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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to not want Royal Mail to leave my post with neighbours

98 replies

wiggofan · 22/08/2012 15:36

Got a leaflet this morning saying that from late Sept mail too big for the letter box will be left with a neighbour rather than returned to delivery office, unless I opt out of the scheme. I went to the website to opt out and will be sent a sticker to put by the letter box, couldn't find what it'll say - "miserable antisocial git lives here" maybe??
If I'm at home on a week day I'm either off sick or have escaped from noisy office to get on with work in peace, either way I don't want to be disturbed. If I'm expecting a parcel I put a note on the door asking postman to leave in garage. If I get an unexpected parcel would much prefer to collect it from the delivery office which is close by rather than trying to catch neighbour in. The person next door often works nights so I'd hate him to be woken up to take a parcel for me.
I can understand nominating a designated neighbour, with their agreement, but this seems a bit random, not sure what Royal Mail class as a neighbour.

OP posts:
MiniTheMinx · 22/08/2012 18:48

This is a worry to me, I post a lot because of my on line business and I am just waiting for all the emails saying "Where's my parcel?"

It is all very well if the neighbour is trustworthy but some are not and may well deny ever taking it in.

SoDesperate · 22/08/2012 18:49

I totally utterly disapprove! Mail that is addressed to me should be delivered to me!

It is black and white! No gray areas. Otherwise what is the point of sending me mail! Argueablly (sp) it could be sent to my neighbour and passed on to me! No no no!

My neighbours are actually very nice but that is beside the point!

(Feeling a bit sensitive as my mail is already opened by my STB XDH!!!)

yellowraincoat · 22/08/2012 18:56

SDTG forget no 92, I want to know what no 46 did that's so bad BellyJaby has a note up about them!

We have millions of posties and they all leave stuff with neighbours all the time. We live in London, I don't KNOW my neighbours and I don't really want my stuff in their house.

BackforGood · 22/08/2012 18:57

YABU. The vast majority of people would rather pop round next door, or across the road when they get in from work, than have to get to the post office, between certain times, where there is nowhere to park, having gone and collected ID.

For the minority, there is an 'opt out' that you can complete.
As others say though, in all 3 properties that I've owned (and in the parents' homes before that) the regular posties have always done this anyway. It's only when there is someone covering the regular postie that it's ever been a problem.
Oh, and I too work from home quite often, and consider it an advantage to be there for parcels etc, rather than an annoyance.

2ickleducks · 22/08/2012 18:59

Anyone else dying to know about the number 46ers?

catgirl2012 · 22/08/2012 19:01

It's a great idea

I don't have time to trek to the sorting office and stand in a queue every time I miss a delivery.

This is MUCH more sensible.

And all grumpy grinches and / or people who live next door to eejits can opt out

MiniTheMinx · 22/08/2012 19:01

Maybe some people would find it easier to pop over the road or knock next door but that relies on them knowing that a parcel has been left there. My understanding of this is that no card will be left to say where the parcel is.

bobbledunk · 22/08/2012 19:04

I think it would make sense if it were neighbours signing up to accept parcels for each other so those who would benefit from it could.

It will be dreadful for people who live next to untrustworthy neighbours because they will lose all their parcels, unpleasant for those who work from home being constantly disturbed and even worse for shift workers/sick people having their sleep/rest disrupted on a daily basis by the postman.

snuffaluffagus · 22/08/2012 19:06

I don't want my mail delivered to people I don't know.. so I'll opt out.

Also want to know about number 46 though...

twofingerstoGideon · 22/08/2012 19:06

EvilWolef - where to start? She:

(a) makes false allegations to the police*
(b) makes false reports to social services about non-existent child neglect/abuse *
(c) throws dogshit and snails into neighbours' gardens (she's the one with a dog, so it's not other people's!)
(d) intimidates children by hanging around near them and saying things like 'Haven't you got anything better to do with your time?' when they're (for example) building a snowman... Keeps on at them until they give up and go home crying. One 14 year old actually got brave and told her to go away under his breath, she was outraged ("What DID you say, boy? What DID you SAY?") before calling the police, saying he'd threatened her. His parents were mortified.
But when someone new moves in, she's the first person knocking at their door offering 'a brew' and a basket of muffins and trying to find out everything about them so she can use it against them in future

*despite her reputation they still come and 'investigate' - saying they're obliged to.

Snog · 22/08/2012 19:08

I have lots of parcels and I am out every day so a neighbour would get mega pissed off with always taking my parcels and me never taking theirs, surely?

I think this is a shit idea and I don't want a massive sticker on my letter box if i opt out either Sad

Astr0naut · 22/08/2012 19:10

TWofingers, love how mad 92 lady appears to think that throwing snails into someone's garden is equivalent in nastiness to dogshit!

twofingerstoGideon · 22/08/2012 19:10

Catgirl - you don't have to go to sorting office. You can go online and ask for your parcel/registered letter to be delivered on a different day. Works for me!

twofingerstoGideon · 22/08/2012 19:11

Well, Snog, Mrs Hosta-grower at number 90 thinks it is! Grin

nightowlmostly · 22/08/2012 19:15

I'm not really a fan of this idea either, although it happens a lot already I've noticed. I work nights a lot, so miss the post sometimes if I'm asleep and we get quite a lot delivered so I'm concerned about bothering the neighbours really, more than anything. But if you have a great big sticker on your door you're going to look really antisocial aren't you? Which sucks, as the main reason I'd want to opt out is to save them being disturbed on my account.

I would rather just pop down to the post office to get it when it's convenient for me and I know I'm not disturbing anyone at home.

Bellyjaby · 22/08/2012 19:24

I was hoping twofingers 92 was better than my 46!

Ours does the false allegations too, is a serious nut job, her family have threatened to kill mine and another neighbours child and barely a few months go by when someone calls the cops on her. Not that she lets th cops in, which we assume is to do with the weed she constantly smokes. So oddly I don't want my stuff with her as shes been known to lie about neighbours parcels before and if anyone takes in the threats start as the kind person has "damaged" the item.

Thankfully my other neighbours are lovely!

glamourcats · 22/08/2012 19:26

I opted out of this scheme several months and have the sticker on my door....it's really not that big......about 1'' x 2.5'' (but maybe they have made them bigger since then) There's no way I would be happy to leave my post with my crack smocking, drug dealing neighbour (which is the reason I used on the royal mail website Smile )

BackforGood · 22/08/2012 19:26

Seriously, why would you be bothered about taking in a parcel for neighbours ? Confused. It takes 2 mins or less to open the door and take a parcel in, then open the door when they knock later that evening to pick it up. I don't mind, even if I am working from home. I certainly wouldn't mind if it was a day off, and if I'm asleep, I wouldn't hear it anyway.

StuntGirl · 22/08/2012 19:42

My neighbour is a mad old bitch who hates us, for reasons we've never worked out. She does take post in for us if we're not in/don't hear the door but then rolls her eyes/tuts when we go round to collect it. We've never asked her to take it in for us, would be happier if she didn't!

twofingerstoGideon · 22/08/2012 20:27

StuntGirl, do you live at Number 90? Grin

Bellyjaby · 22/08/2012 20:40

Stunt girl, or 48?

DuchessofMalfi · 22/08/2012 21:41

We will want to opt out too. There's no way I'd want parcels being taken in by our neighbour. He's a nasty piece of work who has menaced and threatened us with violence since about two weeks after we moved in. I hate the bastard and go out of my way to avoid any contact with him or his wife. Other neighbours are not much nicer either.

2kidsintow · 22/08/2012 23:20

My next door neighbour is a miserable old git who has become more ignorant and horrible as he got older. Is a shame as he used to be really pleasant, chatty and helpful. We can't pinpoint what happened, but he now cucks his gardening rubbish in our garden, his fag ends in our pond and he aggressively cuts back everything we grow against the boundary WAY over on our side so severely that it dies. Sigh!

I don't want my post left with him.

I'm happy with the arrangement we already unofficially have, whereby if we aren't in, they leave our parcels in the boat on the driveway (covered by CCTV).

Am loving how posh that makes my house sound, when in reality we live in an ex-council house. Grin

Slowcooker123 · 23/08/2012 09:15

2kidsintow. Your postman leave your parcels in your BOAT at th end of your drive? Well our postman either leaves our parcels at the gatekeepers lodge or with the butler. :)

2kidsintow · 23/08/2012 11:01

Very posh, Slow. :)

Our boat, sadly not that posh.

(See photo on my profile of my DD2 doing a 'Titanic' pose when she was v little.)