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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To let DS take the day off school on Monday?

77 replies

Tracheostomy · 14/07/2012 17:07

DS is 13 and has spent the past week in Berlin on a school trip. Lots of walking, sightseeing, partying, messing around at night time (I'm guessing, boys dorms!) and a veeeeerrrry long DRIVE home. He's had hardly any sleep since last Sunday.
He arrived back at school today and because of my work, he had to be picked up by his dad and spend another night away from his own bed - again his sleep will be minimum.

Last week at school - they won't be doing much - I feel sorry for him - I've told him to take Monday off school and go back Tuesday. I'm sure many people would "pull a sickie" at work under similar circumstances?

AIBU?

OP posts:
UnrequitedSkink · 14/07/2012 20:05

You're babying him, he's a big boy now. And you're sending him the wrong message if you let him stay off. Early night tomorrow and he'll be fine on Monday.

Nanny0gg · 14/07/2012 21:06

He can have early nights Sunday and Monday.

He'll be fine - send him in.

Shouldacouldawoulda · 14/07/2012 21:33

You've missed him and probably would love the extra day, but he would be fine at school. Your child, your choice.

COCKadoodledooo · 14/07/2012 21:36

YABU.

WerthersUnOriginal · 14/07/2012 21:43

If it's a school trip won't everyone that was on it be expected to turn up or it will look very obvious that it's a skive.

I wouldn't anyway though. I'd feel sorry etc about being tired but if everyone else is expected in...not good to make your ds feel he is a special case.

ChippingInNeedsCoffee · 14/07/2012 21:49

There's no way I'd let him have the day off after a school trip, all the kids are in the same situation and if the school thought it wise/necessary they'd have given them the day off. Your son will not be the only child not sleeping in their own (??) bed tonight. Old enough to go on the trip, old enough to go to school. It's not fair to jepordise the trip for future years - lots of early nights starting tomorrow night will sort him out.

ShellyBoobs · 14/07/2012 21:51

I'm sure many people would "pull a sickie" at work under similar circumstances?

Is that what you do when you're tired, OP?

I can say, in all honesty, that I've never "pulled a sickie" despite:

numerous bouts of jetlag from business trips;
a delayed flight home from holiday which meant I only arrived home at 4am on the day I returned to work;
Many silly mid-week nights out when I was young and silly.

It's not the norm to skive when you're 'a bit tired'.

Hmm
Annunziata · 14/07/2012 21:51

YABU. It's not ok to throw sickies at work either.

olympickibucket · 14/07/2012 21:53

Sorry, I'd send him to school on Monday unless he was quite clearly like death warmed up.

olympickibucket · 14/07/2012 21:57

And YY to everyone who doesn't approve of 'pulling a sickie'. That's the attitude that's given people who work for big anonymous organisations like Civil Service, Banks etc, a very bad name with those of us running or working in small businesses paying sillymoney taxes and putting up with daft regulations.

Kayano · 14/07/2012 21:59

No way

He is 13 not 3

Will you also be teaching him that it's ok not to go to work if he didn't sleep well? I don't think so! Terrible idea IMO!

If he messed about in the dorms it's his own problem

Theas18 · 14/07/2012 22:02

OUr kids have done this many times and are expected in cschool. It is made clear (we have even been back late and in school the nect day)

Squeegle · 14/07/2012 22:04

YABU

I would never pull a sickie for any reason, least of all after a holiday- its absolutely the wrong message to be Instilling in him.

blimey, if we all took a day off work every time we were a bit overtired, we'd never be in!

Squeegle · 14/07/2012 22:05

PS. Am not a Daily Mail reader either!

serin · 14/07/2012 22:42

My 10 and 11yr old DS's were on a week long school trip to France last week.

They arrived home over the weekend and were at school on the Monday morning.

Also, I work in the NHS, so No, I would never consider pulling a sickie Hmm

Floggingmolly · 14/07/2012 22:42

Won't his whole class be in the same boat? Confused
Can you seriously imagine everybody else doing the same thing????? Unless he's somehow more fragile that his classmates, you're being very precious.

TroublesomeEx · 14/07/2012 22:48

I'd send DS in (and have done) in similar circumstances.

You don't get to throw a sickie just because you're tired after a holiday!

So YABU.

Bluestocking · 14/07/2012 22:52

YABVVU indeed. His whole year group/class/whatever (and probably the teachers who had the dubious pleasure of accompanying them) will be equally tired. I don't take a day off after an exhausting holiday/tiring weekend and I don't expect anyone else to either.

ilovesooty · 14/07/2012 22:54

Since the OP has already told her son that he can have Monday off, I wonder if she's planning to tell him she's changed her mind?

StuntGirl · 14/07/2012 22:59

YABU. Send him in. He won't be doing anything super important in class during his last week that will require total concentration but you will be reinforcing the important life lesson that skiving is not acceptable and we attend and try our best even when tired.

I have gone to gigs in other cities, ended up on the 6am train back to my home town and had time for a quick wash/change then straight into work. Sometimes the tiredness is the price you pay for an awesome time! He'll have an early night Monday and be right as rain Tuesday.

33kns · 14/07/2012 23:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

babybythesea · 14/07/2012 23:02

Someone else who's never taken a day off for being tired. Not at school, and not at work either. I even went in after the plane I was coming home on late one evening caught fire - it was extremely frightening, we had to return to the place of departure (short flight and we'd only been in the air 10 minutes), it was late and they put us up in a hotel after deciding the plane wasn't safe to get back into (No s**t Sherlock!). I didn't sleep at all, got up very early for a flight back next morning and went into work. An hour late, but there.
I can think of only one occasion at school when I did miss the days back after a trip. I caught flu along with three others on the trip. I ran proper high temperatures, couldn't stand up without help and had a pounding headache - I got to stay home then but would have much preferred school to the way I felt.

I'd be sending him to bed early on Sunday if he's that tired. If he's not tired enough to go to bed early, he's not tired enough to miss school, in my book. And if he does go to bed early, he'll get a decent night's sleep and he'll be fine for school anyway. But I can see why you don't think sending him into school is important, if you also don't see going into work yourself as that important. (I didn't do a critical job, by the way, like a nurse or teacher, people could easily have covered for me. I just prefer people not to have to - I take pride in doing my job as best I can and that includes being there when i'm paid to be, not taking the piss).

TheMightyMojoceratops · 14/07/2012 23:03

Yabu: he's 13, not 3 - it's only school, not surgery! But where is OP?

McHappyPants2012 · 14/07/2012 23:04

I feel guilty when I have to take sick leave when I am sick, could never pull a sickie.

I would send him to school

Mamamaiasaura · 14/07/2012 23:06

YABU - he can sleep tomorrow.

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