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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be an ungrateful mare?

28 replies

kazmus · 30/06/2012 13:51

my dh likes to experiment in the kitchen (food only, no shades of grey or 9 and a half weeks here!) and has discoverered a new signature dish. He has just got back from shopping for the ingredients and announced he will do it tonight for dinner. I know I should be so grateful he is so thoughtful etc, but it is foul!! Haven't got the heart to tell him but already feeling nauseous at the prospect.

OP posts:
emsyj · 30/06/2012 13:53

My DH sometimes cooks really revolting things (he is an enthusiastic and 'experimental' cook too). I am now honest, as I think it's easier than pretending (and I'm rubbish at pretending/lying). I feel a bit mean, but I can't stomach eating something that I don't like. I think you need to tell him, otherwise you could be 'treated' to a weekly serving of it more or less forever!

fivegomadindorset · 30/06/2012 13:53

What is it?

LightbulbSoup · 30/06/2012 13:56

What is he cooking? Does it include something he knows you hate because if so then he shouldn't expect you to eat it. I might just try a bit and if it is unpalatable then make sure you've got plenty wine to wash it down with.

Petsinmypudenda · 30/06/2012 13:58

You need to tell us what it is

ImperialBlether · 30/06/2012 13:59

Please tell us what it is!

Let him cook enough for two, freeze half of it and order yourself a takeaway.

Watch his face as he realises he's the only one who has to eat his own creation.

Original poster
kazmus · 30/06/2012 13:59

it's his own take on a rissotto, shouldn't be too hard to make inedible but bless him he takes it to a new level!!

OP posts:
Original poster
kazmus · 30/06/2012 14:00

it's his little face as he carries in the plate....it would be like kicking a puppy!!

OP posts:
fivegomadindorset · 30/06/2012 14:00

What on earth does he do to it/put in it to make it inedible?

SauvignonBlanche · 30/06/2012 14:03

How does he ruin a risotto? Confused

Original poster
kazmus · 30/06/2012 14:05

don't know...do you think I should I should hovver and watch the process and jump in when he goes wrong?

OP posts:
TheArmadillo · 30/06/2012 14:05

oh I tell mine, he is also rather experimental combined with little cooking ability, which is why I do the cooking - you don't have to say 'dear god that is an abomination to food and I would rather die than choke down a tiny mouthful'

Just that although it looks lovely its not to your taste.

soozeedol · 30/06/2012 14:06

aww...it's a shame to kick him when he's feeling pride in his creation...but think you need to be truthful and gentle...

not an easy one so I sympathise....

maybe you could pretend to be ever so interested and help him prepare and cook it together....maybe you could perform a rescue by advising on cooking as you go along...saying it's experimental and maybe this and maybe that will improve it even more, etc....open the wine and get flirty...you'll be into a winning situ and hopefully a decent dinner!!!

Original poster
kazmus · 30/06/2012 14:11

I know I should be more honest...I can't make cakes to save my life and when I tried he took a picture and put it on facebook next to a hacksaw!

OP posts:
valiumredhead · 30/06/2012 14:12

Why is it so horrible?

Thistledew · 30/06/2012 14:23

I'm another one who is curious as to what can go so wrong with risotto. The two main faults are undercooking or having it too sloppy. I suppose failing to add anything for flavour would make it pretty unappetising too.

How about trying saying "Is it meant to be like that? It is not like the one I had in that restaurant that time. I prefer it how they did it" might get the hint across that all is not well with his creation.

Viviennemary · 30/06/2012 14:30

Buy him a recipe book. I'm not a great cook myself for everyday stuff. But if I follow a recipe it turns out usually quite good.

mysteryfairy · 30/06/2012 14:35

My husband also makes foul risotto - sloppy, salty and otherwise flavourless. Although it's really bad for risotto it is edible - not like being confronted with jellied eel or something. I just force it down - think he thinks its a bit weird that I like tomato ketchup on risotto... I would just grin and bare it on this one.

Mrsjay · 30/06/2012 14:42

oh i thought i had posted then Dh makes this curry and it is foul i cant eat it its far to creamy I did eventually tell him I didnt really like the cream so he put natural yoghart in it instead, was just a foul Confused I know dont eat it i told him I wasnt to keen his little face fell but at least i dont have to eat it again.

perplexedpirate · 30/06/2012 14:43

Rub tummy and make 'Mmmmm' noise a la Joey from Friends when Rachel makes the beef trifle.
Then surreptitiously scrape it into the bin.

Original poster
kazmus · 30/06/2012 14:51

perplex I think i have to go with your kinder option. He does use a recipe, but somehow manages to undercook the rice while still being slimy and just .....eugh!! Bless I think his taste buds are going with age, should be grateful at his age he's not one of the old school 'get my dinner wench' types.

OP posts:
Mia4 · 30/06/2012 16:19

I'd be honest with him if its gross, chances are he guesses/knows/feels the same when he tries it anyway. Takeaway night maybe?

I say tell him because not telling him ensures more repeats of the same dish :(

CaliforniaLeaving · 30/06/2012 16:44

Oh dear tell him or you'll be facing this same undercooked slimy meal for many years to come.

MrsTrellisOfSouthWales · 30/06/2012 16:57

Coming from the other side of this ... I am the experimental through it all together type cook, and DH comes from a eat everything on your plate background. You'd think it'd be a great combination but on the occasion I produce something absolutely minging, he troughs it down- which is quite disheartening. Although knowing the response would be "you could have cooked something yourself" I guess he's stuck between a rock and a hard place.

QuietTiger · 30/06/2012 16:59

DH has a "phrase" which following several disasters by me and him not wanting to hurt my feelings is now used by both of us when the other cooks and creates something foul is "experimental".

"It's very naice, but I wouldn't crave for it again"...

Mrsjay · 30/06/2012 17:07

Joey ate the trifle though Grin