AIBU to think this secondary school writing exercise to be inappropriate?

[dikkertjedap]

Here

-Mrs Walker said: "He handed it to me one evening and then just went upstairs to bed-

sounds to me like a teenager (with bloody terrible literary skills), who thought it would be amusing to freak his mother out..

also, as MrsMcEnroe just said, when he handed it to her, even if he said nothering and wandered off upstairs, the mother should have walked up after him and asked what on earth it was ..

I'd be horrified if either of my DDs were asked to write something like this when they are older. I think they could find it very upsetting. DD1 has had cancer and we've known a number of children who went through treatment at the same time as her who didn't get better. I hope the teacher that set the work was well aware of the personal circumstances of every child in the class.

I would be more concerned about my child's spelling and punctuation!

Peppermint I am sure the teacher was well aware of the personal circumstances of the students in her class.

I teach subject(s) were personal issues are taught, discussed and written about and any decent teacher does it with empathy and sensitivity. Not being an English teacher I have never set this particular writing exercise but students must find ways of confronting these issues in a safe environment. It helps build resilience for real life.

I'm sorry that people don't like the term scaffolding, but call it whatever you want a good teacher could have got active and genuine learning from these students. Or not. The article doesn't really contain enough evidence for us to assess anything much.

Sarcalogos-How many children do you think a secondary English teacher teaches in a week? Hundreds! Aware of all their personal circumstances? I don't think so .If this exercise had to be done at all, then PSHE would surely have been the place to do it.
My children's secondary school have never done anything like this!

Agree with Sarcalogos. If a pupil is facing a particular difficulty in their private life and the parents have been sensible enough to inform the school then OBVIOUSLY they are going to be sensitive to the feelings of the pupils and plan accordingly. I don't think there is anything wrong with the task. It's probably linked to a text such as 'Two Weeks With The Queen'. I do, however, think there is something wrong with going to the press over such a trivial issue. I feel for the lad who wrote it! Perhaps this was the first piece of writing he had really engaged with, and perhaps he said things that he hadn't said before. He's fourteen, likely he doesn't communicate well, and he shows a piece of work to his mum and she freaks out and goes to the press!
The other possibility is that the school is crap because it's an academy and they've employed an unqualified teacher.

I imagine a secondary English teacher teaches roughly the same number of children as I do in a week Ariadne?

I also think you are forgetting the primary learning objectives of this task, which presumably were English based? Emotive writing is part of their curriculum.

I remember we were reading a book once and in the last part a boy is killed in a gas explosion.

One boy's brother was killed in a gas explosion that term, so we stopped reading it.

Teachers do know what's going on in their students' lives.

YABU and so is this boy's mother for making a mountain out of a molehill and going to the press with her son's innermost thoughts.

It's not her son's innermost thoughts because, AFAIK, her son isn't dying of a terminal illness. It's creative writing about dying.

I actually find it quite voyeuristic, slightly perverse and insulting to the families who genuinely have lost their children in such tragic circumstances.

Tipped him over into what? I don't understand this expression.

I see issue with how the son just presented it to his mum and walked off, not with the assignment itself. I think considering death and dying, whether in English or any other type of class, is useful. It happens, it is going to happen, there are tons of emotions and issues around it, and discussing it and exploring can have loads of benefits. It should be treated as a valid part of reality as anything else, rather than a taboo to be hidden away (which I find far more insulting and isolates those who have gone through it).

I think you have enough of your life to consider death and dying without having it foisted on you when you're 14.

I think most 14 year olds consider dark subjects already.

Tipped him over into what? I don't understand this expression

Well for DS it would have been the pit of despair....my mum was dying, it was a very stressful time so to have to write a piece at school would have been a bit much for him. I didnt tell his teacher what was going on with my family, it never occurred to me.

Maybe it could have helped him express what he was feeling, Betty?

I can understand that in some cases it might be difficult. In the case mentioned, it wasn't though.

Possibly Yellow, I dont know. I know I wouldnt have been able to deal with it though, not then anyway!

I suppose there are some parents who will never be happy and who will complain without a valid reason.

Soldiers do this when on active service - write notes for family to be given in the event of their own death. Quite often they are very young and doing it 'for real' so to speak. 14 year olds are more young adult than children after all.

carben- do you have any teenage children?

How would people feel about their 11 yo being made to write a suicide note?

He wrote about his life, his relationships and his property. He wrote about what was important to him. This was the point of the exercise. His mum then went to the press with it!

Ariadne, he did not write a suicide note.

Ariadne -I have two 7 year olds but I did help bring up my 26 year old step-daughter from the age of 4 - so went through the teenage years with her. She went through a very difficult time (still is to some extent) as her mum has mental health problems and my step-daughter hated her for it and protected her all at the same time. In many ways she was the adult in their relationship. By the age of 14 she was making her own choices about where she stayed (previously had been with dad in the week and mum at the weekends since the age of 3). She often chose to get away from her mum but never 'left' her and was very adult about how she dealt with things. We talked alot. Kids can handle alot more than we give them credit for or recognise. Dying is a big issue but it's our reality and if you think 14 year olds are unaware of this or never think about it then you're wrong. Talking about it and expressing it rather than bottling it up is a much better way of dealing with life and death.

Probably going to get blasted here BUT we read a book called
Before I die with a lower sixth form book group.

It is a popular book aimed at teens and as part of the discussion the students prepare a list of things they want to do in the event they are diagnosed with a terminal illness. This might include writing to parents, losing their virginity, visiting a particular place etc, etc.

It isn't to put ideas of suicide into their heads - nobody can do that unless the idea is already there. Instead, it enables students to talk about and explore feelings, empathise with the main protagonist of the book, have an understanding of life and death (pardon the pun) and open up a sometimes lively debate about a subject that sometimes parents may find hard to discuss with them.

When I read the OP and article I felt that this was a similar exercise. It is a creative writing piece after all. However, as a parent just finding the piece of writing without understanding the context would have frightened me stupid!
Once I knew the context, it would have been a perfect opening for my child to be able to discuss particular fears and (mis)understandings that surround death and illness.

I think YABU.

We wrote our own obituaries in Year 5/6 (joys of a Catholic primary school!) and drew our own gravestones for a graveyard display on the classroom wall. I was about to say there were no issues but I've just realised that at the time a pupil's Dad was terminally ill! As far as I know there were no complaints from parents, or pupils, as the display stayed up for months.

It sounds like a really imaginative piece of work. I used to love doing things like this at school, as I found it really interesting to try and get into someone else's mindset.

Presumably with exercises like this the teacher would be extra careful, and would not have done it if the school were aware of any pupils with terminally ill family members.

The boy's behaviour sounds odd and inappropriate really. Why on earth would he just hand it to his Mum without saying anything?! It seems to me that maybe he had used the opportunity to express himself either as a cry for help, or because he was too shy/embarrassed/"macho" to tell his family how he felt, or perhaps he was just trying to wind her up. I think she is very wrong to have taken it to the press either way.

And she is being very melodramatic, it seems unlikely that in the time it took her to read the note he would have got upstairs and successfully hanged himself!

I vaguely remember having to do this. I'm only 21 so was still at school not many years ago. Can't remember what I wrote though. It didn't seem odd at the time, but reading that article, from another POV it can be quite a disturbing excercise.