Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To TTC after being offered a proposition at work..?

39 replies

Haylebop12 · 26/07/2012 17:43

I've recently started (first day today) a 2nd part time job in a supermarket to supplement our income. As the store I'll be working in isn't set up yet I'm training in a store really close to home.
Anyways, the manager at my new store has called me in for a meeting and offered me a team leader position at the store I'm training in. This is 12 weeks training then 24 hour contract. Which is fine.
However, I had an mc in June and do at the moment dh and I are actively TTC. I get really sick during pregnancy for around 3 weeks and during last pregnancy was hospitalised.
AIBU to accept it knowing I'll hopefully be pregnant within 3 months then probably will be off sick at some point and then going on mat leave?

OP posts:
Angelico · 26/07/2012 17:47

Erm... I think you mean promotion which gives your thread a rather different slant... :o

Original poster
Haylebop12 · 26/07/2012 17:50

Well at the moment it's just a proposition because I haven't given an answer....

OP posts:
DottyFlowers · 26/07/2012 17:51

YANBU, go for the job, there's no guarantee how quickly you'll get pregnant. Go for it and the baby will come when it's meant to :)

LindyHemming · 26/07/2012 17:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Haylebop12 · 26/07/2012 17:53

I like your thinking dotty
I haven't struggled to get Pg before but unsure how my cycle is after mc?

OP posts:
poppy283 · 26/07/2012 17:54

Yanbu. Go for it, both TTC and the promotion!

WorraLiberty · 26/07/2012 17:54

Go for it

No two pregnancies are necessarily the same anyway so there's no guarantee you'll even feel slightly sick.

Original poster
Haylebop12 · 26/07/2012 17:56

100% of my pregnancies have resulted in severe hyperemesis :-/

OP posts:
Original poster
Haylebop12 · 26/07/2012 17:59

Euphemia, he does look bit pervy but if I took promotion he wouldn't be my manager!!

OP posts:
LunaticFringe · 26/07/2012 18:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Haylebop12 · 26/07/2012 18:15

That's good lunatic. I'm mainly worried because I've only just started with this company and been offered this. I've worked in food retail before (16-18yo) but only just started here. They know I have 1 dd and the fact im with dh and 24 yo they could put 2+2 together??

OP posts:
Sallyingforth · 26/07/2012 18:29

Personally I think it's unfair to an employer to start a job knowing you're likely to want maternity leave very soon. And it does make employers reluctant to recruit young women. However it's quite legal and many people do it, so if you want the job, take it.

Original poster
Haylebop12 · 26/07/2012 18:33

Well I'm not pregnant, yet. Could be 3 months and would work until 34 weeks ish depending on all being well as with pg1. So technically would not be leaving for 11 months...and would return as I see this as a good opportunity.
I feel dishonest but I'm aware it's not really their business if I'm
TTC?
Kinda don't wanna piss em off!

OP posts:
rainuntilseptember · 26/07/2012 18:35

What if you turn it down and a baby doesn't come? (Obviously hope that's not the case). Women can't live their lives as if they could be pregnant at any time.

BartletForAmerica · 26/07/2012 18:37

Women of childbearing age can't NOT take jobs, sallyingforth. Sadly, as many of us know from difficult personal experience, there is no guarantee of getting or staying pregnant when one wants to. I think you should make the best decision for right now, hayle, with an eye to your hoped for future, which probably means accepting this promotion. I think employers realise that young women are likely to be pregnant at some point.

Original poster
Haylebop12 · 26/07/2012 18:38

That's true, I like the way this thread has turned out!!

OP posts:
MarysBeard · 26/07/2012 18:39

A child is for life, a job isn't.

Original poster
Haylebop12 · 26/07/2012 18:40

Thanks guys, feeling better :-) and less stressed :-)
I have a meeting with my new manager if I take it tomorrow as I've not met him yet. Will try and work him out lol!

OP posts:
Minshu · 26/07/2012 18:47

I hope yanbu as I'm doing something similar at the moment :). But I've been ttc for 18 months with no success so far. Hope you get pg quicker than that...

Original poster
Haylebop12 · 26/07/2012 18:54

Oh minshu, this pregnancy stuff sucks sometimes. I got pg end of march first cycle after depo injection and mc in June. Got a dd 3.5 so really want to get on with it.

OP posts:
thebody · 26/07/2012 18:55

Go for it and best of luck.

Minshu · 26/07/2012 18:59

My dd took 10 cycles, and is getting on for 3 now. At least I have her, but it seems just about everyone I met when she was tiny has had their second by now. And I'm getting old... 14 years older than you :(

RossettiConfetti · 26/07/2012 19:01

Take the job. As others say, what if you don't get pregnant for a long time? Hopefully you will though and then you can demonstrate your loyalty to the company for giving you this opportunity by returning to work after maternity leave and continuing to be a valued employee.

mirry2 · 26/07/2012 19:04

Take the job. you may be unlucky in ttc or it may take ages.

Casmama · 26/07/2012 19:04

I think I would wait about a month and then ttc so that even if you get pg straight away you will hopefully get through the training before any sickness starts.