To be annoyed with dds school (uniform related)

[lollilou]

In her last week before half term dds shoes fell apart. Not a problem I thought I'll get her new ones during the half term so for the last 2 days of school she went in to school in black ballet pumps with studs on the front.I live 12 miles from the nearest shoe shop so went on-line and ordered her a pair of nice black brogues. So on the Friday she was pulled out of assembly and something was written down about her uniform she was not told what the problem was. Yesterday we received a letter stating that her shoes were not acceptable and that shoes must be black and polishable. Her new ones are not, though they are smart and black. The letter states that if she does not have the correct uniform she will not be allowed to attend lessons! Aibu to send her in them(well actually she has to wear them no money for another pair and no time either) Dh thinks we should send a covering letter, should we?

I would send the note, these ridiculous school rules about uniform annoy the hell out of me.

Did you send her a letter with the shoes explaining? You must have known they were about to fall apart at least a few days before they did so not sure that's an excuse. That said, a letter should have sufficed.

Is the rule a surprise, ie have you never been informed of this before? If so you'd have a case for saying she needs to wear the shoes you've bought. If not, you've bought shoes that break the uniform policy - send them back and order different ones. Very surprised you didn't automatically send the child in with a letter about the original broken shoes. Not fair to let her deal with it I think.

Does sound like a daft rule, but I don't think you dealt with it too well tbh.

I never choose my childrens school on their uniform policy.

or chose*

I do know that some parents think that the stricter the uniform the better the school though.

I'd just send her in with the new shoes. It was the ballet ones they complained about.

I assume that it was the ballet ones - mine are still on half term so I guessed your DD hadn't worn the new ones to school yet.

is this primary or secondary?

Seems a bit harsh to expect instant new shoes, they might have disintigrated that morning! I would have sent a letter in with the unsuitable ballet flats to explain that you knew they were wrong, but hadn't had time to replace them with approved shoes. But yes, a letter is the way to go I think.

(I had to do the last two days of my O-levels in a denim skirt because my school skirt was irrepairably damaged, there was no way anyone was buying a new navy-blue approved skirt for two days of school).

why would you order new shoes which would not conform to their policy ?

Send her with the new ones. Inform the school that you had already ordered these new ones and you are not in the business of replacing perfectly adequate shoes on the basis that the HT thinks you should be able to put fucking polish on them. But only if they ask.

I mean, really!!!!! If I taught at this school, I'd be angry at my time being wasted if I was asked to check that mini-lollilou's shoes could be polished!!!

I bet no-one notices or mentions it. Makes your DD knows not to say anything. "Just go to school as normal, dear!"

Secondary, dd is 12. Yes it was the ballet ones they complained about, her original ones would have lasted for the 2 days if it wasn't raining. I'm pretty sure this is a new rule about shoes having to be polishable.
I'm a bit annoyed that we only received the letter yesterday so no time to get new ones, had the school told dd what was wrong and the policy we would not be having this problem.
I didn't choose to send her there it is the only secondary school in the area.
The new shoes are v.smart and black but a suede material.
Anyone know what would happen if I polished them?

didn t they give you a uniform list before she started

Surely it's kind of common sense to know what constitutes school shoes? Suede shoes would not count as school shoes in my book as they can't be polished when scuffed etc. Is there no written uniform policy? If there is and you ignored it then you were unreasonable, if the school is generally lax and shoes not specified then I guess you could try and argue the toss but I think you should deal with it, not let your DD get grief over your choice.

Suede shoes? For school? Which will presumably have to be worn in the rain sometimes?

Can you return them and buy leather school shoes? Think it'll save you some future hassle and expense...

Even without uniform policy I would have thought suede wasn't the most sensible material for school shoes

Nobody with common sense would have bought their child suede school shoes so I can't imagine school and going to have much sympathy for you.

They probably singled her out because the studs are so visible. There's a fair chance that they won't notice that the new ones are suede. I'd give her a letter apologising and explaining to keep in her bag and hope she doesn't have to use it.

The "polishable" thing is probably just their way of trying to express that they should be leather, not fabric or suede etc. Ballet flats are so popular now that most secondary age girls would wear them to school if allowed but they are not really very robust, nor do they look very smart. A back-up pair from somewhere cheap and cheerful might be a plan in future in case they break, get wet / left somewhere but I think you should have sent a letter in with your DD - if someone in my form group came in with non-uniform shoes I would ask them about it and usually expect a letter (though if it was a one-off I would be ok to accept the child's explanation).

I see plenty of girls at school wearing Ugg-style black boots - lovely after a few months of walking through puddles.