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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To let DS take the day off school on Monday?

77 replies

Tracheostomy · 14/07/2012 17:07

DS is 13 and has spent the past week in Berlin on a school trip. Lots of walking, sightseeing, partying, messing around at night time (I'm guessing, boys dorms!) and a veeeeerrrry long DRIVE home. He's had hardly any sleep since last Sunday.
He arrived back at school today and because of my work, he had to be picked up by his dad and spend another night away from his own bed - again his sleep will be minimum.

Last week at school - they won't be doing much - I feel sorry for him - I've told him to take Monday off school and go back Tuesday. I'm sure many people would "pull a sickie" at work under similar circumstances?

AIBU?

OP posts:

CarefullyAirbrushedPotato · 14/07/2012 23:07

your primary concern is your child, it doesn't matter about other people and what they think.
if you think he's too knackered keep him off. stuff the teachers, seriously.

Ohyoubadbadkitten · 14/07/2012 23:11

Nothing wrong with having to go in while being tired! Tis just life.

babybythesea · 14/07/2012 23:18

That's a really nice attitude Carefully. How beautifully worded. Yup, stuff the people who are responsible for educating your children. What business is it of theirs if you don't want him in school that day because he's tired? And if he gets the message that school isn't that important and misses other days for other important reasons, stuff them then too. And if he doesn't progress all that well, then stuff .... no, hang on. It's their job to make sure he progresses so they better damn well do it, right?
It's only a day, anyway. Until the next time, at least.
Actually, I think the poster who pointed out that the school is likely to say that if the trip affects kids so badly they can't turn up in school afterwards, they won't run it again, has a really important point. The school's job is to have all the kids there, learning; trips are optional. If they consistently had kids who didn't turn up because they were recovering from a trip the sensible thing to do would be to stop the trips in future.

ilovesooty · 14/07/2012 23:19

your primary concern is your child, it doesn't matter about other people and what they think.if you think he's too knackered keep him off. stuff the teachers, seriously

Nice - given that those teachers you speak of so dismissively will have been looking after pupils 24/7 for a week and will be turning up to teach on Monday.

BackforGood · 14/07/2012 23:19

Yes, YABU - what kind of message does that give him ?
He's got all today, tonight, tomorrow, and tomorrow night to "recover" (as if a 13 yr old needs to) and if he's still tired on Monday, you can suggest a 7pm bedtime so he gets 12 hours on Monday night as well. Tuesday too if he's that tired. Presumably he breaks up on Friday anyway, so will have 6 weeks when he can lie in ?
I'm not sure who you mix with, but I would never "pull a sickie" and I don't know that I@ve ever worked with anyone who would either.

Mamamaiasaura · 14/07/2012 23:20

Of primary concern is child (as it should be) send him to school!

olympickibucket · 14/07/2012 23:21

OP has run away and hidden...

LadyBeagleEyes · 14/07/2012 23:31

Oh give him the day off.
I gave my ds days off in those circumstances, in my mind schooldays are the only time where there is someone else to make the decision for them, and that is what I've always told ds.
When they get out into the big bad world which will last from 18 till they retire, then that is when they have to take responsibility, schooldays are so short.
My ds is dux of the school (Scottish thing) and will be going into his 6th year sitting Advanced Highers, but has missed days.
The pressure starts so soon for them, what difference does one day at the end of term make.

RichTeas · 14/07/2012 23:35

School on Monday. He's had the whole weekend to recover from his holiday.

Xmasbaby11 · 14/07/2012 23:35

That's plenty of time to recover. Send him in! He shouldn't need days to recover from a holiday if he's a healthy boy. I think you're sending a bad message if he gets a day off after a holiday.

Why doesn't he sleep well at his dad's?

igggi · 15/07/2012 11:29

The school may be expecting students who've benefitted from the trip to talk to others about their experience (especially if they visited holocaust related sites). There is a reason they held the trip in the second-last week rather than the last week of term.

whatthewhatthebleep · 15/07/2012 11:57

and have you thought to actually thank these brilliant teachers who have tirlessly worked their butts off to make this trip away possible for your DS....he should be turning up on monday with lovely thank you cards for them all!!!

it's called responsibility and parents are supposed to teach their kids this basic behaviour....

to school...no excuses !!

Dominodonkey · 15/07/2012 12:47

YAB entirely unreasonable.

Just to concur with what someone else said about cancelling the trip next year I have suggested the exact same thing at my school after lots of students were absent the day after a trip to France.

If they can't cope with a trip and school then the trip must go!

igggi · 15/07/2012 13:23

Presumably he will also have work to catch up on from the week he missed, or do we discount the last two weeks of term now?

HeadfirstForRomance · 15/07/2012 14:50

YABU he's a teenager not a toddler, he will survive without having a lie in on Monday

He's also old enough to be responsible enough to get some sleep at his dads, if he doesn't then tough shit tbh.

How about an early night tonight? No excuse for throwing a sickie tomorrow and it is setting a terrible example.

knowitallstrikesagain · 15/07/2012 14:57

He has been having fun for a week. And because of this he deserves a day off school...

I have never pulled a sickie just because I stayed up late the week before. But it seems that this is the example you are going to set him so go ahead.

LucieMay · 15/07/2012 14:58

Let him have an afternoon nap today if need be, early night, he'll be right as rain in the morning.

mumeeee · 15/07/2012 16:58

YABU send him in. The teachers and other children are probably also very tired. He has slept at his Dads and he can relax today.

Coconutty · 15/07/2012 17:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Arabellasmella · 15/07/2012 17:06

I'd keep him off and enjoy a day off together, I've no probs at all with an occasional sicky

ilovesooty · 15/07/2012 17:10

I'd keep him off and enjoy a day off together, I've no probs at all with an occasional sicky

Let's hope everyone who feels like that has employers who don't have a problem with it either.

ShellyBoobs · 15/07/2012 17:17

I've no probs at all with an occasional sicky

What a great lesson to children.

ilovesooty · 15/07/2012 17:33

I'm wondering if the OP's planning on returning, as she's just posted another thread about her son...

fivegomadindorset · 15/07/2012 17:37

YABU, we have just come back from holiday, we had a 14 drive back, arriving at 10.30 pm, I was at work by 8 and DC's age 6 and 3 were at school/pre school on time the next day, he is going to be a real charmer when he is older if you giving him such a shit attitude to life.

fivegomadindorset · 15/07/2012 17:38

14 hour drive

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