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AIBU?

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Original poster

Nearly in tears at the school gates , bullied by a teacher !

115 replies

sadalot · 29/05/2012 22:53

I am taking my two children and my dh on a much needed holiday after half term. My dd is autistic and have received some money onwards a holiday. The deputy head granted me 5 days holiday. My son is in year 3 and I have now been told that he will miss 15 tests in that week and that they will not be able to take the tests this week or when he comes back. I have also been told that by missing all these tests he will go down a set. The head of year 3 started shouting at me in the playground and then told me she had to go because she had 20 children waiting for her in a after school club. I felt like crying, I play a big part in my children's education and I feel like shit because I am taking them on holiday. I pay for extra tuition for both my children and they are generally happy at school. WWYD next?

OP posts:
Original poster
sadalot · 30/05/2012 00:01

I went in march to get permission for the holiday. The deputy said he would allow it as it was not in year 6. They have had plenty of time to reschedule the exams. But seriously what are these 15 tests about because I repeat he is only in year 3 not year 10 or 11. What really gets me is that she spoke to me as she would to a naughty year 3 child.For gods sake I am 36 year old women !

OP posts:
PooshTun · 30/05/2012 00:01

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squeakytoy · 30/05/2012 00:06

Poosh, you cant even read it clearly enough to understand that the child missing tests is a boy, so why not try reading it again.

Original poster
sadalot · 30/05/2012 00:08

For your information I am a 2:1 science graduate and I will help and tutor my kids until my dying day especially my dd who is beautiful autistic child.

OP posts:
bobbledunk · 30/05/2012 00:09

poosh; seriously you can't afford to eat at a proper restaurant? My kids won't be serving you anywhere and no a stupid test at eight is not going to determine a child's future.

squeakytoy · 30/05/2012 00:13

Poosh, what would be so bad about anyone working in McDonalds? they have a very good promotion structure, an excellent employment record, and a decent salary...

Probably pay better wages than the naice little bistro down the road.. Wink

WorraLiberty · 30/05/2012 00:14

Look as much as I don't believe in term time holidays, the Deputy Head allowed it and that's all that matters imo.

So what if your son drops down a set? Come September his Teacher will move him up again anyway...or to whatever set suits his ability.

As for the shouting, if you can put your hand on your heart and say she really shouted...and that you didn't just interpret it that way because it was an awkward conversation, you have every right to complain.

MarySA · 30/05/2012 00:15

What a nasty bully this teacher sounds. You've already had the permission to take the holiday from the Deputy Head. I'd complain to her. What about the children off sick on the test days. Will they be moved down a set too.

ChippingInNeedsCoffee · 30/05/2012 00:18

Definitely go and see the Head.

It was not up to this person to take you to task about it.

It was not the time nor the place - even if it had been their right to do so.

He is in Year 3 - tests are not important and any decent teacher would simply assess his level in other ways.

Thankfully the year end is almost upon us so you wont have to deal with this twit for too long. Hopefully they Head will put them in their place!

PooshTun · 30/05/2012 00:19

For your information I am a 2:1 science graduate and I will help and tutor my kids until my dying day especially my dd who is beautiful autistic child.

Your degree and your degree classification has no bearing on my comment about you taking DC on holiday during term time so why mention it?

BrigitBigKnickers · 30/05/2012 00:23

I am a teacher and I would find it very annoying for a child to disappear during test week or any other time for that matter (except perhaps the last week of the Christmas or Summer term where very little new learning is happening.)

Having said that a teacher should not be basing her assessments purely on how a child performs in a test on any one specific day of the year. (and 15 tests??? I could only think of a maximum of ten and even if there were 15, it would be unreasonable to expect 7 and 8 year olds to do that many in one week.)

She should have a file on ongoing assessments on your child which will inform on his current levels and progress. It's called APP. Perhaps you could ask to see his assessment file and enquire how you can assist in keeping his levels up (bet that would rattle her cage Grin) He has been in her class for a year- surely she knows what level he is performing at from his day to day work.

To suggest he will have to go down a group as he hasn't taken the tests (especially in year 3) is preposterous.

Having said that- did the school not tell you when the tests were going to be? Surely the deputy who authorised the absence knows when her staff are gouing to test their pupils- it's usually a whole staff arranged thing. Sounds a rather badly organised school...

TheHouseOnTheCorner · 30/05/2012 00:25

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PooshTun · 30/05/2012 00:26

"and no a stupid test at eight is not going to determine a child's future."

I know it won't but your attitude towards your child'd education will.

ChippingInNeedsCoffee · 30/05/2012 00:28

Poosh - you are right :) You are wrong!!

... as well as rude.

TheHouseOnTheCorner · 30/05/2012 00:29

A holiday is very important for a family with the added stress of coping with SEN poosh and since the holiday has been ok'd by someone with more clout than the teacher, she can't complain as the odds have been weighed up.

The holiday will enrich the family's life and by default, the education of the DC.

PooshTun · 30/05/2012 00:31

"Poosh - you are right smile You are wrong!!

... as well as rude."

I'll try not to let that keep me up tonight.

mistlethrush · 30/05/2012 00:33

Poosh, clearly you know more about this family's circumstances than the Deputy Head who has granted leave presumably based upon the unique situation that the OP has Hmm

She was not asking if she was reasonable taking him out of school, she knows she's reasonable because the Deputy Head has agreed that. She has been asking on advice because a different teacher shouted at her in the playground.

This is not an 'am I wrong to take holidays in term time' thread.

manicbmc · 30/05/2012 00:33

Speak to the head or deputy. You've had the holiday officially sanctioned and the teacher should not have spoken to you like that. It's not like you're going on holiday on a whim.

bobbledunk · 30/05/2012 00:34

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PooshTun · 30/05/2012 00:38

"Poosh, what would be so bad about anyone working in McDonalds? they have a very good promotion structure, an excellent employment record, and a decent salary..."

Another parent with high aspirations for her DCs. Being able to go from being a burger flipper to a drive thru order taker is hardly a 'good promotiom structure'.

The Americans refer to a dead end job as a MacJob for obvious reasons.

thatisall · 30/05/2012 00:39

15 tests in one week...in year 3?????? Isn't that a bit much for any child, especially aged 8 anyway?

How dare she shout at you, how dare she try and over-rule her boss, have you gone to the head yet?

TheHouseOnTheCorner · 30/05/2012 00:39

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WorraLiberty · 30/05/2012 00:42

Another parent with high aspirations for her DCs. Being able to go from being a burger flipper to a drive thru order taker is hardly a 'good promotiom structure'

And can your limited imagination not take account of the fact that squeaky didn't mention her own family there?

McDonalds are good employers, like it or not. They pay a decent wage and their hours are very parent and student friendly.

That statement is a fact and has nothing to do with Squeaky's family or anything else personal to her.

PooshTun · 30/05/2012 00:42

I obviously touched a nerve boobledunk.

A lesser person would, at this point, post their degree classification in response but not me :o

WorraLiberty · 30/05/2012 00:46

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