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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that you don't just give your baby 'hungry baby milk' because your 2 month old won't go more than 4 hours between feeds?

83 replies

BonkeyHasGOLDMollocks · 09/08/2012 20:44

My 'friend' used very very lightly told me that she had her baby on this because he was feeding every 4 hours and she thought he should be going longer.

I FF ds and I am pretty sure it was a 4-5 hour gap until at least 3 months.

Incidently she is planning to wean at 12 week too. Shock

Am I being a super know it all judgy panted bitch? Or do I possibly have a point?

OP posts:
TheQueenOfDiamonds · 09/08/2012 21:53

YANBU

I can never work out why some women are so fucking stupid tbh.

LubileeJubileeJayde · 09/08/2012 21:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

comingoutasasathiest · 09/08/2012 21:53

Good lord, I'm agog at babies who don't feed every few hours, max, bottle or boob.
I know I eat/drink more frequently than 4 hourly.

Original poster
BonkeyHasGOLDMollocks · 09/08/2012 21:54

Wiggle You have a very good point there.
Babies are not designed to go long between feeds. Its just not in their make up surely.

OP posts:
Original poster
BonkeyHasGOLDMollocks · 09/08/2012 21:56

Bugger pressed to soon.....

...but if they have to for whatever reason, then fair enough, its probably better to have a fuller tummy for longer.

OP posts:
Tangointhenight · 09/08/2012 21:58

How long does she want the baby to go between feeds?

Original poster
BonkeyHasGOLDMollocks · 09/08/2012 22:03

She said she would be happy with a six hour gap, would love it if he went from 11-7 at night.

Apparently at the moment he is going 5 hours regularly, but no more which is why she "can't wait to wean" .

Its only a hour more than he was going before.

OP posts:
Tangointhenight · 09/08/2012 22:12

If she wants him to sleep more at night then starving him during the day isn't going to help.

DD was a great sleeper but I ink that was down to the amount of mill she consumed n he day. I honestly don't think hungry Milk will bring the results she wants and weaning him could make him restless at night too.

Hard not to judge OP I know but sometimes there's no point anyway.

Tangointhenight · 09/08/2012 22:13

Again apologies for spelling I'm using my phone

BillComptonstrousers · 09/08/2012 22:21

Mine 3rd DD has been on hungry baby milk since 6 weeks after advice from HV. She is six months next week And still feeds every bloody two hours, and wont take more than 5oz in a bottle, that's just the way she is.

It would be a bloody miracle if she went longer than 3 hours during the day! Surely the norm is every 3-4hours? Who has been telling her every 5-6 hours?

JugsMcGee · 09/08/2012 22:45

I just don't see what the problem is with 2/3 hourly feeds, that's normal isn't it? It's not about judging, I just don't understand what's wrong with feeding on demand instead of trying to make them go longer.

Bigwheel · 10/08/2012 00:00

Uanbu. I know of someone who only fed their baby hungry milk from 3 days old, yes days! I fail to see what is so hard to understand about feeding on demand, surely when we are hungry we eat, even if it's only a snack? Why not the same for a baby?

jens42 · 10/08/2012 00:07

4 hours is a long time for an 8 wk old, my health visitor said to consider how long I would go between food and drinks during day, the night is different though and my child slept terribly so I'm in no position to judge!

TheQueenOfDiamonds · 10/08/2012 02:07

To be honest, she sounds like a moron. I feel sorry for her child. I don't understand why so many women have babies, and then don't want to feed them properly.

Hungry baby milk doesn't bother me completely. My daughter had it from about 8 weeks - Not to make her sleep, she slept well from the start - but because it was the only formula milk that she didn't throw back up.

As for early weaning. Again, what is hard to understand about the tongue thrust reflex? Or playing russian roulette with your childs fucking bowels?! It doesn't even make them sleep better, and its certainly no good for weight gain. Milk is, because it has more calories. Unless your baby has a condition that means they are not able to get the calories and nutrients from the milk, this excuse for weaning them doesn't even make sense.

TheQueenOfDiamonds · 10/08/2012 02:09

And why does she need him to go 6 hours? Surely she is looking after him all day anyway? Why the need to not feed him?

cranverry · 10/08/2012 03:18

I think YABU about the hungry baby milk but you've conceded that already. She is definitely BU wanting her tiny baby to go so long between feeds. I know some naturally do it, my nephew took a lot of milk in one go then would happily wait 5-6 hours for his next one. Most babies need to be fed more often though and if the baby is crying for it then it's cruel not to give milk. Maybe you could ask your friend how long she goes between food and drink. Bet it's not 6 hours.

AmberLeaf · 10/08/2012 09:16

I think people in general should concern themselves much less about what other people do.

YABU.

CherryBlossom27 · 10/08/2012 09:39

Tango that's interesting actually as I got to the stage of giving my DS 240mls every 2-3 hours at 4 months old and it was just draining through him and not helping his hunger at all. Horrible experience! On the advice of my gp I started weaning at 17/18 weeks and it's amazing that a couple of spoons of purée helped his hunger where the milk didn't. I knew straight away that I had done the right thing as DS was so much happier. I actually felt terribly guilty that he had been screaming with hunger for weeks on just milk.

I think until someone has a very hungry baby they don't know what it's like. I really do thnk it depends on the individual baby as two friends started weaning their babies at 6 months and their babies seriously weren't interested in food at all, whereas at the same age, DS is eating three solid meals a day and can't get enough.

I wouldn't wean at 12 weeks personally, but I don't think I would comment in real life to someone doing it, other than say to someone to aim for 6 months, but see how it goes. Anecdotal I know, but myself and my brother were weaned at 14 weeks and we are both fine.

ceegeebee · 10/08/2012 10:14

I agree with Amberleaf.

This is the second thread i've read on AIBU today that is criticising other mother's parenting choices who are supposedly friends (the other one about using the nursery in hospital which I could not be arsed to respond to).

It's noone elses business.

Tangointhenight · 10/08/2012 10:16

cherry DD was the same, nothing satisfied her until the day I gave her porridge, I wanted to wait until she was 6 months but the HV told me that 6 months is the recommended age for the average baby, DD was never average, so it made sense that filling her with so much milk couldn't be good for her.

She was on 3 meals by 6 months too and eats anything I give her.

coraltoes · 10/08/2012 10:30

I'd reassure her that 4 hours between feeds is pretty normal! even gina ford goes by that sort of schedule...and i'm sure the packets of milk do too?

coraltoes · 10/08/2012 10:31

infact even now as a toddler DD wont go more than a couple of hours between consuming something, whether it is milk, to breakfast, to snack, to lunch, to snack, to tea, to milk or whatever!! Little tummies need little and often.

iggi777 · 10/08/2012 10:38

I was weaned (the farleys-in-the-formula-bottle approach) at 4 weeks. This leads to my mum saying that it never did me any harm - overlooking my weight and miriad of allergies!
Of course it's easy to be critical of the parenting choices of others, but it's not like choosing between brands of chocolate - some choices are bad ones.

BertieBotts · 10/08/2012 10:48

Six hours? Shock I can understand wanting that at night but in the day...? Confused You wouldn't expect a toddler to go nearly that long without food. Madness.

Wowserz129 · 10/08/2012 10:54

It drives me insane when people say weaning was recommended at 3 months when I had my children. Well it's not anymore because we have more knowledge since then! Doctors used to encourage smoking at one point but we all accept that as years go on research increases and we become more aware of the effects of these things.

Yes I am sure the baby will not blow up but I think it is selfish to wean a baby early because you think your baby is not sleeping enough! What do people expect when they have children!