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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think this was horrible behaviour and not want anything to do with my friend ever again?

67 replies

BellaBahBooBoo · 16/06/2012 15:30

I have a friend that I've known for a few years, and to be fair she's always been nice enough but had a bit of a snobby outlook. In the past she has made comments aimed towards me about not being able to afford the same types of shops as her for clothes for the DCs. She likes Boden, Fat Face and John Lewis and I go to H&M and Primark as my budget is small. She has referred to me in the past as a bargain hunter, which I'm not sure I find all that flattering. It's not a choice of bargain hunting for a little fun but more because I have to bargain hunt.

She also often brings a friend when we meet up, who she sees a lot more frequently when she sees me and to be honest she creeps and crawls to this other friend and treats her like the queen, then I get sidelined whilst we're out and ignored, they sometimes walk along arm in arm and talk about things that I know nothing about and am not party to, things like expensive holidays they have booked together or nights out they have been on.

We met up on Wednesday last week. We live about an hour's drive away from each other so we meet in a city which is a halfway point for us both and we each get the train there. On Wednesday she turned up with this friend again, which I didn't mind too much, but they did their usual chatting away and I may as well not have been there. We then went into a big department store and my friend said to me "M and I are going to go off and have a look at the baby clothing so we'll come and find you in, maybe, half an hour?". I was a bit put out but as I don't have a baby and her friend does, I thought maybe they thought they were being nice and that I'd want to look at other things. After about an hour of me looking around the store they came and found me. We then went into another large store and at the entrance my friend said again "We're going to go off and have a wander, we'll find you in a little while". I was feeling quite upset but I didn't say anything, I don't know why I didn't. It was a shop I wanted to go in so I looked around, bought a couple of things, then had a look for them both and couldn't find them anywhere so I thought "fuck this" and left the store, got a taxi to the station and went home as they clearly didn't want me there.

My friend didn't text or contact me but when I got home she had sent me a PM on Facebook saying that clearly I had gone off without them and she was very disappointed as she'd travelled a long way to meet me. I haven't replied to her as I think our friendship is over, and I don't like the way she is turning it all round back to being my fault when she acted in a nasty way towards me.

OP posts:
ToryLovell · 16/06/2012 15:32

She's a cow and you are better off without her.

Nanny0gg · 16/06/2012 15:33

Defriend and ignore.

susiedaisy · 16/06/2012 15:33

I think your friendship is over tbh I wouldn't bother with her again, not sure why she arranges to meet with you then brings someone else and then spends most of the day with this other friendConfused all rather pointless IMO did she not even phone you when you went home wondering if you were ok?? Hmm

squeakytoy · 16/06/2012 15:34

Yanbu at all , I would have gone home the first time they did it ..

BellaBahBooBoo · 16/06/2012 15:35

No she didn't phone me susiedaisy. To me that said it all really about our friendship

OP posts:
CrispyCod · 16/06/2012 15:36

What a bitch, you're well rid!

Witchofthenorth · 16/06/2012 15:36

You were friends with her why??

I should be looking for better friends...you know ones who actually want to spend time with you.

Get rid!!

BellaBahBooBoo · 16/06/2012 15:37

I think she had built our friendship on feeling superior to me, I don't think she really liked me, and I think she liked the power of going off with the other friend and leaving me out. Hope she feels great about herself now

OP posts:
susiedaisy · 16/06/2012 15:37

bella I think your right! Deep down she has very little respect or concern for you, as others have said defriend and move on.

BellaBahBooBoo · 16/06/2012 15:38

I have just this very moment deleted her from facebook, hooray!

OP posts:
scarletforya · 16/06/2012 15:38

Good for you for going home. Sounds to me that she enjoys 'lording it over you' and only wanted you there to make herself feel superior. She's an eejit. Good riddance to her.

iamme43 · 16/06/2012 15:39

I would reply back and just say I couldn't find you so I went home.

Then just leave it at that and don't meet up again.

swearytramp · 16/06/2012 15:39

She sounds quite revolting. You are worth more than this.

BellaBahBooBoo · 16/06/2012 15:40

I have just this very moment deleted her from facebook, hooray!

OP posts:
BellaBahBooBoo · 16/06/2012 15:40

Dunno why that posted twice?

OP posts:
Dprince · 16/06/2012 15:40

Well she sounds a treat. Wtf, you did the right thing. I can't believe she didn't even call you to see where you were. You did the right thing.

Panzee · 16/06/2012 15:40

She sounds about 12. You are well rid.

everlong · 16/06/2012 15:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

daisyrain · 16/06/2012 15:42

Be thankful that she is an hour away.
Dont respond to her stupid message.
Shes the one that kept going off!
You sound better off without her.

AThingInYourLife · 16/06/2012 15:42

She sounds horrible and really weird.

No loss, that's for sure.

Thumbwitch · 16/06/2012 15:42

Good grief, glad you decided to leave and glad you've got rid of her! How very bloody rude to dismiss you in that way and go off with her other friend - just so unbelievably bad-mannered!

There are some seriously weird people out there...

MarysBeard · 16/06/2012 15:43

She sounds about 12.

NovackNGood · 16/06/2012 15:43

Why did you not just call her when you had finished looking around the shop? If hey did not want to look around the shop you did then surely once you were finished you could have just called to say you were now finished with your browsing.

At the end of the day it seems neither of you are that bothered about the friendship.

Gingefringe · 16/06/2012 15:44

It's really sad when friendships come to an end, but you have to ask yourself what you're getting out of it - very little by the sound of things and I agree that you're well rid. She sounds spoilt and snobbish. Hope her new 'friend' treats her the same way one day.

ArthurandGeorge · 16/06/2012 15:44

Sounds awful! You are better off without this woman in your life.

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