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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to not follow new guidelines?

330 replies

LittleSugaPlum · 22/08/2012 18:43

Im pregnant with first baby and im almost 33 weeks.
I plan to bottle feed and have brought all the equipment already.

When i was a nursery nurse, around 5 years ago, it was common to "bulk make bottles" and store them in the fridge for upto 24hours.

When i mentioned to my midwife that i was bottlefeeding, she mentioned that the new guidelines were to make up a feed when needed and its not recommended to "bulk make feeds"

Have people honestly stopped doing this? Do people actually only make one feed at a time?

Im seriously considering bulk making, if it was fine for years, whats the difference now?

AIBU to not follow the new guidelines?

OP posts:
Kayano · 24/08/2012 00:56

There is no good and evil - yet people still seem intent on forcing bf 'advice' and 'help' on a woman who doesn't want or need it Hmm

As if because she has chosen something they wouldn't, she obviously must be ignorant and uninformed.

How that happens with a bf bf bf tra la la NHS I don't know. All I got was bf literature! Stacks of it!

Bellyjaby · 24/08/2012 07:08

OP doesn't want to breastfeed. She's made her choice. You may not agree with it but tough, it's her kid. And yes, the people who are more aggressive are the people saying leave her alone. Probably because we've all been through the "oh my god I can't believe you'd hurt your baby that way" crap like you're swinging it's head repetitively against a wall. If OP wanted a view on her not breastfeeding then yes, fine give it. But she asked for practical advise on bottle feeding. And there's nothing wrong with that, at least she's trying to get informed on bottle feeding. Maybe she shouldn't have posted in this section.

It does makes me wonder if they're also the kind of people who randomly go up to fat people in the street and tell them they should diet. Because you need that normal BMI. Then follow it up with comments like "oh, your family are fat, well it's not your fault if you've only ever seen eating".

naturalbaby · 24/08/2012 07:45

Good or evil?!? That's hardly appropriate when some posters are trying desperately to stop this turning into a bf v ff bunfight.

Pekka · 24/08/2012 08:05

I could almost guarantee that the ladies who advocate BFing most aggressively do not have an under 6 month old baby at home. I EBFd my DS since birth. He refused bottle so I haven't had a full night's sleep in months. I am shattered. Now that DS has started solids, BFing is getting easier. I can see how some people could call it enjoyable. That is because I am not the only source of food anymore, it takes the pressure off me.

OP - In my mum and baby group the FF mums tend to do bulk bottles for night feeds. For the newborn weeks a lot of them used cartons, but that can get quite expensive.

CakeBump · 24/08/2012 08:09

This is so fucking boring and predictable.

Can't you bf's v ff's just give it a rest??

naturalbaby · 24/08/2012 08:15

This isn't a bf v ff thread

CakeBump · 24/08/2012 08:27

No shit Sherlock, so why the argument?

MainlyMaynie · 24/08/2012 08:27

pekka I would have advocated BF when DS was under 6 months (he's 14 months now and still breatsfed). He pretty quickly started to have at least a 5 hour stretch in the night and fed back to sleep when he woke. (We won't talk about the constant daytime feeding to make up for this Grin). Sorry your experience has been so exhausting and glad it's getting better now, but I wouldn't want people trying to make up their mind whether to BF to think it's universal.

bamboostalks · 24/08/2012 08:41

Op...I do not like my boobs being sucked touched in a sexual way either but when I had my babies, that was entirely different and it felt different. I fed with no issues, it really is a totally different sensation.

lurcherlover · 24/08/2012 08:49

I would have advocated breastfeeding when DS was under 6 months too. He didn't feed non-stop and slept for seven hours solid at night from three weeks, then eleven hours from twelve weeks. There are a lot of myths about bf about, and one of them is that all bf babies are poor sleepers. Not true. You just don't know without trying.

I don't get why it has to be so black and white - decide in pregnancy if you will bf or ff. why not just try it and swap if you don't like it?

Bellyjaby · 24/08/2012 08:58

"I don't get why it has to be so black and white - decide in pregnancy if you will bf or ff. why not just try it and swap if you don't like it?"

That was my personal choice but if you are remotely considering the other option you need to prepare and whilst there's tonnes upon tonnes of literature on breast feeding available, there's not on formula. I can assure you that when you plan to bf and only put minimal thought behind a ff back up and events overtake you, it's horrible. The one thing you thought you could control you can't and trying to pick these things up with no sleep and stressed off your head is awful.

I think OP knows its not for her, some people feel very strongly that way and badgering them to try only strengthens their resolve. It's a decision they need to come to themselves.

tethersend · 24/08/2012 09:02

Seriously, who won, the goodies or the baddies?

I think we should be told.

Bonkerz · 24/08/2012 09:03

It's all so confusing. First son in 2000 I bulk made bottles with boiling water, cooled rapidly in sink and put in fridge. 2nd child in 2005 I filled bottle with hot water and added powder when baby needed feeding. Couldn't make feed with hot water as it was enfamil which went solid if warm. Last child in 2011 and I breast fed till day 16 when he was admitted to hospital, they dx cmp intollerence and put him on nutramigen which they made with small bottles of sterilised water which was straight out of cupboard!!! They didn't heat it at all! I basically boiled kettle every morning and made bottle when needed, room temp always.

GreenPetal94 · 24/08/2012 09:06

I made up in bulk 8 years ago. My son never vomited when on formula. I wonder how many babies did have a problem from bottles not from chewing the dogs toys or licking the kitchen floor!

PicklesThePottyMouthedParrot · 24/08/2012 09:15

tethers we reached a compromise and settled on feeding chips

Bellyjaby · 24/08/2012 09:16

I've learnt from this post that the guidelines have changed since I had dd. dd isn't quite 19 months yet! I'm sure guidelines will change again by next week, be it on something pregnancy related, sterilising or feeding.

Bellyjaby · 24/08/2012 09:17

Pickles - I nearly just wee-ed myself at that.

tethersend · 24/08/2012 09:40

Brilliant! Everyone loves chips.

nannyl · 24/08/2012 09:40

what guidelines have changed in the past 19m bellyjelly?

hillyhilly · 24/08/2012 09:45

I breast fed (with occasional bottles) bdid worry about the guideline to use a freshly hot bottle and cool it, it felt v difficult to cool a bottle sufficiently when you have a screaming infant and I worried that I would serve it too hot.

Roseformeplease · 24/08/2012 10:34

IMO if you don't at least try breast feeding, then you are putting yourself before the needs of your child. You are putting your husband's wish to bond (mine is bonded, they love him, he did everything else while I did the feeding) before your baby's needs. You are putting your desire to go out and about before your baby's needs. You are also putting your squeamishness and body consciousness before your baby's needs. Breast feeding needs no preparation, no boiling of bottles, no equipment. When I first asked, way back at the top of the thread, why not try, I meant it as a way of getting you to think that one of the ways round the very real danger of harming your baby with incorrectly prepared bottles is to (No shit Sherlock) do what nature intended for your breasts. They may look nice in a low cut top, or be objects of sexual desire but they are really just brilliantly designed feeding stations which will make your baby (yes, and you) healthier and more content. Yes, babies have survived and thrived on FF. Children survive living on a diet of mostly chips and fizzy drinks too - doesn't make it right. Yes, some mothers have no choice. But, where there is a choice, surely you should be thinking, at least considering, perhaps investigating or wondering about BF.

Bellyjaby · 24/08/2012 10:38

Nannyl - the flask thing comes to mind quickly. Whilst its what I did, I remember health visitors going nuts when I stupidly told them what I was doing. Though maybe guidelines haven't changed, maybe it's just my nutty health visitors, who I tend to avoid like the plague.

Bellyjaby · 24/08/2012 10:45

Roseformeplease - that's your view and you're entitled to it, but op is also entitled to her own. It doesn't mean people should badger op and try to make her feel bad because they have differing views. What's best for baby in your view isn't correct for everyone though may be in the main, it's not a perfect world. And tbh, it was never anyone's business why she's choosing to ff. I think the poor lady is regretting even saying why, not that she ever should have had to.

SirBoobAlot · 24/08/2012 10:47

Roseforme I think that was a fab post, and very brave, take cover Wink

OP I wasn't overally a fan of my nipples being sucked or played with etc, but breastfeeding is entirely different :)

As another poster has said above - please at least consider colostrum, as it is just liquid gold.

And after that, if you are set on bottle feeding, please please do it safely. The babies that have "tummy bugs" when they are tiny have them because of formula not being sterile and not prepared correctly. It can be so so dangerous.

LadyBeagleEyes · 24/08/2012 10:50

I would imagine Rose, after reading your post, and all the other people on this thread that are trying to push BF on the op, have left her running miles in the other direction.
Certainly, if I had already made up my mind, and had to listen to you lot giving advice which I had no interest in, because it's not what I asked, I'd have lost it with you and probably been deleted.
I'm surprised the op is so restrained.