to be very disappointed with my brother and sister's reaction to DV in the street

[terter]

I went out for lunch with my brother and sister this lunchtime, we were sat outside and midway through it, a man was dragging his girlfriend/partner/wife through the street by her hair whilst shouting abuse at her. I saw it and said we should go over and help her but my brother said "no chance look at the size of him" and my sister agreed with him saying that you'd have to me mad to go and talk to him. I then said we should at least call the police and my brother disagreed saying that it's best no to interfere in other people's lives and my sister then chirped that we don't know the backstory and we don't know what she'd done .

I'm really disappointed and annoyed with them both I quickly finished up and settled the bill and they wanted to go on to another bar for a drink but I went home instead as I'm fuming with them. AIBU?

I once called the police on a "domestic" outside my house.
They didn't come out :(

Yabu, dh has stepped into this situation and got a way with no injuries. Dbro was set about by the bloke and then the woman, he was trying to help. Luckily 2 policemen saw it and ran to help. However dbro was very badly injured.
You want to go over, you do. Doesn't mean everyone should.
don't really get why you asked them to call, why didn't you just do? But yes the 'you don't know what happened' excuse is disgusting. Whether the man was beating a woman, child or another man.
Would you have felt the same if he was doing it to another man?

Ex was off duty and jumped in to stop something similar. The stupid bitch scratched hell out if his face. Both the couple ended up arrested.

also hat did they say when you challenged this view? I am assuming you did.

YABU I saw two men fighting in the street on Saturday night, I neither intervened nor called the police

My uncle intervened in street dv situation and got beaten to the floor and kicked unconscious. He was an off-duty policeman, trained in escorting resistant 'clients' to court.

I think if there are enough of you, you potentially could intervene, I've seen a group of burly-looking men intervene and eventually sit on a man who was slapping and punching the woman he was with - he was absolutely raging, like he was on some kind of drug - and he was hauled off in a van.

I broke up a fighting couple. The man hitting the woman.

The WOMAN stabbed me.

If I saw a fight again I would just ring the police.

If you wanted to intervene so much, why didn't you do it on your own? There was nothing stopping you from making the decision to help for yourself, you didn't have to do what your brother and sister said.

I can understand people not wanting to get involved, I'm really not sure I would but why the reluctance to call the police?

Dprince- I did challenge them but they just carried on the "you don't know anything about either of them so best keep out" line of argument.

I assuming people are reluctant to call the police in case it goes to court and they are asked to testify. Only reason I can think of.

Actually its not the only reason I can think of. Some people just don't want to get involved in 'domestics'. I don't get it myself.

Very shocked to read so many stories of women attacking people who were trying to help them. No idea what I would have done tbh, but I am truly crap at thinking on my feet.

YABU your siblings sound like vile people who couldn't give a monkeys about anyone but themselves

Sorry that should be YANBU , I'm having a slow day

But whilst public dc is shocking, how much goes unseen behind closed doors?

Last weekend my father, who's in his mid 70s, was saying to me have you seen the figures released for dv this year? He was that afternoon taking a young woman he knows through his local pub to Gatwick to fly home to her parents after being attacked by her partner, who after being charged, buggered off for a lads holiday.

Sorry, public dv

YANBU if it were my brother I'd grab him by the hair and drag him down the street and then see if he still thinks that " you shouldn't interfere in other people's lives". Your sister's views are equally odius.

I'd do the same, since the last time dp and I intervened in similar the pair of them rounded on us, hitting and kicking at us and the woman said she was going to stab us both. So excuse me if I don't get involved.

I am shocked that when you pointed out that it was assault, they still shrugged it off. After the event, what was their reasoning for not treating as an assault?

This is a whole other thread, but I'm on my iPhone and don't know how to start one.
Is it any surprise that sympathy for victims of DV is low when the woman turning on helpers happens so many times. People who genuinely deserve sympathy lose out.

So what did the police say terter?

I tried to intervene once and was met with a volley of abuse from the woman trying to help, if I'd seen what you did I'd have just carried on with lunch tbh.

I would never intervene or involve myself in DV after witnessing a man getting stabbed and attacked once whilst trying to help. He nearly died, and needed, iirc, 56 (or around that) stitches in his head. And the woman kicked him in the head, too. It is happening far too often and it just isn't safe to help in these circumstances anymore. You never know what weapons they could be carrying.

I would, however, as I did when the above happened, ring the police straight away and express how bad the situation is and how they need to get there asap before someone is seriously injured or killed.

How anyone, male or female, can treat another human being like that is beyond me. It is sickening.