To think snow white was just too stupid to live anyway

[thaliablogs]

the silly girl can't bring herself to reject the pretty belt when she knows her stepmother is out to get her, and, even worse, she then takes the comb after she's already nearly died once. And then an apple? An apple? Were the dwarves not feeding her?

outraged after reading my son his bedtime story.

but she's so pretty...

Don't know about her bout the prince in Cinderella is!

If I met someone and they ran but I loved them I think I would recognise them without having to make everyone try on a shoe

And you should see the Huntsman in the new film...wow

She is vain and silly, serves her right.

Prince in Cinderella is definitely an idiot, not only should he have recognized cinders, but he hasn't considered the possibility that someone else might have the same size shoes.

Is it just me, or is anyone else always on the side of the wolf in Three Little Pigs? Just once I'd like him to eat all the smug little bastards, and set up home in the house made of bricks (possibly with an attractive lady wolf)

kurri the fact the made a house of straw shows that they would be better off as bacon.

I agree but what about Thumbalina? A tiny little girl that lives in a flower? She was going to marry a toad, against her will, but then let a bird take her to another country. Then she marries a man she's only just met and he gives her wings and changes her name!

Disney was too stupid to know the plural of dwarf is dwarfs not dwarves.

PMSL
SW definitely too stupid to live & The 3 Pigs are in that camp too.
Hansel & Gretel should have got what was coming to them - wandering off like that. That would have learned them.

checks spelling

realises am as stupid as Disney

hangs head in shame

Hmm was not supposed to be bold sorry

Clearly even more incompetent than I thought

Hansel and Gretel didn't wander off - they were abandoned in the middle of the woods!

Snow White is stupid because she is nice, and all nice people are stupid didn't you know?

Disney ruined the stories.

And Little Red Riding Hood - why all that stuff about "What big eyes "

Why didn't she just run and get the woodcutter?

And don't get me started on Goldilocks. Breaking and entry.

Little red riding hood annoys me. If I was her I'd have thought fuck this shit and gone and got help. Think I'd know my grandma wasn't a hairy wolf without asking questions

Hansel & Gretel

Why wasn't the dad prosecuted for child cruelty/neglect?
Poor witch, minding her own business when nosey children break into her house. But then, poor children only wanted something to eat.
Poor witch (again) living in a substandard gingerbread house, which shouldn't have passed building regs.
Why wasn't the witch being taken meals on wheels and being visited by carers? So she wouldn't try to eat children (plays havoc with NHS dentures).
Investigate the local coucil officer and builder.

All could be solved if the woodcutter could supply wood to the local non-dodgy builders and then he could afford to feed his children, who wouldn't be abandoned in the woods, who wouldn't eat the witches house, who wouldn't try to kill them.

Who's to blame - local council of course!!!

Cinderella's bloody shoe...
The Prince can find her because she's the ONLY girl it will fit. If it's such a perfect fit, why the fuck did it come off in the first place? Hmmmmm?
Stupid story.

And what about Jack (of Jack and the Beanstalk) who in their right frigging mind exchanges a cow for 5 beans knowing that this is the last thing available to raise any money at all with. I mean honestly if you sent your DS down to cash converters to sell his Wii so you could buy a decent meal what on earth would you think he he came back with five stupid beans

If I was Jack's mum I'd have just killed the cow and had burgers

Ok so in the running for stupidest storybook character we have:

-- snow white on the basis of pure dimwittedness
-- cinderella's prince for being blind as a bat and ignorant of women's anatomy
-- three pigs for being feeble ( at least 2 of them)
-- little red riding hood for being foolhardy
-- goldilocks for being entitled

Any further nominations? Votes? (am assuming hansel and gretel not actually nominated due to abandonment and father and witch victims of society rather than stupid)

what irritates me about hansel and gretel is that the step mother (mother in the original) convinces the dad to abandon the kids. when they get home the step mother is dead and the dad is forgiven because he is just some weak man

When I read DS the book I made sure he understood what a bad father he was and we shouldn't just blame the step mother (and witch!)

My nomination - Sleeping Beauty's parents - what on earth possessed them to snub the evil fairy?

I was just about to add sleeping beauty for that reason everybody

The troll from Three Billy Goat Gruff

'I'm a troll, fol-de-rol' - shut up fool, sit quietly under the bridge then jump out and surprise them, don't announce your presence.

The girl in Rapunzel who uses her hair as rope to allow her lover to climb up.

That's got to hurt.

Rapunzel had not the savvy to ask her lover who climbed up her plait night after night to get hold of a rope or a ladder (or scissors to cut off the plait early doors thereby securing an escape route). Nope, dimwit accepted her fate.

Fairy tale girls are a bit rubbish.

The suss ones probably all got edited out by the Victorian gents collecting the stories as being un-ladylike hussies!