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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to think Alicia Douvall is an unfit parent?

102 replies

LinaLamont · 12/06/2012 21:23

I'm watching a docu-soap on BBC 3 and feel so sorry for her older daughter - who has to be behave like a parent. It's awful.

OP posts:

Rockpool · 13/06/2012 09:29

The mother made sure she didn't take drugs or alcohol,has nice friends which she met,ensured she's not up to no good out on the street,wasn't taking medication as she was bfing etc.She has provided a nice clean home,clothes,an education and most of all love.She's clearly besotted with her dd and her dd clearly loves her.

We see her straight after surgery,all kids want to nurture their parents when they're unwell,mine certainly do.The difference is the mother is an addict to surgery.She clearly realises she has a problem.I'm not an addict but from what you read any addiction isn't easy to conquer.

Cockwomble · 13/06/2012 10:18

I am utterly that anyone thinks alicia douvall is a good mother.

Yes she loves the DD, and provides the essentials.

But the therapy that child will need when she's older. The mother acts like a child.

porcamiseria · 13/06/2012 11:19

aye...

but this is where I wonder what good splitting them up wuld do? nowt most likely

tis a shame

NameGotLostInCyberspace · 13/06/2012 11:27

I watched it and felt so sorry for Georgia. Left to fend for a 7 wekk old baby whilst "Mum" was having surgery and missing an exam to boot!

Alicia was not allowing her to socialise for her own selfish reasons and believe she wanted her at gome to help with Papaya.

Cockwomble · 13/06/2012 11:49

Someone did tweet last night "papya coco piri - is she a baby or a menu?"

I agree namegotlost

whiterthanwhite · 13/06/2012 12:17

Cockwomble

Agree with everything you have said.

Me and my siblings were well dressed as children, always went to school and worked hard, didnt have boyfriends, take drugs, drink alcohol and went on to get good jobs.

However we were used as an emotional crutch by our mum, we parented her not the other way round. Everything was about her. When our dad died when I was 16, she cried that she'd lost her husband but never asked us how we felt. I couldnt wait to leave home and walked out when I was 17. Neither myself or siblings have had much contact with my mum for last 20 years or so.

We are where we are today in spite of our mum. When I was growing up my goal was not to be like my mum and do everything differently and we did!!
we

Birdsgottafly · 13/06/2012 13:05

You couldn't decide based on this programme whether Georgia should have been removed, or now Papya.

What there are though, are two men who have left these children totally unsupervised with Alicia. She is fighting her last partner to get him to step up as Papya's father, she says she has DNA evidence.

In a follow up interview she has apologised to Georgia, saying that she didn't realise what missing the exam meant.

The plastic surgery that she went for was to correct former botched facial implants, which meant that she couldn't smile. She realise on modelling for money so whilst the timing should have been better, it wasn't non essential.

The only main worry is the effect on Georgia and Papya, because work will dry up for Alicia and she will probably go down hill very fast.

RubyFakeNails · 13/06/2012 13:24

Completely agree with Birds where are the fathers? Why aren't they being slated. I watched the program and I don't think Georgia made it clear the mock counted. Really Alicia should have checked but an unfit mother I don't think so.

In some ways I would say her and her daughters relationship mirrors the one I have with my mother so I can empathise with Georgia.

If people say she should have her children removed because they don't agree with her parenting (she is parenting her not neglecting her) that's like saying right all the bnp me,bets should have their children removed. Yes the parenting is not to everyone's tastes but she provides for her, loves her and they both seem happy.

I do wonder how she will be in 20 years, with no modelling work or publicity.

Cockwomble · 13/06/2012 13:32

Hey I haven't said ANYTHING about children being removed.

The surgery was non essential, it wasn't an emergency and she was still doing photo shoots despite her smiling problem - it could have waited until AFTER georgia's exams. Having a tantrum and accusing your daughter of making any excuse is bollocks.

she didn't realise what missing the exam meant. Fucking idiot that she is.

see Whiterthanwhite's post, behaviour like Alicia's does SO much damage. I have experienced this kind of behaviour with my own mum when she was alive, I'm not sure how she'd be now and though it's awful to say I think it has been a mercy in some ways for both of us that she died when she did.

halcyondays · 13/06/2012 14:19

"she didn't realise what missing the exam meant" Oh come on, nobody is that dumb.

If somebody posted "Aibu to get my 16 year old to miss a mock exam to babysit while I have a nose job done? What do you think the replies would be?
I'm sure the school were impressed.

Nancy66 · 13/06/2012 14:24

She doesn't rely on modelling for money - what work is she going to get as a model looking like that?

Birdsgottafly · 13/06/2012 15:19

"Oh come on, nobody is that dumb"

Yes they are that unknowing about academic life and what is needed, usually from parents who never went through school fully, or were under a different system as to what is used now. I work with them daily.

"She doesn't rely on modelling for money"

She is a glamour model, she is branching out into reality tv, so there will be many more threads about her. Her next one is to find a man to help her raise Papya. She is regulary on the 'Living' channel.

Cockwomble · 13/06/2012 15:22

Lord above that poor child.

Nancy66 · 13/06/2012 15:25

she is from a well-to-do middle-class family and went to a private school - she's not the child of junkies on a sink estate.

lashingsofbingeinghere · 13/06/2012 15:34

Come on, cut her some slack. At least she didn't leave her youngest in a pub lavatory.

pusswimpcheska · 13/06/2012 15:36

I could weep for Georgia :(

In the previous show Alicia said something along the lines of 'never again, this is my last surgery' and she says the same thing here.

She does look completely exhausted from the sheer responsibility of it all.

PandaWatch · 13/06/2012 15:39

I wonder how much of this was scripted for the TV show though.

Possibly the school arranged for her to take the mock at another time but it suits the producers of this voyeuristic sounding programme to make her look like as bad a mother as possible just to boost ratings even more.

Mrsjay · 13/06/2012 15:41

Of course she is Dumb she made her money from kiss and tell stories alicia was the go to shag girl in the 90s
, she had said she has body dysmorphia which is a genuine condition yet seeks no treatment
, she let her parents bring up her child and boarding school, she has no awarenes what her children need its all about her, and yes her daughter will be fine but no childshould feel that responsible for a parent, the programme i saw she took her to american so she could have an operation and she had her nursing her in a hotel room at 14 changing dressing and emptying drains all because Alicia wanted bigger boobs or a nose job , that is not fair on the girl ,

nickseasterchick · 13/06/2012 15:51

I did feel sorry for Georgia but im also aware that the editing and 'scripting' makes for good television,I think theres far worse parenting to discuss tbh.

Nancy66 · 13/06/2012 15:54

Mrs Jay - she couldn't have been the kiss and tell girl of the 90s - she was only born in 1980 !!!!!

splashymcsplash · 13/06/2012 15:57

I agree where are the fathers?

It's very easy to criticise Alicia, but she is a woman with MH problems who is bringing up 2 children on her own.

The fathers who have created these children and walked away deserve far more criticism.

bronze · 13/06/2012 16:03

Yeah nancy she is 32 bollocks

halcyondays · 13/06/2012 16:12

She is chasing the second father for maintenance. Obviously heshould be supporting his child. I've no idea what the story is with the first father so don't know whether criticism is due or not.

Mrsjay · 13/06/2012 16:18

yeah 1980 OKAY THEN she couldve been a teenager though if you really believe she is that young

Nancy66 · 13/06/2012 16:27

the absolute youngest she can be is 36 I reckon

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