit late, ds is in bed and wakes up when you knock - i'm happy to take your parcels as long as they're not too big but can you please not knock after 9pm? thanks.'

i'm often confused about how much people on mn seem to seethe with each other without actually saying something polite but simple

randomfemale · 06/09/2012 15:53

YANBU - this would really hack me off!

MadBanners · 06/09/2012 15:55

I stopped taking in parcels for the ppl across the rd after they came banging on the door just after midnight, when all the lights were off as we were in bed! This was after many times where I had had to take a parcel over to them as it had been sat in my hall for days!

Bingdweller · 06/09/2012 15:56

This pisses me right off too! We are one of the only families in our cul-de-sac guaranteed to be in during the day at some point. We are like a bloody satellite delivery depot with the various parcels that turn up through the day.

Even the drivers rock up to our door first as they know that there will be nobody else in, but at least have the decency to look sheepish. I wish next door in particular would give up their e-bay addiction - especially when they work away mon-fri!!!

It's a nightmare keeping the DC from poking kicking, knocking over and playing football with the various parcels that turn up.

Ironically when we are out, nobody seems to take in our deliveries and we end up having to re-organise or collect.

YANBU

bobbledunk · 06/09/2012 15:58

yanbu, you've put up with way too much already. You can't have your peace disturbed at bad times and your house constantly cluttered with other peoples stuff. It's fine to be a good neighbour to good neighbours, she doesn't sound like one.

bobbledunk · 06/09/2012 16:00

bingdweller, why on earth do you take them in?....you don't have to be too nice you know...

Nancy66 · 06/09/2012 16:05

I'm with Bingdweller - we became the 'go to' house for deliveries for a while.

We're at No 20 - got to the stage where I was taking in parcels for everyone from houses No2 right up to 68.

No idea who these people are and they often came to collect them late at night.

Don't do it anymore, became too stressful.

amck5700 · 06/09/2012 16:06

My neighbour does take in a lot of stuff for me as I work during school hours. I collect at her convenience though and always the same dy unless that is inconvenient for her and I but her flowers/choccies every so often to say thanks - she also get's all my kids cast offs and I seem to run a DVD lending library too so feel we are probably equal.

I'd definitely mention the coming over too late and that if she is expecting something large could she leave you a key as you haven't the room to store stuff. In the interest of neighbour relations, I'd maybe let the "safe place" issue lay for a while but raise it if there are further issues.

MsNobodyIsOrangeAgain · 06/09/2012 16:06

YANBU.

As a SAHM I'm constantly getting disturbed by Royal Mail etc to take stuff in for my neighbours who I dislike

I recently got notice from the RM that I can opt out of being asked to take in parcels and that my own are also taken back to the sorting office if I am out. I filled the form in online. I was asked the reason for opting out. I put "because I don't like my neighbours".

Unfortunately this does not stop the likes of the Home Delivery Network and other companies knocking on.

Anyway, your neighbour is a cheeky caaaaaaaahhhhh (as someone oop thread said)

WildWorld2004 · 06/09/2012 16:07

Once in a while would be fine but 3/4 times a week is ridiculous.

And knocking after 9pm when u have small children IMO is rude.

I think you have done the right thing not accepting any more.

amck5700 · 06/09/2012 16:09

My friends husband works for Royal Mail and said that there are fewer and fewer people who will take in parcels for others now as generally they don't even know each other.

maytheoddsbeeverinyourfavour · 06/09/2012 16:14

YANBU

I only take in parcels for neighbours we know well and like now, apart from the inconvenience it can actually put you in a vunerable position. My mum took in a parcel for her neighbour which contained a games console, she gave it to the neighbour but they then contacted the company and denied recieving it, mum had no way of proving she didn't still have it and was distraught that it looked to the company like she had stolen it. Fortunately her neighbours werent too bright and accidentally admitted what they'd done to all and sundry but it was a horrible time for my dm and she now won't take anything in

complexnumber · 06/09/2012 16:26

So, do people put down a neighbour's address without even asking them?

When I was living in the UK I used to use my local pub, they were fine with it.

Flip

1 2 3

Swipe left for the next trending thread