to get cross when dh expects me to heat up his tea?

[PiedWagtail]

Last night I ate with the kids - risotto, so easy for dh to heat up later. At 9 ish I was relaxing on couch with wine and cripss just having finished work when dh came in (he was working too; we both have home offices) and asked about tea. I said, I ate earlier. Cue grumpy look; 'oh, I'll be doing my own then?'. Grrrrr. It took him 2 mins to reheat the risotto, it's not like I was asking him to catch the chicken, pluck it, cook it..... etc!! Drives me mad. Plus, he has only cooked about twice in the last 6 months. Gah. IABU??

What's wrong with reheated risotto Chaos??

I always try to ensure that one adult eats with DS. When DH and I are both at work then DS eats with his (grown up) cousins at the table and I leave food in the fridge for them to reheat and eat together. Then DH and I eat at the table together when we come in from work. If DH is working late then DS and I eat together and vice versa.

It's not the perfect 'everyone around the table' family meal, but it's as close as I can manage, and I think it's important. DH doesn't need anyone to model good table manners and eating a wide range of foods. DH and I eat a meal just the two of us after DS is in bed once a week or so, and that is lovely and I do my best to make sure it happens - but not every day at the expense of DS eating with an adult.

Did you mean that to me pictish?

Nothing, I was joking. People always bang on about never reheating risotto as it goes all gloopy

This happens here as well. I eat with ds so he's not eating on his own. Then I make dh's tea when he comes in- he invariably makes some sort of crack if I ask him to heat it up himself. He complained last night because his dinner had been plated and put in the oven to keep warm as he had left work late (without telling me). I reminded him the last time he did that I put the dinner in the bin- so he apologised.

Sorry yes I meant you Valium! I seeeeee....piss takery is it? fair enough.

I always save a portion of risotto for my lunch the next day, and it has never gone gloopy.

Oh Lord yes, definitely piss takery, dh should heat up his own dinner!

Oh, I am making risotto tonight, I will save a bit and reheat tomorrow

DH works shifts dinner is usually at 6 if he isnt home he heats it up himself he isnt handless he is a grown up.

saying all that I can remember my mum putting a fresh dinner on for my stepdad if he was on lates peeling potatoes at 9pm

I thought you couldn't reheat cooked rice?

You can as long as it has been cooled quickly and put in the fridge. It's the hanging around that is dodgy.

Snatch - yes, you can, cos I just at the last of the cursed risotto for lunch today

Mrsjay - that's why I'm glad I'm not a 70s housewife!!!

Aha, thanks!

OP, YANBU.

hat's why I'm glad I'm not a 70s housewife!!!

THANK THE LORD FOR MICROWAVES [GRIN]

Oh yes - and dishwashers!!! And tumble dryers!

OP YANBU and this has been a useful thread for me. In our house:

DC and I eat dinner about 6.30.

H is out with friends every. Single. Night. Until 11pm.

I have frozen leftovers for DCs lunch, or not left him fish fingers peas and mash out.

He huffs and puffs wondering why I have not prepared him a meal for when he gets back a 11, and whynI won't get out of bed to eat with him at 11.15pm when I have to work at 6am.

He thinks I am being U and failing in my wifely duties as a woman.

I think, fuck off, this isn't a fucking restaurant. Despite what your mother thinks you are perfectly capable of getting yourself something to eat. If you want to be anti social in your habits, don't expect me to enable it.

Honestly I think this is such a minor thing to complain about. He just had a little grump. I have them all the time!

Although Sunshine you need to tell him to pee off....big time!

sorry bringmesunshine your husband sounds an arse

No need to apologise Mrsjay, it isn't libel if it's true :)

Kissmyhoop, his day is coming, though I can say no more as this is my regular name. ;)

what is the thing about heating up rice I heat it up all the time are you not supposed to I do put it in the fridge though

Sorry, Bringmesunshine :(

If my DH said that to me I'd say 'what's your problem?' and he'd apologise for being grumpy.
If grumpy comments about reheating dinner himself became a regular thing, I'd think we needed a conversation about how he felt about regularly missing dinner with me (and DC in your case) and whether he felt that me working from home and him going out to work most days made him feel like he had the poor end of the deal IYSWIM.
But sounds to me like he'd just had a stressful day at work. That's not your fault. YANBU.