to think this is selfish

[grantham84]

Know its petty but twice in the last couple of weeks I have been sat on a bench waiting to meet a friend. I am 30 weeks pregnant and it shows. Two OAP'S have come and sat right next to me on the bench and lit up cigarettes. Each time I got up and moved. Not the end of the world I suppose as other seats available although not so easy for me to see my friend arriving from those seats. Plus why couldn't they use a different bench?

I would imagine that they weren't looking at you and thinking you were pregnant. They were looking at the bench and thinking 'I want to sit, I'm going to sit.'

Very petty. You're breathing in worse every day just walking down the street.

Not petty at all, that would really irritate me too! Its very inconsiderate to light up next to a non smoker, pregnant or not.

YANBU. Why did they not use the other benches?

Well on account of you not owning the outdoors yabu.

pictish has a point, although you would think that common courtesy would dictate you dont smoke next to a pregnant lady, however when they were having children, smoking wasn't such a big deal, so they probably don't realise.

The "smoking kills" message has yet to reach some people.

Also, some old people have an entitled attitude.

YANBU at all. I would have moved but I wouldnt have been happy about it.

If there are other benches free then the polite thing would be to go and sit on another bench not light up next to someone else.

I think it's bad form to sit right beside anyone (pregnant or not) and light up (and I'm a smoker)

Not much you can do about it though,I don't even think it's a generational thing,it's just smokers putting their need for a fag before others need for fresh air.(and before I get flamed for that,I repeat...I smoke myself!)

Yanbu just another example of how ignorant smokers are.

I think it shows how much smoking etiquette has changed, but I'd be irritated too.

YANBU. I am a smoker, but I would not light up if I was sat next to a stranger who was not smoking, pregnant or not.

If I was was already sat there smoking and they chose to come and sit there then that would be different.

Samantha are you being serious you would actually ask a pregnant lady if she minded do you live in a bubble? Of course she would mind, as I said smokers are completely ignorant.

Bit of a generalisation there fourlots

Fourlots as can be seen on this thread alone that simply isn't the case.

I know lots of pregnant women who wouldnt mind. My mate is one of them, as she stopped smoking when she found out she was pregnant, but would enjoy the occasional whiff of them when we stood outside smoking, so she by choice came and stood with us.

Fourlotsoftrouble

Do you really mean all? Generalising much?

OP, you are being petty. I suggest you stay in for the next 10 weeks as you are definitely at more risk from car fumes than exposure to the wafts of smoke from these ladies ciggies once a week.

'Hmm, tough one'?!

I'm being dense, but what exactly's 'tough' about it?

Gotta love smokers. Said as an ex one myself.

ha ha that was what i did squeaky went and stood with smoking friends whilst not smoking cos i was pregnant!

i wouldnt sit down on a bench with someone and light up, but if i am sat on a bench and smoking and they come and sit next to me then that is there choice. i had this the other week tho, sat smoking out of the way of people and someone came and stood next to me and then actually told me to stop smoking as she didnt like it, i just gave her a look! she CHOSE to come and stand next to me, there was plent of other space around etc, why choose to stand next to someone smoking and then moan about it!

i wouldnt smoke next to someone pregnant. or a child. everyone else is fair game though

yanbu. I have the same issue, I am only 20 weeks pregnant so my bump is fairly new, when people smoke next to me I say to them "sorry to bother you but i'm pregnant. I'm sufferering from smell induced sickness and it is likely that I will vomit on your shoes if you continue to smoke near you, just thought i'd give you a heads up" they move fairly fast!

Surely basic manners say if you are a smoker you don't stand next to someone who isn't smoking and light up (or ask them first if they mind), if your a non smoker who doesn't like smoking you don't stand next to someone who is smoking.

Because your baby is precious to you, not to them. They are outdoors in one of the few places they can still sit down and light up, why should they care about you? You are quite capable of moving away. They aren't selfish, just equally entitled to sit on that bench. You not liking it isn't their issue. Unless one of them is your nan in which case, tell her off. Strangers are obliged to give a fuck though.

aren't obliged arghhhhhhhhhh