what is the point of sleepovers?

[MateyM00]

Last night DD (8) had two friends to sleep over, both are only children just like dd.

Anyway, they did the usaual sleepover things then settled to bed a 10, but they were so excited they couldnt sleep.

on child nodded off at midnight but DD and the other child were still chatting and giggling at 3.30 this morning.

DH gruffily said, thats the last time she has a sleepover.... I said, i think its quite sweet actually, they arent doing any harm.

so they were up at 8 this morning and i got up with them. DH stayed in bed till 9 and now he has gone out in a huff.

so... is he being unreasonable and missing the point of sleepovers or
am I being unreasonable asking him to put up with giggling girls at 3.30 in the morning?

See I always think the point of sleepovers is to make the parents appreciate the fact that they only have to do this occasionally and to make them realise their own house isn't that noisy after all.

DD calls them "Wake overs"!

I must confess I'd have told 8 y to shut up and go to sleep at 3.30am.

11y DD2 and her friends would just be told to be quieter (see above).
Teen DD1 and her friends actually do some sleeping, but their mums don't appreciate being returned zombies. They also have younger siblings and know peace to crash is very unlikely.

My DD's friend's parents and me call them stayovers because there's never any sleep involved!

Sounds hellish!
I'm with your DH - sorry.

Fun for children but your DH is mad if he expected it to be a sleepover.

We have sleepovers a lot and have done since ds was about 8 however if any child was still awake at 3.30am they would be sent home. Fuck that, I'd be well pissed off! Lights out at 10 and no talking past 10.30 and ds is 11. And before anyone says 'Ooooo but thats so mean' it can't be THAT mean as we seem to have a steady stream of little visitors wanting to stay over

DS once had a WAKE-over, at about 10yo went to a friend's house & the kids didn't sleep all night . But the parents were fine, boys old enough not to keep others awake.

The point is , kids enjoy them and memories of childhood are made. Tell him to stop being a misery guts.

This.

Have them on Friday nights- after getting up early and then being at school all day there'll be a much better chance of them all being zonked out by 3:30! I remember reading in my bible Girl Talk aged 8 a piece on "Top Tips for a Great Sleepover", one of which was "Go to sleep early so you can continue the fun in the morning!". Clearly written by an exhausted parent.

thanks for all the support on this...

My DD loves 'sleep'overs! and I loved them when I was young!
Lots of chatting and giggling, watching films, eating snacks- it's a child's version of a night out (albeit in) with friends!

I hate them, and if I were woken up at 3.30 I'd be furious - and there wouldn't be any more for a long time! The ones we had always seemed to end up in a telling off for noise, or tears from the child who wanted to sleep and couldn't. What is the point?

I never had any as I kid, I don't think they'd invented then...

I think 3.30am is taking the piss royally.

If I were your DH I would have gone in to them about midnight and told them I didn't want to hear another peep out of them until the morning.

Just because it's 'fun', doesn't mean they don't have to respect the fact there are other people in the house worth considering.

'sleep'over - the most incorrectly named thing since the 'fun sized' chocolate bar.

The point of them is for the children to have fun, stay up most of the night and eat lots of rubbish.

I am not hog whimpering wild about the after effects - let alone the pressure to talk to Mr Inferior and resist his attempts to suggest Wild Sex As We Are Alone - but they do like them.

And wot Cory said. The best things in life are fairly pointless.

I think you've done remarkably well to avoid an appearance by your bed at 3.30 from a tearful sleeping over child who has developed a sudden and determined need to "Go Home Now!".

But I think your DH is being a bit of a misery in suggesting there will be no further sleepovers. Just set some basic rules in place that involve either no talking after a certain time or that any talking must be inaudible to everyone else in the house. Or put them in a tent in the garden. Although on second thoughts, camping has a tendency to encourage the urgent, silly o'clock need to be taken home.

I used to love sleepovers. Films and sleeping bags on the floor and junk food. Can't wait for my boys to start having them!

Motherinferior

DD is 11 and her friends do go to sleep at sleepovers. DS is 14 and his friends were awake all night, went to sleep at 6 am and got back up at lunchtime.

I can sleep through anything though, so it doesn't really bother me. It would be different if the younger ones were up all night because I would feel I had to supervise to some extent.

I'd shush them before midnight, and there is no freakin way that Father Christmas is coming at 3am. Noooooooo way.

Agree about Christmas. Mine wake up earlier, but play games until 8, when they come and wake us up.

I'm with your dh too. But with 3 dc and a never ending nagged 'to do' list of blimmin sleepovers my sense of humor is completely shot regarding this subject.

They are a horrible mutation of 'friend to tea' and where that ends with a sigh of relief and a fond farewell after a couple of hours, the sleepover takes on a life of its own and into realms of despair.

There is a formula which goes:

Dd(13)+5 friends+3am+dh=where's the gin?

I completely don't like them. Sorry.

I don't really enjoy having them (can't relax totally with someone here, have to be careful when changing etc) but do them for the kids. Not more than once a month for each. Also I had 4 girls once and it was too rowdy so now only have 1/2 kids. I just give them some junk food treats (after healthyish tea of course) a dvd and leave them to it. I also have a fan on to drown them out. Some of DD's friends have never had sleepovers and aren't allowed and some have them every week so i thnik doing them every now and then is a good comprimise.

Yes! The competetive parents who up the ante and have sleepovers all the time They are piling on the pressure.

You think 'Great I've ticked young Ferdie off the list..' and his parents then immediately bounce back a return invite before you can draw breath. Aargh I cant keep up!