to think people should be a bit more sensitive when discussing things in public in front of people they don't know?

[FioFio]

I have just stood behind a couple of women in Tesco I don't know why I go there, it's convenient berating the fact that children with special needs get free transport to school and how bloody dare they blah blah blah and why on earth aren't their parents means tested

I mean what the actual fuck

Was sat behind a man at the doctors bemoaning the number immigrants cluttering up the NHS. He also thought GPs should charge £15 an appointment which would means only those genuinely ill enough would turn up. He then changed his mind and said those who made appointments but didn't turn up should be billed £15, with failure to pay meaning getting removed from GP list. He and the pensioner couple he was talking to were quite enjoying putting the world to rights.

FioFio, your chapt should be a panellist on Matthew Wright or Question Time, they know SFA too.

So they should only have an opinion about things behind closed doors?

Are you annoyed that they have an opinion or that they think families should be mean tested?

I think they should be more careful, yes - they are showing themselves up in public, and run the risk of having you put them straight!

Why aren't they means tested? People are entitled to an opinion, we're lucky to live in a country of free speech.

Annoying as it is its a thing called freedom of speech.

agree ppl should possibly be fined for missing appointments without good cause

agree that immigrants put a huge strain on the nhs and other resources

why shouldnt he say what he feels even if it doesnt agree with what you think. You are inferring he is intolerant, arent you equally guilty of intolerance towards his views?

I know exactly what you mean Fio. It's not about free speech, it's about being downright rude. I 'caught' a couple of horrible, thick, tiger mums discussing my nephew (who has complex special needs) very loudly in the playground last week and it upset me terribly. If my sister had any idea what, and the manner in which, they were discussing her son, she would be heartbroken. Not offended, heartbroken.

I think there is a big difference between discussing a person, such as VonHerrs nephew, which is horrible, and just expressing an opinion.

But why are they being downright rude ?? They are having a discussion amongst themselves that someone nehind in the queue is listening in to!! Its not like they are standing there with a microphone telling all and sundry how they feel about it......

People talk shite...fact of life!

The other day DP bought some trainers in JD sports, there were two friends one in the queue in front of us and one behind us, their children were tearing around the shop whilst they were shopping.

One woman to the other 'I need to go to savers to get some foundation next' other woman in reply to her friend 'oh I'm a MAC girl me, you can't get MAC in savers'

I don't quite know why but this conversation made me shudder, why must people shout their conversations??

Since I didn't air my views and he did in a waiting room I'd say I was very tolerant, as were others in the waiting room, some of whom were not born in this country. However, imo he was more ignorant than intolerant, since the reason we were all waiting and there was a notice stating such, was the surgery was unusually two GPs short and their replacements started later in the week. Hiking those MN judgy pants, I also did wonder how much his super-size girth and resulting ill-health might have more claim on NHS resources than many other people, but as he kept saying "I've paid in and now it's my turn to get something out"

at snaplegs

Can't resist joining in to say that yes, if you miss an appointment at the gp you should pay! My surgery has a three strikes and you're out policy (which I applaud). Obviously they don't apply it to people who might miss appointments because of memory problems etc.

Anyway, I don't really see the point of this op. People shouldn't say anything anyone else might be offended at in public?

Oh, and on the whole transport to school thing... My neighbour got a free taxi to and from school every week day. Because of poor sight. Fair enough - yes? Except at weekends she happily hopped on a bus TO THE SAME SCHOOL to go to a drama club and meet her friends. She didn't get the bus during the week because the taxi was on offer to her for free - at huge expense over the course of her 7 year secondary school career. Insane.

Oh god I've had my share of people like this

my sibling is very severely autistic, physically in good health but is so mentally impaired, limited speech, can't make herself a drink.

the jobcentre demanded she have an interview to prove she can't work, every time my mum was asked a question she just smiled and said

'address your questions to her' pointing at my sis.

BigWheel I think policies vary but where I live parents are effectively means-tested, you can only get help with transport to school if you are on free school meals or get the maximum level of working families tax credit even if your child has SEN. Technically the LEA are required to provide help with transport if the only school the child can attend is more than a certain distance from home but this is true for all children not just those with SEN. The people in front of FioFio were having a nasty moan about people with children with SEN getting 'perks' which was ignorant to boot.

I don't think it has 'owt to do with free speech unless FioFio was suggesting criminalising their behaviour. She was just complaining about people being rude and petty and not thinking about the impact what they are saying might have on others.

For the same reason although I keep my trap shut about my hatred of people who name their children stupid names (not going to be specific on here because other people's opinions about stupid names may differ), drive stupid cars, read stupid newspapers or eat stupid food I tend to keep my opinions to myself in public because I don't want to cause hurt or offence.

So what hawkmoon? I presume that the buses during the school run hours are packed to the gills (if they're anything like the buses around here) and quieter on a Saturday, therefore it would be harder for a person who is partially sighted to negotiate?

Bigwheel, I expect you could try to make an argument that transport should be means-tested. But then you actually have to look at the situation:
Why are children not using the usual transport?
Where are they going?
What would happen if it was removed and the child went to a different school?
Did the parents choose to send the child there?

In our case:
--because he goes to somehwere not on the bus route
--which is 18 miles away, so he can't walk it
--he'd be at the local school, which openly said it couldn't cope with him and wouldn't try
--no we didn't, but see above!

So, would you charge us for it, if we had more than a certain income?

I agree, a good friend of mine has a dc with cerabral palsy (he is 5) he can only walk short distances so she has a special pushchair style/looking wheelchair for him.
I have personally witnessed people verbally abuse my friend, saying she is keeping her child in a pushchair because she is too lazy to let him walk, or that she is abusing him by forcing him to sit in a pushchair when he is far too old.

Freedom of speech is fantastic, but it is not an excuse for not thinking (or looking around to see who might be listening) before opening your mouth

But there is a difference between deliberately saying something rude and hurtful to someone and having a private conversation which someone is listening to.

lancelottie would depend if you have been given a car in order to use for you child /ren by the state? Would also depend on whetever you are getting carers allowance? A family near us have been brought a ford galaxy so parents can attend appointments etc, neither parent work as that would mean they would lose some of their benefits effectively making them poorer. School only 1/2 miles away yet a taxi picks up and drops off each school day. the parents then get into the galaxy, and drive to the local golf course, phasing the school on there way. I really want to blame the parents, but I actually also blame the system for allowing such things to happen.

sheisthecats She managed rush hour tube trains ok. By her own admission she could easily have got the bus. But a taxi was provided... Made me so cross.

Some people are just twats though,you can't stop random people having opinions ,just be thankful you don't know them.

Somehow, your golf-playing family don't seem, let's say, a typical example of school transport. Am crap at golf anyway.

Anyhow: no, we don't have a state-provided car.
No, I don't claim carer's allowance.

So, do you still want to means-test us?