to expect my dinner made for me if H was going out and I wasnt?

[bogeyface]

Because apparantly it isnt U for him to expect that.

On a related note, AIBU to answer "no idea, there is the usual in the freezer"? cos it appeared from his face and slightly snotty attitude that I am.

On a further related note AIBU to wonder why it is assumed that I will make sure that the kids are fed and everything is sorted for bed, even if they arent actually in bed, when he just goes out?

Another related note, AIBU to not expect a slightly sniffy "oh, ok then" when i announce I have a meeting that will be over school run time on his day off (the day we agreed he does childcare so I can work a full day)? Presumably this is because I have been back in time to pick them up for the last 2 weeks.

Which one do you want answered?

Bad day...?

All of them, please!

Or whichever you cba to answer I suppose!

Oooh can we have a bonus question?

Better not cost £1.10p from a BT land line and mobiles considerably more though...

I can't understand the question, it appears to be in the form of a riddle

Thank you

Alright, here is the short version.

Is he a twat or AIBU for being pissed off that there are two sets of rules? One for his social and work life, the rule being that I do everything as he is going to work or "out". The other for my work and social life, being that I do everything as I am "leaving him to it".

Is that better?

So he has been slightly snotty, slightly sniffy and had a look on his face? Ignore, ignore, ignore. Either he will come out with his objections at which point ou can argue your case or he won't and then you have no problem.

Sorry, reading it back, it is a bit of a disjointed rant isnt it? I know what I meant and you are now all BU :o

Too the second AIBU....YANBU.

Yabu calling us U when you can write a post that we can understand.

Brief synopsis; He expects to be catered for whether you're late or going out but doesn't reciprocate In either case? Answer; Treat him the same and wait til he moans, it's a 2 way street in my book. When he moans ask him why he thinks you don't need the same courtesy, if he replies "it's a male/female thing" kick him in the nuts and tell him to think longer next time :) honestly, if I'm at home/have more spare time I cook/clean/wash etc I understood marriage was a partnership not a one way dictatorship?

Bogey, it's not exactly the first instance of twuntishness from him though, is it?

My limits would have been breached by now. In fact, they were. Hence Ex-P being the ex.

Oh, and YAdefinitelyNBU.

• can's should be can't

Bogey, I know exactly what you mean. If I am going to be late home I will leave instructions and most of the food already made for supper. If DH expects to be late I have already made supper.
WTF?

couthy that would be the understatement of the century. But things are happening that mean that I need to stay for the moment. I just resent being expected to do things (thank you mutant, good synopsis) when they arent given back. Made a rod for my own back i suspect.....

Bogey I understood your post and can categorically state YANBU.

Might be a good idea to sit down with your DH at some quiet, non stressful time and agree a set of guidelines and responsibilities for nights out which are independant of whether you have a penis or not.

He is a Bastard, coated in crispy Bastard with a Bastard filling...liberally coated with Bastard flakes and rounded off with a Bastard cherry on top.

Leave him!

HTH

Sorry, been a bad day and feeling a bit bleurgh.

Feel free to wander off and ignore! I think i will!

YANBU.

:o worra! I love "coated in crispy bastard"!

Worra That had to be the best 'bastard phrase'....EVER!!!!!!

Ah, yes I get it now.

It is a form of male "logic" unknown to women. And totally unreasonable. So no, YANBU

YANBU (the actual you, not the rhetorical you).

Come and live with us.

I would like to share a breakthrough I had recently. DH could have a fight with himself in a phonebox and no matter how hard I try to make him see my point of view it's a waste of breath.

So I have stopped engaging. Never explain, never apologise. It's a great rule and is working well for me so far :)