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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Would it BU to leave DS alone in the bath briefly?

85 replies

GingerPCatt · 06/09/2012 08:29

I haven't done this I just want opinions

Due to a change at DHs work I'll be alone at night to get DS dinner bath and bed. He's 15 mo and loves having a bath. WIBU to leave him alone for a couple of minutes to tidy the kitchen ect? He's very physically capable and I only fill the bath a few inches. He's my PFB and I'm not sure when people start leaving kids alone in the bath. I don't think he'd like it if I'm still watching him in the bath when he's 15 :-)

OP posts:

crashdollGOLD · 06/09/2012 09:00

It would be very UR to leave a baby in the bath even briefly. I'm suprised you even have to ask tbh.

Birdsgottafly · 06/09/2012 09:01

As said, you are not being over protective, he is still a baby, so only allow age appropriate/developmental independance.

Sometimes even when they are capable of doing something, they go through a pushing boundaries stage, so would ignore not playing with the taps, climbing out of the bath etc.

Is someone telling you that you are PFB? if so, ignore.

You have to make this decision based on a number of factors, but never this young.

picnicbasketcase · 06/09/2012 09:02

No, definitely don't do it, simply not worth the risk. Lol at 45 though

squeakytoy · 06/09/2012 09:03

surely a kitchen can wait till he is in bed to be tidied?

JoandMax · 06/09/2012 09:03

Absolutely too young to be left even for a brief moment.

Mine are 4.1 and 2.6 and I don't leave the bathroom, even if it was just the eldest I don't think I would be comfortable yet.....

HereLittleKitty · 06/09/2012 09:06

I'm sorry but I can't believe you are even considering leaving a 15 month old in the bath to tidy the kitchen??!

Just wait till he is out and safe?!!

My eldest is almost 8 and I left him to have a play in the bath for the first time last week and I must have shouted 'You OK DS?' about 15 times!! I was in the next room!!

Kayano · 06/09/2012 09:07

The fact you would even consider this is

squeakytoy · 06/09/2012 09:09

"My eldest is almost 8 and I left him to have a play in the bath for the first time last week and I must have shouted 'You OK DS?' about 15 times!! I was in the next room!!"

blimey, that really is taking it to the other end of the scale though!!! .. nearly 8????

slartybartfast · 06/09/2012 09:10

but even a 4 -5 year old can turn on hot taps and get burnt

sashh · 06/09/2012 09:10

Bath him in the kitchen sink?

KenLeeeeeee · 06/09/2012 09:10

YANBU for asking for opinions (better to ask if unsure than just go ahead & do it), but as everyone else has said 15 months is too young to be left in the bath. DS1 is 7 & has started insisting on privacy when he baths but I still hover near the door and call out to him every couple of minutes.

squeakytoy · 06/09/2012 09:11

a 4-5 year old is able to understand not to though, I would have said..

Caerlaverock · 06/09/2012 09:11

The ops has decide not to do this so you can all stop with the competitive outrage

WhoKnowsWhereTheTimeGoes · 06/09/2012 09:12

Mine are 6 and 8, I have been leaving them (together) for a couple of years now, but our bathroom is downstairs and you can hear them chattering, if it goes quiet I still go running in to check.

15mo is way too young, they don't have the reflex to push themselves out of the water if they fall in till a good bit older. Could you clean the rest of the bathroom instead if you want to make use of the time?

HereLittleKitty · 06/09/2012 09:13

Yes, I nearly drowned in a swimming pool when I was young so don't like leaving them unsupervised in water.

birdofthenorth · 06/09/2012 09:14

I am alone at bath time 4 or 5 nights a week. DD is 2 and I would never dream of leaving her for a second. There are literally no kitchen activities more important than your child!

Also DD could get out of the bath alone by 18 months. Please don't do it. I thought your pot was going to say because you have newborn twins to care for or similar. To put him at risk because you need to wash up is frankly bonkers, sorry.

seeker · 06/09/2012 09:19

15 months is obviously too young- as the OP agreed seval pages back.

But 8? .

For an NT child that is a bit extreme- to put it mildly!

OHforDUCKScake · 06/09/2012 09:22

No no no no.

YABVU.

HereLittleKitty · 06/09/2012 09:23

Well I have other kids and I bath them together so theres never been any reason for him to be alone in the bath,, theres always been very small kids in with him.

I usually get the oldest ones out first, but last week for some reason he was last so I left him to have a play.

Its just the way its worked out and like I said, I don't like water as I almost drowned when small.

Its never been an issue to me or him so no problem!

TheBigJessie · 06/09/2012 09:42

15 month olds fall over regularly, on land or in shallow water.

I know the OP is not considering this any more, but for anyone else.

When people drown, it happens quietly. You won't hear frantic splashing, or screaming for mummy.

I always stay with mine. Even now, at three, they can slip over, and they can't get up without help. If I hadn't stayed with them each and every time, there's a good chance they could have drowned by now.

Ariadne78 · 06/09/2012 09:45

The child of some people I know tripped in their garden and fell face down into a puddle, with about 2 inches of water in it. Mum was watching from kitchen window where she was washing up. In the couple of minutes it took her to realise he wasn't getting up and for her to run outside and to bottom of garden, he was starved of oxygen and left brain damaged . Absolutely tragic and blighted that family. The parents split up and the child needs round the clock care. Don't leave your infant alone in the bath or near any water, even for a minute.

Original poster

GingerPCatt · 06/09/2012 10:00

Thanks for the responses. I won't leave him alone.
I sometimes find it hard to find the balance between safety and cotton wool. So I ask strangers on the Internet . My folks were very overprotective but my ILs practiced a form of natural selection and just assumed their kids would survive. With 6 gcs under 6 and they still don't have a stair gate.
DH and I argue over what's best for DS and I'll show him this thread if he thinks I'm being too cautious.

OP posts:

BertieBotts · 06/09/2012 10:09

As a rule of thumb, at nearly-4yo I feel okay to briefly go into the kitchen (it's adjoining to the bathroom) and grab a towel or a drink or my phone or something, I get him to sing a song while I'm out of the room so he can hear I'm safe. He doesn't play with the taps or try to stand up, there is non-slip all along the bath and our hot tap starts out cold anyway (even when just used).

Birdsgottafly · 06/09/2012 10:23

my ILs practiced a form of natural selection and just assumed their kids would survive

They have been lucky, i don't understand why parents take this risk, i can only assume it is an ability to be in denial about accidents or lack of awareness.

Everyone ralies round in a tragedy and don't point the finger (rightly so), but there are 'accidents' that should never have happened and it is the child that suffers.

When it comes to burns (which can happen from taps), my attitude changes, as i have had friends who have been through a lifetime of discomfort and not wearing clothes that they want to etc, because their parents didn't think safety measures where needed.

Through my work, i see children disabled by accidents, many of which could have been easily avioded.

Your DS needs your guidance and supervision for at least a few years, yet.

thebeesnees79 · 06/09/2012 10:27

waaayyyy to young. I have only started leaving my lo & he is almost 5 1/2!

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