to make DS replace my bone china mugs

[VicarGoingForGoldInKungFu]

i hate this, i hate feeling like this but i cannot wait until DS goes to uni in Sept......he is draining every last ounce of strength i have.

He is 20, he has SN,

i have some bone china mugs that i lovingly chose on holiday, DS has thrown them away rather than wash them up.

he takes mugs to his room despite repeated requests not to do so because they stay there until they are growing things
then he chucks them away rather than wash them.

now 4 out of my 6 bone china mugs are missing.
i know its trivial but its just another nail in the coffin for our relationship and i hate myself for thinking this but i cant wait for him to leave home.
i need a break from him so badly or i will end up doing him a damage.

i have asked him to replace the china mugs.

Think dragon hoard to be crooned over and stroked. That sort of thing.
My Precioussssss

Hi all. Without meaning to be a pain, can I just say jobs & house shares are not easy to come by when your aspie DS (now graduated with a good degree) decides that that job doesn'texactly fit his CV, and there's no reason for him to leave. He's quite comfy thanks, living in that bedroom conversing with virtual pals. I will add he's absolutely gorgeous, a son to be so proud of considering the bullying etc that he lived through because he was different, but I am terrified about his future as I have run out of ideas of how to help him...

DS may be easier to deal with if he had something that he held precioussssssssss and i could wield it to my advantage.

sadly not. nothing is sacred.

im back. im on the

he has promised faithfully to get up early and search the net for my mugs.
i will believe it when i see it.

i have tried to explain that it will be one instance like this that sees me go wibble and attack him with, oh dunno, bone china tea cups maybe? and that he will be mystified. scratch his head and wonder if he should have me committed......

he swears he will get up in the morning and find me some mugs. ive said its these little things are making my relationship with him feel very (very very) strained.....
it will be interesting to see if he responds.

now time for more

Passes out several s.

You are a copper Vic, you know the recovery position.
I use it to roll mine out of bed on days when he's supposed to be up and doing stuff, but had a late night and less that 8 hours sleep.
He tends to make a wuffling noise and then yell 'I'm up!' just as he hits the floor.

Do that, and yell 'Morning! Time to look for mugs!'

wheresmylifegone
i feel that i may be where you are in a year.
if he gets to uni.....i am putting him between a rock and a hard place as i feel i will be unable to support him with grace if he stays here......uni is a half way house, and yet, i suspect he will be back after uni.

not sure whether the break will be a good thing or a shock to the system on his return....

i said to him tonight he takes advantage of the fact he knows i will always be there for him.
he knows thats true.

pets - take heart - its not always tough, and like fallen correctly points out - they are all different and we all have our blips - even with NT kids.

on the whole, i am actually proud of him.
he has done some very dodgy things, but i have learned that my emotional responses mean nothing much as when he has done something which i see as behaving badly, he has viewed it differently and does not actually do anything with malice or the intention to hurt.....the fact that he sometimes has, has come as a shock to him i think. When he has had a problem he has solved it.
im sure that he thought i would yawp at him for mouldy cups.
which i would have.
so he got rid of them.
he now knows that im cross about that and that those china cups meant something to me.
he does not set the same store by material things as i do.
he has no precious things, so he cant relate to me having mine.

not making excuses for him mind......he is going to feel this one in the wallet.

'he does not set the same store by material things as i do.
he has no precious things, so he cant relate to me having mine.'

Whereas mine hoards things that are precious to him in a room full of containers and boxes and crates. It looks like the storeroom of an odd branch of a museum, or the tomb of an impoverished pharaoh who wanted to take everything with him, and the walls are covered in sketches and symbols and random images.
So if I was ever truly wrathful, I could destroy his world with a dozen charity bags.
I don't think he's recover though.

Hmmm is internet access is precioouuuuuuuuuuuus

i sometimes wish i had something to wield.....but its probably a good thing i dont being a vengeful moo

internet access is so precioussssss that he has managed to bypass mine anyway!

he is a doing a computer science degree.....its pointless trying to outwit him on the internet front.

sadly.

Bits of a computer will fit in a charity bag.
The modem for example.
Or all the cables.
A hammer works too.

GTG, message me if you need a scream Vic.

ok thanks fallen

ive done that before. i once chucked his laptop out of the bedroom window
it was just expensive.
but worth it

I'm glad he's off to uni. Hope you get a good break and time to chill. Do make him buy more cups tho. Even a non-aspie teen needs reminding about the importance of looking after other people's things
My aspie bro moved back inwith my parents after uni - please don't let that happen, I wouldn't recommend it

i wish i knew the date he was going......

i am hoping that he will get a job pretty soon after uni, or, he is talking about doing a masters.....

i do need some space from him. maybe a year at uni will help him become slightly more considerate of others

and he is going to get me more mugs, hell hath no fury like a vicar without china mugs.....