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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not want to pay for other kids to learn to swim?

284 replies

tomdayleymum · 31/08/2012 12:58

DS about to go into Year 3. Got a letter from school saying that from now til next July Year 3 will be going swimming and please can we have a voluntary contribution of £3.25 per week?

He can swim very well thanks to me paying for him to have private lessons. If other parents haven't bothered (or can't afford) to teach their kids to swim outside of school hours then fine, let the school teach 'em. But I don't want to pay for him to go in school hours when he could do with catching up on his reading instead.

AIBU?

OP posts:
Poodlepower · 31/08/2012 14:14

Just out of interest how many people's children have learnt to swim only or due to these school swimming lessons?

I don't think the OP is being unreasonable to question the point/success of them but you have expressed disdain that your particular child will have to attend which is being unreasonable. Why would you want to set him apart from his peers?

andallthatjargon · 31/08/2012 14:14

My kids (year 1 and year 2) can both swim well (self taught by us) BUT I am still happy to pay for them to swim at school as it is a lovely opportunity and I don't think it's something you can practice too much.

I remember going swimming with the school and it was the highlight of the week, and as my parents didn't take us I still wouldn't be able to swim today if the school hadn't taught us.

NellyJob · 31/08/2012 14:15

I couldn't pay for this 'voluntary' contribution when my kids were in a primary school with a swimming pool on site, the spiteful teacher made sure they were put into the 'non swimmers' group even though we had been swimming together for years.
you have been warned.

Roseformeplease · 31/08/2012 14:21

Why not, instead of blaming the school for trying to teach swimming, and refusing to pay for your (lucky) son, why not get together with some parents and do some fundraising to help pay for the swimming for all pupils? That way you can get together with others, help the school and teach your DS about helping others. The school probably should be able to pay for lessons and transport but, with budgets the way they are, the money will have to come from somewhere and it will cost someone a job, mean fewer books and other vital resources, or be much worse than simply paying a small amount.

Also, you have shown you value swimming as an activity by paying for lessons yourself. What kind of mixed messages are you giving to your son if you "value" it but only on your own terms and not when involving the whole class or school? Surely you want your son, if he is a good swimmer, to have a chance to show his friends how skilled he is? You never know, he (and you) might even learn something.

Hopeforever · 31/08/2012 14:26

Too bored to read the whole thread, sorry

Aged 10 I had completed all the possible levels of swimming at school due to be being part of a swimming club.

I spent the last year of primary in the 'toddler' pool helping unconfident 5 years olds to get used to the water while the rest of my class had their lesson.

I am SO GLAD my parents didn't pull me out of the lessons, it was as helpful to my over all education as an extra lesson in maths

Look at the Big Picture

lemonbonbons · 31/08/2012 14:27

Omg - he is a little boy in junior school - he will love swimming with his friends. Bet it will be his favourite lesson at school.

Get a grip of reality - he has no exams / commitments / anything particular to study for. Why would you not want him to be having fun ?

YABVU pay the money ,if you can t afford it contact school. Please please do not leave him back at school with a yr 2/4 teacher reading in the corner Sad

EggsandBacon · 31/08/2012 14:33

The OP already accepted she was BU and said thanks, you can all stop now!!

RedHelenB · 31/08/2012 14:42

Well done to OP for considering other opinions & reaching a different standpoint. Next problem!!!

TheBigJessie · 31/08/2012 16:14

What alternate reality is this? The OP listened?

servingwench · 31/08/2012 16:27

YANBU! My dd swims well and is about to go into year 3. We already pay £21 a month for her lessons. If I wanted to spend more money on hobbies it would be a different one! I'll be saying thanks but no thanks too!

Mrsjay · 31/08/2012 16:32

all ( i think) school children get swimming lessons in school yabu and it is voluntary don't pay it you are being tight fisted and mean and don't know how schools work,

servingwench · 31/08/2012 16:37

MrsJay...how can you comment on whether someone is tight fisted and mean? Currently my daughter has riding lessons, piano lessons and swimming lessons. This costs me over £100 a month. She can already swim and I do not need her to be taught this at school. I am therefore unwilling to pay for her to go.

Moominsarescary · 31/08/2012 16:46

Depends if your child wants to go swimming with the school or not, if they do it's mean to stop them

gettingeasier · 31/08/2012 16:46

OP Y were BU but glad to see your last post

Novack love your foot stamping about you dont have to pay why hasnt anyone remarked on it etc etc you sound lovely

merrymouse · 31/08/2012 16:51

YABU. The contribution is voluntary, so if you would struggle to pay, you don't have to.

Equally, even if your child can already swim, he will still benefit from lessons that will make him a stronger swimmer. If he is about to go into year 3, he can't be older than 7, so there is plenty still to learn.

merrymouse · 31/08/2012 16:53

Ok, Y were BU

RuleBritannia · 31/08/2012 17:01

Thereis also the element of competition that could be envisaged. Class champion, year champion, school champion, inter school champion, etc. Building up to guess what?

Olympic Champion.

Cmpetition is a challenge so start early to get used to it.

HmmThinkingAboutIt · 31/08/2012 17:17

YABU.

I can't swim I wish I could.

Swimming could save a life.

Interesting, in the US the is a real difference between who dies in drowning incidents. Its disproportionally disadvantaged groups.

FryOneFatManic · 31/08/2012 17:21

Novak as a former school governor who sat on a finance committee, I can assure you that the schools get the bare minimum to cover some of the costs of the swimming lessons but NOT all, especially any buses required. contributions had to be requested or it was a case of not going at all.

In fact, many schools are extremely stretched in their budgets. In our case we had to discuss whether we paid for a coach to get the kids to swimming lessons, or make the kids walk half an hour each way to save costs.

OP I know you've said YABU, I'm sure your DC will get more out of it than you think.

When it was my DS's turn for swimming he decided he didn't want to do it as he already had private lessons. So he stayed behind at school for the first block of lessons, and he complained to me it was boring, he hated being left behind. He didn't get to do anything other than reading, he certainly wasn't learning anything new whhile the others were swimming.

So I let him go (and paid) when the second block rolled around, it's as much about being with classmates as learning to swim. It's a shared experience

babybythesea · 31/08/2012 17:38

Servingwench: MrsJay...how can you comment on whether someone is tight fisted and mean? Currently my daughter has riding lessons, piano lessons and swimming lessons. This costs me over £100 a month. She can already swim and I do not need her to be taught this at school. I am therefore unwilling to pay for her to go.

It might be worth looking at the rest of the thread, wench.
Schools don't choose to take children swimming, it is mandatory as it is part of the National Curriculum. They have no option. (Obviously you have the option to withdraw your child if you feel strongly, which means they will have time to sit in the back of someone else classroom with a book - realistically, that will be about all the school can cater for).
Which means the school has costs associated with it, transport being the main one.
The money has to come from somewhere. Schools already have very tight budgets. Money for transport for swimming has to be allocated at the expense of something else, so somewhere else budgets will be cut. Maybe there'll be no new books in the library, or desks that desperately need replacing won't be.
It is a voluntary contribution precisely because it is an obligatory part of the curriculum, but paying it ensures the school has sufficient funds to meet other needs.
You don't like it - take it up with the government who set the curriculum.

halcyondays · 31/08/2012 17:48

Yabu, and if you can afford private swimming lessons then I'm sure you'll be able to scrape together £3.25.

soverylucky · 31/08/2012 17:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

exoticfruits · 31/08/2012 18:05

I bet nearly all the DCs will be able to swim- they generally can- your DC is having cheap lessons with the school and will most likely not be in the top group.

exoticfruits · 31/08/2012 18:05

I think that you have missed the point of the swimming lessons.

exoticfruits · 31/08/2012 18:06

When I have taken DCs there are generally about 3 non swimmers in a class of 30.

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