To really detest the term "BREEDER"

[theboutiquemummy]

its often said with a sneer and i find it really offensive. Pregnant with DC1 and we have a couple of friends who are anti Breeders and its making it difficult to tell them, read I'm a coward and i've left it for now

any thoughts ?

I use it for men and women alike. I do try to avoid children if possible, I don't actually come across them too often at close range! This is anti natalism: 'Other proponents of antinatalism appeal to ethics; David Benatar, for example, argues from the hedonistic premise that the infliction of harm is morally wrong and to be avoided. He argues that the birth of a new person always entails nontrivial harm to that person, and therefore there is a moral imperative not to procreate'

Anti-natalist sounds like someone who runs antinatal (antenatal?) classes..

I don't really understand your explaination sorry Ponyofdoom; why is the infliction of harm hedonistic?
I thought hedonism means having a good time?
Why does giving birth to a 'new person' (aka a baby?) cause harm to that baby - it doesn't make sense?

It's a shame you avoid children; i really enjoy spending time with my cousin's boy & girl, aged 2 & 4 - they are sweet & funny. :)

We were invaded by a Child Free by Choice board on here some time ago.
That was a really interesting and informative evening.

Homosexual = Gayers

Heterosexual = Breeders

I've never heard either term used in an offensive way.

Most gay people i know seem to have a broad mixture of gay, bi, transsexual & straight friends & colleagues - & i think that my gay friends WOULD worry that using the word 'Breeders' would been see as offensive; they are nice & would worry about accidentally alienating or insulting us (straight friends) by using that term.

I'm not defending it VolAuVent just saying that is the usage I have come across.

I know MrsTerryPratchett. Just wondering about the logic of those who do use it in this context.

So anti-natalists believe it's morally wrong to have children?

Two questions; do you wish and hope for the end of the human race? And what are you doing in a parenting website?

Well Vicky I must be a breeder then. I have four dc and I am on benefits. Ive just had to give up my job for various reasons.

None of my four dc were born on benefits. I was in a relationship and both the ex and I had jobs. But we split as he was a twat and now here I am on income support.

Its such a horrible term, like comparing a human to a dog

My single and bitter friend told me about what a great time she had at a hens night with a bunch of other bitter and single women bitching about breeders and breeders-to-be like the bride. Thought it was odd that she wanted to tell me this.

I am single and not bitter ( well, not about THAT...)- and the only people I know who are having kids are all my gay friends

It doesn't really bother me if it is said in an ironic/joking way.

Slightly off topic here (but at the same time not) it's all very well to express horror at the childfree lot saying they don't want to be around kids, and yet so many people on MN are sneery about OPC(other people's children).

In that they can't stand them.

In fact, many a mnetter has said "I don't like any kids but my own", which to me is basically the same thing as saying you don't like kids.

Which is fine (if strange to me that you would choose to have children when you have never liked them!) but then you can object to childfree people saying they don't like children either.

Innit?

I don't think all single women are bitter (I wasn't, perfect me). But I think women who mock a bride as a potential breeder probably are.

Seems I'm not the only one who needs new friends

I wrote a blog post about OPC a while ago and when you need to mentally slap yourself
And realise that your own kids are
Just a member of the OPC to every one else lol.

I don't dislike other peoples children, but I certainly have less patience with them lol

Someone said it to me once. It didn't bother me, he just made himself look like a dick.

A gay mate has used it to me, but in the full understanding that it was a joke which I was ok with. My genuinely antinatalist dark green friend otoh would never use it (well, not where I might hear him) because it would be grossly offensive.

I think it's funny. It doesn't bother me.

When my gay friends have used it, it encompasses all straight people, not just women so not sexist in my book.

I might be tempted to ask them if they were heterophobic.

I've just seen breed on another thread, it reminds me of dogs or horses

I have heard it used by gay people and by childfree couples, it is MEANT as a put down, so obviously it is not nce