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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

...to not be happy that my DH has been invited to play golf on Father's Day?

45 replies

LizziePizzie · 12/06/2012 13:07

MY DH has been invited to play golf with his brother and old school friends who are all fathers on Father's Day.

I am in 2 minds over whether this is a nice good thing as he loves playing golf and doesn't often get the chance, or whether he should spend the day with his DD instead? DD is just 2 and doesn't know what day of the week it is, let alone whether it is Father's Day!

Thoughts?

OP posts:
SpottyTeacakes · 12/06/2012 13:08

If it was me I wouldn't care. It's dd's birthday in fathers day anyway much more important Grin

MrsGaff · 12/06/2012 13:09

It's father's day. If he wants to play golf then he should go and play golf. I wouldn't mind if it were me.

GnocchiNineDoors · 12/06/2012 13:09

Surely Fathers Day is about Fathers doing something that is a treat to them in thanks for being a great father?

Therefore if he wants to play golf with a bunch of fellow dads, then that is good?

For Mothers Day I asked for a lie in.

redskyatnight · 12/06/2012 13:10

I woudln't care either.
If you want him to have a Fathers' Day with his DD, why not nominate another day?

notnowbernard · 12/06/2012 13:12

wouldn't care

sugarice · 12/06/2012 13:12

I wouldn't care.

TapDancingPimp · 12/06/2012 13:12

Don't necessarily think YABU but I'd let him go play the golf, let him unwind for the day. Maybe have a family tea when he gets home?

Original poster
LizziePizzie · 12/06/2012 13:12

I agree that he should do what he wants, but if it were me, i would want to be with my DD as that is what makes me a mum. He could play golf any time but this is but one day a year. (Yes I know he spends more time with his DD than playing golf...)

OP posts:
AWomanCalledHorse · 12/06/2012 13:14

I wouldn't care.

Birdsgottafly · 12/06/2012 13:15

Father's day is socially constructed, so it is unfair that anyone has to do anything that they don't want to on these days.

Mintyy · 12/06/2012 13:16

Having the rare chance to do something for himself that he enjoys is surely the whole point of fathers day? It is about him, not your dd.

BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack · 12/06/2012 13:19

Is it fathers day or DD day?? Let him play, you said he loves it and doesnt play that often so think of what a lovely fathers day he will have.

DD is 2, she wont have a clue.

Personally I think fathers day, mothers day, isnt there grandparents day.....it's all a load of commercialised rubbish.

HouseOfCheese · 12/06/2012 13:19

I wouldn't care.

As you say, your DD doesn't know what day of the week it is - would be different if she were older and wanted to prepare a special day for him.

If it matters that much to YOU, then maybe have a special meal the evening before or later on in the day or something?

chickydoo · 12/06/2012 13:20

My DH is also playing golf on Fathers day Smile but then again he plays every Sunday Sad even on mothers day Sad Sad
I wouldn't worry about it, as long as he's happy.

savoycabbage · 12/06/2012 13:20

It's not children's day! That's the point. As long as at some time you all get together be it at breakfast time or tea time then that's perfect. The dc can make him a cake or draw him a work of art whilst he is golfing.

BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack · 12/06/2012 13:20

I agree that he should do what he wants, but if it were me, i would want to be with my DD as that is what makes me a mum - I dont really get this...what makes you a mum??? Spending every waking hour with your child. I love my DS dearly but that would make me a demented woman!

Original poster
LizziePizzie · 12/06/2012 13:43

I thought the whole point of these days (commercialism aside) is to celebrate your relationship with your child. Yes I do spend every day with my DD but that is an extra special day, just like birthday's Christmas and NYE. They are all just another day, but they have another special 'label' attached to them. I am sentimental, romantic, soppy and I like to make these special days stand out from all the other normal days of the year.

OP posts:
BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack · 12/06/2012 13:47

See, thats where I differ - I think we should cherish/celebtrate our relationships with our kids/parents or whatever every day........I dont get this one day a year malarky, it's just a crock!

You know, take mum for granted but hey, once a year on mothers day we'll make her breakfast in bed and then the day after we're be back to treating her like a slave again.............that mentality makes no sense to me.

FunnysInLaJardin · 12/06/2012 13:50

it will be nice for your DH to do something just for himself that he enjoys on Fathers Day. For me Mothers Day is for me to do something nice just for myself, with some time with the DC too.

Rabbitee · 12/06/2012 13:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HeathRobinson · 12/06/2012 13:54

Golf - nice to get to do something for himself on Father's Day.

Nagoo · 12/06/2012 13:56

All I wanted for mother's day was some time off from my DCs.

If that makes me a bad mother, then so be it.

Let him do what he wants.

Itsjustafleshwound · 12/06/2012 13:56

It wouldn't faze me at all. Sometimes the nervy, money and time spent celebrating these Hallmark moments just makes for more stress. It isn't the whole day and there is nothing to stop you making your own family celebration sometime else.

Don't get hung up on dates ....

Itsjustafleshwound · 12/06/2012 13:57

Nervy ? I think I mean energy

MrsCampbellBlack · 12/06/2012 13:58

Last year on mother's day i went to London shopping and lunching with a friend - god, it was lovely.

So yabu I think.

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