to question what should happen next

[worriedwretch]

a 3rd party - who is employed by the council to teach my daughter (not a school teacher, but an activity in the ciriculum) has passed on information regarding my DD to a 3rd party (who happens to be DD's biological father, my violent ex) regarding DD's whereabouts during school days and activities, and invited him along to come and spectate - as will be in the "public" area.

the school are concerned and have contacted me asking what I would like them to do.... what do i do?

EX is not allowed contact unless prior agreed with me (as per court order which school have copy of)

Am a bit clearer now. For some reason, I thought that the swimming instructor had met your ex for the first time and was completely unaware of the history.

Have you talked to the police and told them that eh has expressed an intention to break the terms of the court order?

Your 'friend' is an idiot, btw. There is no way you can forget about this. If it wasn't a big deal, then you wouldn't have the order in the first place!

Can any one help me complain about the staff member?

Who do I complain to the pool / council?

I would complain to both the pool AND the council.

right I now have pool general managers name and email

who do i go to at the council?

hi ww

perhaps you could take a copy of the court order and complain to the manager of the pool?

sorry if that's not very helpful.

how was the meeting with the school?
(((((((((((hugs))))))))))))

x-posts sorry

Hmm... you could either address it to the head of "leisure services" or whatever the pool comes under in your council, or maybe the head of the education dept? It's difficult, the pool is a 3rd party and separate from the school, but if your DD goes to swimming lessons through the school (iyswim), then maybe it would come under the education dept's remit?

"who do i go to at the council"

I would phone the general Local Authority number and ask if they have a complaint manager for complaints against staff members that have broken confidentiality guidelines.

I would log the call and follow upwith an email. All emails to a complaints manager comes out as a print and cannot be lost. They have to answer you within 28 days.

perhaps you could take a copy of the court order and complain to the manager of the pool

This will confuse things. Every Local Authority has its own internal complaints procedure and it will go higher than the manager. You can outline the nature of the complaint and then he should direct this to the relevent team.

If you get nowhere, go to your MP, they will take this up and Local Authorities act when MP's are involved.

I dont want to scare you Worried but, If the ex now knows the school and area it is in will he be able to work out where you live?

Even if you dont think he could, you could raise this also as an issue, that they may have caused you to have to move home / schools because of their tittle tattle.

Is the pool still run by the local authority? Leisure centres in my area are now managed by a private company. I don't know if this could have any impact on your situation.

spoken to council have the email address of the complaints person

now what

yeah, he could work out where we live. Great isnt it. Makes me think he obviously doesnt take the court order seriously any more.

Surely when a court order stats what contact should be, he shouldnt be angling to get more by devious means??

Firstly, you still want your DD to participate - so what steps can the school introduce to make it safe for her? Is the issue him seeing her, or interacting with her? Would an additional teacher being allocated to supervise just her on these outings (at least until the review from this stuff up is worked out), be enough?

Secondly, was the pool person having a brain freeze moment, or are they seriously thinking this was the right thing to do? Getting them sacked might be hard considering it is likely a contractor to the facility, owned by the Council with services requested by the school - plenty of buck passing around before someone takes responsibility.

Thirdly, is this in breach of the court order? By telling the school he is planning to attend, if he is spotted at the premises can the police be called?

Good luck, hopefully a solution can be found that doesn't involve moves, new schools etc.

I think you should have your solicitor write to him and clarify the terms of the court order, and that if he does appear anywhere your DD is then you will be following that up with courts and police.

I also think you have to withdraw DD from the event which is but unavoidable, although you could perhaps seek police support - they've been outside DS school a couple of times and I assume it's to do with child protection issues at pick up.

Cheeky bump for you lot. Need advice!

What a nightmare bump.

Bump for you. What have the school said now? Have they got back to you?